| Multiple health conditions. how to deal with lack of support??
So I have many health conditions... depression and anxiety, endometriosis, allergies, dystonia and trigeminal neuralgia (TN has been in remission for awhile ).
I don't mean to sound like a victim but I genuinely feel I lack a supportive social network that many people with health conditions are at least fortunate enough to have. I rarely talk to my mom because she's not interested in hearing about any of my health issues and if I ever bring it up she'll just hang up the phone. Besides that, she says negative things about anyone who is sick, for example, my grandpa has myasthenia gravis and is dying from old age and my mom made a comment that he loves being sick because he gets to bask in all the attention and get sympathy. My boyfriend tells me to get over it and then will go on about how he has much worse health problems. For example, last year he had a herniated disc and years ago he had a carotid cyst in his jaw that may or may not have been cancer (he said the lab lost the pathology). My work is not understanding at all, and besides that I hate working there. I work 10am til 5pm 5 days a week with a one hour unpaid break for lunch. I think that's basically full time or at least close enough but I'm not included on the health or dental coverage plan that other employees at my work get. I have to get $2000 worth of dental work done to get my cavities filled but I can't even afford that on my minimum wage job with no benefits, I cancelled my appointment with the dentist and told his office that I can't agree to treatment that I can't pay for. I can't afford my medication either so I end up being unable to cooperate with my doctor's treatment regimen and eventually get dropped as a patient for non-compliance. Right now, the only medication I'm taking is a benzodiazepine to manage my dystonia (which is the most painful of my health problems) The cost of that is $20 a month, that's all I can afford. It's helping my dystonia but I'm having side effects. Missed work today because I slept in too late, called in sick, then went back to bed for several hours. I also feel I've been really agitated and aggressive since started the benzodiazepines two weeks ago. Yesterday at work I was so annoyed by this particular customer that I wanted to physically harm her and end her life. When I talked to my boyfriend about this, he said I'd never do that because I'm not the type of person who'd hurt someone else, but I felt I was in such a rage that I can't control myself.
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