It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Divorce & Separation Message Board

help-heading for divorce

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 11-01-2006, 08:17 AM   #1
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: vancouver
Posts: 2
basshead HB User
help-heading for divorce

so my wife and i have been having problems.
comunication exsits in one direction.
i understand what she says to me very well, and can reiterate what was said.

this s not a two way street.
i talk to her and what i have said has been misconstrued, and from my point of view, not all that was said was heard.

so what i say gets taken in a completly diferent direction and i end up fighting ghosts.

things i didnt say, and what i mean gets lost.

it has been a problem for a while, and it has affected our sex lives.

how can i have sex, or even talk to her when she is on a rant about something that dosnt exist?

this has been a problem for a couple of years.

Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 11-01-2006, 09:16 AM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 1,041
desertdweller HB User
Re: help-heading for divorce

Welcome to the differences between men and women. There was a reason the book Men are from Mars, and Women are from Venus sold so many copies. My only suggestion is to try couples counseling. Counselors kind of work like an interpreter.

Old 11-19-2006, 05:11 PM   #3
hairier yet..
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Alabama,USA
Posts: 502
hairier yet.. HB User
Re: help-heading for divorce


Try this - Ask her if she trusts you. If you get a yes, without doubt assure her she's taking your words the wrong way. She what she says then. If she can't stop the misconstruing, then she may have a hang up about just wanting to believe what she wants to believe. I don't know for sure, but it could be a form of being a control freak. I'm not saying that she is, but what do you think? Again, not to imply, but there are many people in the world that think the rest of the world is wrong if others dont think the way they do.

All the best. Hope divorce court says out of the picture.


Old 11-23-2006, 06:28 PM   #4
Junior Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Singapore. But I come from Mauritius
Posts: 11
glerio HB User
Re: help-heading for divorce

There is another simpler book which you can you for a quick fix about your problems with communication.

"WHy MEn don't have a clue and why Women always need more shoes", by Marbara and Allan Pease.


Here's what can help you for the time being

We guys normally mean what we say....i.e we use direct words
But women often use indirect speech, specially betw themselves, and they forget that man are not women, so when you are saying something, she tends to hear sthg else.
Tell her about that too.

And moreover,
WOmen deal with stress by talking about it, withouht requiring you to input solutions, where as Man prefer to be alone and think about it. Let her know that as well, as if you are not talking to her, she might immediately assume taht you are angry at her.


IN anycase, you wil HAVE to get "Men are from Mars Women Venus " in the end. Go read it, AND BOTH OF YOU

Last edited by glerio; 11-23-2006 at 06:35 PM.

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
Please Help! Becoming So Discouraged... MizzFox Weight Loss 10 05-18-2010 12:35 PM
Another worried daughter needs help...Dad has Stage 4 PC. Chadhas Family & Friends of Cancer Patients 5 05-17-2010 07:50 PM
Help me diagnose unwellman Bowel Disorders 5 05-14-2010 10:54 PM
menopause or low ferritin pleaseee help maku Menopause 13 05-14-2010 12:59 AM
Do bananas help or harm you & Other comprehensive list! amarula Acid Reflux / GERD 6 05-12-2010 08:20 PM
Anxiety Returned: Help MayEducator Anxiety 2 05-12-2010 03:09 PM
God please help me......... himmylover Hormone Problems 5 05-12-2010 09:51 AM
Please help me understand my lab tests maryquite Thyroid Disorders 5 05-12-2010 07:02 AM
Need help reading Cervical MRI - Mild central stenosis donnacousa Spinal Cord Disorders 0 05-11-2010 09:09 AM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:01 AM.

Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
© 1998-2018 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!