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  • Love to eat, hate my body :( Im addicted to food...

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    Old 07-29-2009, 12:54 PM   #1
    MarineWifey
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    Unhappy Love to eat, hate my body :( Im addicted to food...

    Hi! SO i overeat, like really overeat. I eat when im happy, sad, bored, mad, whatever. I can eat more than my whole family at the table combined. I get full, but i keep eating like i will never be able to eat again. I have gone as far as made up lies to leave the house, drive to multiple fast food places scarf down food, throw away the bags, and come home like nothing ever happened. Its like im having an affair with food! When im cooking dinner I will eat while im cooking to make sure i have the biggest portion...whats wrong with me?! I can down a huge bag of chips while watching my fav tv show then act as if i dont know where the chips went, or make an excuse that there were ants in them or whatever and i threw them away. Its so lame to lie & hide then feel quitly, ashamed of this. I hate my body! I hate having to hide this horrible addiction i have. I have health problems like pcos/insulin resistance which makes everything even worse and i have gained 100lbs in the last few years. Everytime i get on the right track, i will move from eating obsession to weightloss obsession. If i dont loose x amount of weight i get depressed and find a way to sabotage myself and binge eat again. Right now im on the right track, but i hate that food controls me. I feel when im eating healthy that im a prisoner because i cant have that food at olive garden, or in and out burger. Then i get depressed thinking i have to be happy eating then guilty & fat, or miserable getting thinner. Ugh! I have never ever admitted any of this, not even to my therapist lol, i guess i just needed to get it out there somehow. I dont know why im like this

     
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    Old 07-30-2009, 01:34 PM   #2
    Emalee129
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    Re: Love to eat, hate my body :( Im addicted to food...

    You are definitely not alone. I used to be bulimic and when I was able to stop that I thought I was healthy but really I just replaced it with binge eating without the purging. I have also gained about 100 pounds in the last few years. I have also made my self things to eat before even eating a meal and I'd stop at fast food restaurants on my way to get dinner and follow dinner up with ice cream. I would get full but like you, that doesn't seem to stop me either. Food is my addiction and quite honestly, the thing I look forward to every day is eating. I know this is no way to live but I fear I will never have a healthy relationship with food. My friends and family think I was just born with a bottomless pit of a stomach but the truth is that I make it that way and eat things in excess even if it makes me physically ill. It's really sad and I know exactly what you are going through.

     
    Old 07-30-2009, 03:16 PM   #3
    MarineWifey
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    Re: Love to eat, hate my body :( Im addicted to food...

    I do the same...look forward to eating. I hate it! Im always moody when im eating healthy bland food and not what I want to eat. It controls me and I feel so weak in that way. When ever I do go out and people ask where we should go I always suggest some restraunt. Im scared to even leave my house because im so tempted to binge on anything and everything. Like last night I went to my gmas house to visit with her. Shes southern and make all this fried food full of carbs and fat. I DID NOT give in. Then I was offered ice cream & cookies, and again I did NOT give in. But Then my mom and I went to the fast food place to pick up something for my dad, and I got a chicken sandwhich, was just going to eat it on some lettuce no bun, but did that happen nope i downed the whole thing. Plus snuk some of my kids fries and they accidently gave us a fish taco, and i ate that too. Today I was depressed, slept til noon, and first thing i did was get on the scale to see im up 4 pounds. I know i shouldnt dwell on it but i do, i obsess. So im feling moody today and like crap and i could have avoided it all by just not giving in to bad food. I just hate that my day "out" is filled with sayin no to the things (food) that make me happy. I need to find something else to make me happy or Im never going to be able to "get over" food.

     
    Old 10-27-2009, 05:34 PM   #4
    dreaminggrandma
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    Re: Love to eat, hate my body :( Im addicted to food...

    Hello! I have just found this board so I may not get a reply but I want you to know that your post sounded just like ME !! If you still want to chat with someone that is right where you were in July when you posted then please give me a hollar ! I am a 57 year old grandma that dreams of bringing my addiction under control and being under 200 pounds just once more before I leave this ole earth ! I have weighed over 200 sence I was 18 and now at 57 I am really suffering from carring all this weight around for so long ! Hope to hear from you soon!==Wanda==

    Last edited by mod-anon; 10-27-2009 at 11:31 PM. Reason: Please use the Quick Reply button instead of Quote Reply.

     
    Old 11-23-2009, 12:14 PM   #5
    cloud hopper
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    Re: Love to eat, hate my body :( Im addicted to food...

    omg dreaminggrandma, that is my story except im 47. i just wish there was something i could do to stop this craziness.

     
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