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Nonjudgmental advice appreciated

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Old 02-25-2011, 07:10 PM   #1
Join Date: Feb 2011
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TaliaGonzalez HB User
Nonjudgmental advice appreciated

Hi. I'm new, and this is the first time I've tried this through an internet setting. Not really sure what to expect. I used to be bulimic/anorexic back in Sept.- November, and then my body started shutting down. I had my friends sort of support, they tried to avoid the issue but would ask if I was OK. I managed to stop in December or face getting fired, but now it's come back hardcore.

I work 3 jobs right now- 2 cooking (which pays nothing), and a third as an exotic dancer, so I can pay off everything I owe.

Sometimes I'm not sure if dancing has affected me mentally. Dancing in itself never makes me feel bad, or ashamed, or anything of the sort, but I've been a lot more mentally unstable since I started....the bulimia, depression, sort of splitting myself up into different people depending on whether I'm in the kitchen or the club or with my friends.

Here's my question. I think I could go back to eating healthy and normally if I could go to the gym a lot, and sleep a decent amount, and make sure I eat all my meals w friends so I can't purge after. Working as a chef is my dream, and my job cooking is one of the few things that truly makes me happy, but it makes all those things difficult. We have to taste everything we make, which makes me really uncomfortable a lot, and if I don't eat while I'm there it's rare anybody notices bc we are so busy. If I just worked as a dancer for now and part time in a catering company, I think I would be unhappy, but at least probably eating healthy and able to have healthy habits/schedule. At the same time though, is it wise to pretty much starting dancing full time, when thats what (probably) began all this?

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Old 03-01-2011, 04:35 PM   #2
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Re: Nonjudgmental advice appreciated

You got to do what is in the best interest for you. Stopping the ED ought to really be your first priority though. Because if you don't you will end up having serious health complications due to the ED. Sounds like you are a hard worker , and that is all fine. i just know that sooner or later the ED will catch up to you, and you will not have enough energy anymore to even work at all.

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