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  • My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

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    Old 09-10-2011, 11:09 AM   #1
    dana27's Avatar
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    My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    We married out of love, we were just 20 years old. Now, 7 years later, I am contemplating divorce. All my husband does all day long is talk about conspiracy theories (things like: 9/11 is an inside job, there's concentration camps being build in the US, the chemtrails are there to make us all dumb, fluoride is put in the water to control our brains so we can be more easily be manipulated, the world economy will crash, we must move in an area with lots of land so we can grow our own food, etc).

    My husband dedicates all day and night to this stuff. I am feeling alone in everything. He doesn't help me at all with any household duties. I do everything, from shopping, cleaning, cooking, to paying the bills, etc. When I tell him that, he's saying he's actually doing a lot of work by keeping us informed through his research. My husband is failing his graduate school because he doesn't study since he's busy "researching" all the horrible things that he says will happen. He has no ambition and no goals and tells me he's not a "sheep" of the elites/New world order.

    I'm just 27 but feel much older. He makes everything in life gloomy, there's nothing to look forward to. We can't have a normal conversation, we can't go and enjoy a nice day, we can't do anything without him talking of this stuff. I feel depressed, very depressed. I was a happy girl but now I can't recognize myself. I've told him for many, many times that I don't want to hear these things and that I need him to be a supportive, hard working husband, but he tells me that I'm just a "sheep" who needs to be taken out of the fairy-tale land in which I live. Sometimes he gets mad and yells and swears seeing how "ignorant" I am. It's gotten to the point where I don't want to be near him anymore because I already know what he'll be talking about. Home should be a place where one can relax and feel good but for me it's no longer like that.

    I'm thinking of filing for divorce. I tell myself this is not how life should be. I've lived in a family in which my parents helped and respected each other. I don't trust my husband to father my children. He told me he'll make sure to "open the eyes" of his future children by telling them what's happening in the world. I'm thinking he'll rob them of their childhood and innocence and make their lives miserable and I don't want that to happen.

    He refuses any form of therapy. He thinks most people are ignorant and under no circumstance does he believe he's wrong in anything.

    Has anyone faced such a situation? I'd very much appreciate your help.

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    Old 09-28-2011, 06:39 PM   #2
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    I say go talk to an attorney to find out your rights for spousal support thing is for sure, any obsession only gets worse....the other issue you will have to deal with is his obsession and conspiracy problem, that is a mental illness....

    and what I know about divorce and mental illness is that many times it pushes them over the if this is what you are going to do, make sure you are not in their presence and do not allow for anyone to give out your address etc...

    I had a relative that had a horrible thing happen when she sought separation from someone who had conspiracy was really bad, he didn't make it through, she did, her life was never the same, and now she is no longer here...the whole ordeal shortened her life, that much I am sure of...

    But do you go through life without any intervention? of course not.....he needs to get help immediately....and you need to attempt to have him get the help so that you not only insure his safety but your own......

    take my advice to the bank, and they will give you cash....good luck with your decision...and don't keep this to yourself any about it with anyone who will listen....

    Old 10-08-2011, 03:45 PM   #3
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    Gee are we married to the same man? It really sounds like you are describing my husband. It started about 2 years ago and has just gotten to be progressively worse. He thinks everything even the weather is being controlled by something. He really has taken the joy out of life for me. I am such and upbeat person, but this is insanity. I believe that our government isn't always the best, but I am not going to sit and just be frantic about all the worldly thing going on. If my husband put as much effort into our relationship as he does this conspiracy crap, we might have a great marriage.
    I've been with him 12 years and I really just don't know what to say about this one. I understand where you are coming from.

    Old 04-29-2012, 04:53 PM   #4
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    I see this is an old post. Maybe you can give some advice as I am dealing with this same situation. I think it's worse since its 2012 but he's completely obsessed. If you're still dealing with this, I'd love to hear how things have been!

    Old 06-06-2012, 10:46 AM   #5
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    I think I am in same boat, only with children. My husband is on the computer all the time, I thought he had a girlfriend but now know he is only on [deleted].
    He believes all that conspiracy crap totally! I cant believe he can be so gullible. He is impossible to talk to about anything. He says I am picking on him if I disagree or ask where he got some information from.
    Yesterday he starts spouting Nazi stuff! I dont know who he is anymore. He hates everybody. He picks fights with salesmen and waiters.
    I cant find a job to support my kids, only part time work, and feel trapped.
    I wonder if he is dangerous. He hasnt done anything but I worry he is going to buy guns or already has.
    He is without friends and if I leave with the kids will he freak out and come after us?
    He sleeps in his own room.

    <removed inappropriate comment>

    This is a nightmare. He is such a problem we dont have one friend. I dont have anyone to talk to. He moved us down to Texas, and I have no support.

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    Old 06-21-2012, 12:16 PM   #6
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    I have a similar problem. My boyfriend keeps saying things like Promeeetheus in a geek voice. He makes me watch videos of ships sinking and planes crashing. He also said that when I die he will dedicate his life to looking for aliens. I think this is the start of something bad, should I get out now?

    Old 06-24-2012, 09:06 PM   #7
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    Well, it's been a few months and I think things have calmed down. He still insists the gov't is corrupt, which, duh, we all know. But either he feels silly for believing it or is just not going to act like it's ALL "gonna go down" this week, then next week. He just looked silly after a while. But he knew I was tired of hearing it so he hadn't really brought it up much lately, but now he's back overseas. I hope work will keep him busy enough that he can focus on more real life things. I think maybe it means they are lost when they latch onto something and get crazy about it. I think frustrations with how certain things in their lives turn out leave them feeling disappointed and looking for something. So from this experience so far, if it's worth it, wait it out and let them figure it out on their own. I was afraid it was a break down, but I think it was just a bump in the road. (fingers crossed) I have a family to think about and I don't want a rough patch mentally in his life to take it all away. He's not insane, but I do think he is depressed. I hope to stay and keep a close watch and not get distracted by life and pay attention to him. He needs support even if its not believing in this crap. So I'm not trying to advise anyone. Just sharing how this has worked out for me. If it's not over, I'll share, but I just figured seeing the other end will let you know possibly how it may work out for you. If you feel unsafe, leave and go somewhere safe, and don't have a confrontation if you can help it. But it could just be somethign they are going through and you can love them through it. Best of luck to everyone!

    Old 06-25-2012, 08:06 PM   #8
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    Re: My husband is obsessed with conspiracy theories - Contemplating divorce

    Sounds like mental illness- my husband is on the schizophrenic spectrum - but in my case fortunate as he figured this out before he met me and when I met him he was already medicated. In saying that- he still has his severe moments- and the paranoia can really take the wind out of my sails, and leave me in a constant state of anxiety. Once he gets meds adjusted and starts feeling better- he is back to "normal". At least not so paranoid- but still can be very depressive personality- however, a brilliant mind, and hardworking (while on meds). Have you ever seen the movie: Beautiful Mind? Check it out.

    Being married to someone with a severe mental illness is no joke. 16 years into my marriage I am beginning to realize (finally) the toll this has taken on me and my commitment and loyalty to him has often been met with suspicion and sarcasm- add to that he drinks heavily and is often withdrawn and wants to just be by himself

    We are currently seeing a marriage counselor- hope it helps. I'm hanging in there for now because he's a good man.

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