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I Finally Admit It To Myself

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Old 05-19-2011, 10:18 PM   #1
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: toronto
Posts: 5
seeker04 HB User
I Finally Admit It To Myself

I have posted a message in this forum before which was sayin that i don't think i'm bulimic, i'm just tryin to control my food intake.

Well i dont know if i have already had an ED back then when i posted "Do You Think I'm Having An ED?", but all i want to say right now is that, i've been binge and purging since abot 3 or more weeks ago. and i just did that this morning. and i have the urge to do that again this evening which i know that i shouldnt, but i really want to. so yeah, I AM BULIMIC.

i dont know why am i writing this thing here right now, i should be studying actually, cause tomorrow i'll be having an examination of a very very hard subject and although i'm not denying anymore that i'm having an ED, but i still dont think that i'm on the stage where i need some sort of help.

so i dont know why i'm here now, maybe i just feel like that i want to share. i'll catch up with you guys later.

note: if you read my post of "Do You Think I'm Having An ED?", i was askin about the menstruation period. i just went to gynecologist yesterday, turns out that the structures of my ovaries are bad, and i didnt release any egg, so i should be treated, it is curable. there was one point when my mom asked the doctor: is this because of any eating habit? (what she meant is that my diet, cause i've been losing weight. oh, and right now i'm 151cm and 45 kg). and the doctor said: no, it's not.

~ xo joey

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Old 06-04-2011, 12:57 AM   #2
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Uk
Posts: 5
Willow84 HB User
Re: I Finally Admit It To Myself

Firstly, let me say for ur weight/height u must have an amazing body. U should know that and digest it as a compliment. Know that u cannot be physically fat so if mentally u are telling urself that u don't like what u see then u need to reflect on that as the root of ur problem. If ur happy with the way u look- that's amazing! Maintenance doesn't have to take over ur life.

Now if u have only recently started purging PLEASE stop!!! It will take over ur life and u will soon not have any control. U do now so don't allow it.

I average with around 3000 calories a binge and I thought for years I had the secret to calorie free eating. Actually only 30%, 50% at max comes back up if u are six (and that's within the hour. Even less after) and a mere 10% if u use laxatives (and abuse ur body forever killing ur digestive system )

So my point is, binging makes u gain alot of weight. If u do ur own food shop don't buy these things. Write a list of what u needand don't budge from that list. No matter if any special offers! If not keep a food diary. Highlight any regrettable foods in pink (pink for think) and manage these over the days/weeks.

Hope this helps. I cannot stress enough how imperative it is that u take control and stop the binging.

Old 06-04-2011, 08:40 AM   #3
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: nicosia, cyprus
Posts: 349
thaliak HB Userthaliak HB Userthaliak HB Userthaliak HB Userthaliak HB Userthaliak HB User
Re: I Finally Admit It To Myself

Finally admitting it to yourself is the first step in the right direction.
Try and think about why you are doing it. Once you recognize the reason(s) you will be able to avoid the triggers.
Are you scared you will put on weight? Do you think you are fat? ( Because you are not). Have you been eating/ binging because you are stressed and need confort?
Whatever it is, you must be mature about it and try to deal with it before it becomes serious and you seriously damage your health, your stomach, your teeth, your oisophagous and ultimately your life.
I have been through this when I was a teenager and on and off for years and it really isn't good. I binge because I feel quilty for eating. You see, I do not think that I deserve to eat something nice and that I am not good enough for it. But at least, knowing this, I have managed to control binging to about once a month or less and I try to avoid the causes. In any case, every time I binge and purge, I break a whole lot of capilaries on my face and especially around my eyes. So, you see it is a road you do not want to take.
Please dont.

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