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please help. anorexic boyfriend?

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Old 02-05-2008, 12:08 AM   #1
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blue712 HB User
please help. anorexic boyfriend?

i am in need of some advice. i think that my boyfriend may be anorexic. he claims that he is not but he certainly does exhibit anorexic-like symptoms. these include: poor self esteem, negative body image/appearance, bouts of depression, unusually large quantity of shedding hair (though maybe due to thick curly hairtype?), perfectionist tendencies/school performance, and fatigue. i rarely see him eat, and when he does he will usually eat soup or on occasion a muffin (but never in front of me). the only time i ever witness him eat solid food is when we are at his home with his family for dinner, as his mother had threatened to hospitalize him if he refused food. but the portions he serves himself are always significantly smaller than everyone elses. i am not sure if these are significant signs of an eating disorder especially because he doesnt seem to be so preoccupied with weight that he cannot take in such high calorie drinks as alcohol or milk shakes. yet, wouldnt a typical anorexic be more likely to eat healthy food and calorie count? nor does he seem to have any food rituals. also, he doesnt really exercise routinely, but he does walk obscenely great distances and refuses to take any sort of public transportations even in the coldest conditions. despite such practices, he doesnt appear to be underweight, he actually seems quite average. he even expressed to me once that he feels fat. i am so concerned. i love him so much and i want him to be happy and healthy. does he have an eating disorder? it is hard for me to confront him about it, i am not sure if that is even the best thing to do. i dont know if i would be helping or hurting, and i know he gets a lot of **** from his his family and friends for not eating, i dont want to be another source of strain. what should i do? how can i help. thank you so much for any advice.

Last edited by blue712; 02-05-2008 at 01:24 AM.

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Old 02-05-2008, 09:17 AM   #2
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: princeton, nj
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honeydew310 HB User
Re: please help. anorexic boyfriend?

Yeah, that definitely sounds like an eating disorder. If I were you, I would talk to him and/or get him help.


Old 02-07-2008, 09:18 PM   #3
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sweetsourcat HB User
Re: please help. anorexic boyfriend?

I was anorexic at 15. Typical kind where you know it is anorexia. I never had therapy for it and nobody hardly even noticed even though i was severely underweight. I got "better" and ate much like your boyfriend does. I did that for the better part of 17 years before I had a super stressful year and went "extreme" again.

I am almost 33 years old and have had an eating disorder for more than half my life now. I even had myself convinced what I ate was normal.

I know now that it was not normal... please get him some help. He has a problem.

Old 02-14-2008, 01:24 PM   #4
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 1,082
hopesprings2 HB User
Re: please help. anorexic boyfriend?

sounds like a problem
however maybe he could see a doctor and get back on track real soon
since he eats at family gatherings he might still beable to eat
maybe he is scared or nervous to eat in front of you?Or maybe he is affraid you think hes fat.

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