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  • get busy living ?

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    Old 01-03-2015, 06:28 PM   #1
    angryjohnny31
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    get busy living ?

    I'm a 36 yr old male and have been depressed most if not all of my life. I didn't really know why I felt this way all the time. Also, anxiety is a huge issue. I guess it started with having parents who never wanted me , now they still only care about themselves and they are 70. I was married once, thats when it got really bad. She left me on Christmas 6yrs ago. I finally found a girl I liked alot and took a chance. 7 months later she also left, back to her ex. It pretty much killed me inside.

    It's been a little over 2 months and I'm still extremely depressed. I'm on meds. I'm completely alone, no real friends, absolutely no family, barely any work. So what do I have to look forward to? I have one hobby, going to the gym. Sometimes, research on what's really going on in the country/world. Mostly I watch TV to keep my mind off of everything. I have no one to talk to, people don't care.

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    Old 01-05-2015, 09:07 AM   #2
    keenobserver
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Hi, Sorry to hear about your unfortunate situation. You have gone through quite a lot in your life and I think the thing you can look forward to is enjoying the things you use to enjoy before. In my opinion if you enjoyed something once in your life you are likely to enjoy it again. I am sure you had some good times in your past relationships and it may be hard to grasp at the moment but you can find more, possibly better ones in the future. Keep it going, there will always be something to look forward to. Thanks

     
    Old 01-05-2015, 10:50 AM   #3
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Horrible advice.

     
    Old 01-07-2015, 09:03 AM   #4
    keenobserver
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by angryjohnny31 View Post
    Horrible advice.
    Care to explain why you think such?

     
    Old 01-07-2015, 10:20 AM   #5
    rosequartz
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by angryjohnny31 View Post
    Horrible advice.
    you say no one cares, but when someone does care enough to offer you advice, that's your response? johnny your name fits.....sounds like you are angry AND bitter, and that's probably why you aren't having any luck with the ladies......
    most people don't enjoy being around someone like that......

     
    Old 01-07-2015, 10:31 AM   #6
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    Re: get busy living ?

    There's alot more to the story. I try extremely hard. I do so much for people and I get no appreciation. So, u know nothing about me or the girl I was with. She lied, stole and cheated. I deserve that?

     
    Old 01-07-2015, 10:45 AM   #7
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by angryjohnny31 View Post
    There's alot more to the story. I try extremely hard. I do so much for people and I get no appreciation. So, u know nothing about me or the girl I was with. She lied, stole and cheated. I deserve that?
    I didn't say you deserved that.....what I DID say is that no one likes to be around someone with an angry, bitter negative attitude....
    if there is more to the story, please fill us in.....maybe we can give better advice....

     
    Old 01-07-2015, 04:01 PM   #8
    angryjohnny31
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    Re: get busy living ?

    I'm not looking for a fight on here. Sure their is more to the story. The ex girlfriend is not the only reason for my issues, much more to the causes of my depression. I'm totally alone and trying to deal with everything. She was just the last straw. Also, she had way more problems then myself. I've been left by people my whole life. My family (mom) left when I was out of school, my dad when I was 12. I was blamed for all of that. To this day, I'm still blamed. I've had bad luck my entire life, one thing after another. I somehow have survived. A time comes when a person can only take so much rejection. I had a lot of friends most of my life, but people move on, get married, have kids etc... I stay in the same type of life I've always had. Nothing good ever happens. I work hard and I get nowhere. You can say I make bad choices, but not this many. It's as if there is a curse on me. I'm not joking. Honestly, I haven't been happy for more than a day or two as long as I can remember. This is no way to live. I have hobbies, go to the gym for 16yrs, research and read quite a bit about the world we actually live in. My conclusion is lies, corruption , cheating, stealing is how you succeed. I'm not that way.

     
    Old 01-09-2015, 06:40 AM   #9
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Hi, It is an unfortunate upbringing that you had to deal with. You say you have a lot of bad luck but you are still capable of turning things around. I believe you are healthy going to the gym and in my opinion as long as you can operate properly you can always turn your unhappiness around.

    It seems as though you need to change your life around quite a bit. If you want to follow our advice then you have to take chances and take some uncomfortable steps. Perhaps a psychiatrist will help you in this regard. My suggestion to you though is to start making small steps in achieving a goal that you believe will make you happy. Striving for that goal will open up a lot of opportunities that you might not always be happy with but it will give you the chance to move forward in life.

    p.s. commenting on the advice with short answers do not solve anything. You can at least evaluate for yourself what is wrong and probably analyse it for yourself.

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by angryjohnny31 View Post
    I'm not looking for a fight on here. Sure their is more to the story. The ex girlfriend is not the only reason for my issues, much more to the causes of my depression. I'm totally alone and trying to deal with everything. She was just the last straw. Also, she had way more problems then myself. I've been left by people my whole life. My family (mom) left when I was out of school, my dad when I was 12. I was blamed for all of that. To this day, I'm still blamed. I've had bad luck my entire life, one thing after another. I somehow have survived. A time comes when a person can only take so much rejection. I had a lot of friends most of my life, but people move on, get married, have kids etc... I stay in the same type of life I've always had. Nothing good ever happens. I work hard and I get nowhere. You can say I make bad choices, but not this many. It's as if there is a curse on me. I'm not joking. Honestly, I haven't been happy for more than a day or two as long as I can remember. This is no way to live. I have hobbies, go to the gym for 16yrs, research and read quite a bit about the world we actually live in. My conclusion is lies, corruption , cheating, stealing is how you succeed. I'm not that way.

     
    Old 01-11-2015, 07:01 PM   #10
    DSMwarrior
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Keenobserver is right. Take time, slow down, focus on what you do have. When you're about to lash out..slow down.

    Then ACTIVELY move those thoughts away from yourself and consider what you can do for another without any reciprocity or expectations. I mean this - EXPECT them to spit in your face because you're being altruistic and then be happy when you're proven wrong. And when you're proven right don't be disappointed, move on to someone else. It works like the laws of physics work.

    And then do what keenobserver recommended and seek out a good therapist. They're paid to listen with no stake in the game other than your good health. Friends, family, etc. - all come with baggage. Therapists don't.

     
    Old 01-12-2015, 08:13 AM   #11
    angryjohnny31
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    Re: get busy living ?

    Good advice. Thanks. I just don't have money for a therapist. I'm now out of work.

     
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