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gree23 12-05-2012 12:40 PM

I want to tell my therapist how bad I feel but I am too scared
I'm a thirty year old women with cerebral palsy I use a powerchair and work in an office daily. I have been in therapy for the last 2 years for issues relating to my disability and servere family problems. I have been told that my therapy will be an ongoing thing until i feel ready to go into independent living. I am feeling very angry at the moment <and so severely depressed so that I don't wnat to be here> and I need to talk about it.

Just recently I told my therapist of phyical abuse that happened to me as a child and teenager. I am afriad that he will think that I'm just adding to my story to make it sound worse or something.

Any advice would be very much apprecieted.

kye021 12-05-2012 05:33 PM

Re: I want to tell my therapist how bad I feel but I am too scared
Trust is a huge part of therapy. If cannot trust your therapist, then you souldn't see him. FInd someone you can trust enough to tell the absolute truth to without fear of jugdement.

I suffer from bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder and ptsd from issues in my childhood. I also self harm and have recurring feelings of "wishing I was gone". I have no fear of speaking about this with my current therapist. Now, my old therapist...there is no way in hell I would trust him with that much of myself.

I knew more about his problems than he did of mine. He would reopen wounds that left me self destructive and very depressed.I cut so much with him that it wasn't even funny. Then after bringing that all up he would talk to me about movies or tv shows, or nonsense like that. He actually called his girlfriend during our session to tell her about a movie star's son being the boy who played in the movie. He was very toxic for me and that lasted two years. He believed that because he was much older ( i was about 21-21 at the time, and he was about 63) that he knew everything. He thought he knew more about me because I of my diagnosis, than I did. Or that he could say things and assume things about me that he had no right.

With my current therapist, I instantly felt like I could trust her, unlike the other. Whenever I have my episode, as I like to call them. I feel very comfortable telling her. She is an awesome listener and does not jump to conclusions. She talks me through my emotions, and the reasons behind them and then together we find a way to handle it.

Find a therapist like that, and you will have no worry about speaking your complete thoughts and worries.

Delo 12-06-2012 01:19 PM

Re: I want to tell my therapist how bad I feel but I am too scared
I don't understand why you are "scared" to tell your therapist how bad you feel? What is the worst thing that can happen if you are honest? You have to trust your therapist is the number one rule. I have always felt better speaking to females about my issues (Bipolar, adhd, arthritis) All the health care professionals in my life are women. That is my rule. Im not some bra burning feminist but I feel a woman can understand your needs better. If you do not trust your therapist you need to move on and find another one. If this is the first one you have seen that doesnt mean you have to stick with him. Your insurance provider has a wealth of information that can help you out. If you feel you have to hide things from him that is not good. Hopefully he can gain your trust because starting over with a new therapist SUCKS!!! Good luck and I hope I helped you in some way.

Darydien 01-15-2013 03:02 AM

Re: I want to tell my therapist how bad I feel but I am too scared
trust is one of the big issues, but you also have to look at yourself and ask 'are you doing the most you can to make the therapy sessions successful?' Without honestly telling your therapist what is going on, are you helping yourself? Even if it's just telling your therapist you don't trust them enough to talk to them about everything, you will be helping yourself.

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