Help with grandparent boundaries / legal action

jena88

I have a daughter with an ex boyfriend. We have shared custody and get along super well. We are both relocating to a new state.

Now, I’ve lived with my family through out my child’s life. It’s a very complicated situation. When my child was born, I was a teen. My family was very quick to get attached to her. They offered and asked me on multiple occasions to give her up to them. But I never felt comfortable. They also used fear to control my decisions. They tried telling me her father would try to take my child from me. They told me to hide my anxiety problems from everyone because no one would accept me and that it would be used against me. They told me the world was out to get me and they were the only ones I could trust. Causing me to grow incredibly dependent during my time of need. So when anyone tried helping me, they shielded me away from that help by encouraging me to lie about them because otherwise I would in return be hurt. My family imposed on my relationship with my daughter. Made decisions for me. Took my state given assistance and child support so they can strictly use it for her. I fought for it on multiple occasions. They schedule things without my permission with her. They touch her belongings. They tried convincing me I was autistic so I socially withdrew from everyone out of fear. They use her child support to take her on vacations without me. They monitored my relationships. Hell, they even put security cameras in our home to spy on me specifically. I constantly try to take back my relationship with my daughter.

I finally got help behind their back and was diagnosed with PTSD and was explained that none of this was normal. And encouraged that I leave so my daughter and I can live a better life. And told me my PTSD symptoms aren’t improving because of them. Which is why I’m moving. And her father agreed and is relocating to the same city.
Now, I’m suppose to moving very soon. But the plan was to move ahead of time to get our home and essentials established while my daughter finishes school and while her father finds a place. And while my family has tried stopping the move for a long time, they finally “let me”. Then it came out that her father was going to slowly wean her off of them since they are close. My parents hated this. They are threatening us with a lawyer so that for the few months I’m gone, no weaning happens (which gives my parents more time with her than her own father) and so they get summer visitation. Her father and I agreed that some weaning is good. And agreed to give them 3 weeks in the summer. Which was not enough for them. I’m pretty anxious about all of this because I’m terrified of confrontation from them. This is all a huge nightmare, as I’m just trying to save my daughter and i’s relationship and overall quality of life. Same with her father’s. We are all in our mid 20s to 30s and just trying to live a normal life without them trying to impose.
I’m worried if they take him to court that I’ll legally have to stay (after finally getting approved for a place)
I just need some advice. I’m not good at standing my ground in this scenario but am trying my best. What am I suppose to do? What should I do? We are considering that I just bring her with me to move now. So there’s no few months in between.