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Body Dysmorphia affecting my life

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Old 06-08-2012, 06:32 AM   #1
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jordanh2012 HB User
Unhappy Body Dysmorphia affecting my life

I have been diagnosed with BDD and it's had a huge impact on my life. I cannot even leave the house some days because I feel so ugly I am literally terrified that people will throw up if they see me. I can't even wear the clothes I like anymore because I feel like I look so fat in them it makes me sick to my stomach. I have to load my face up with makeup because even though it does not FIX the problem it still helps.

About 3 years ago I lost 200 lbs (I was 350 before.) All my life my mom gave me such a hard time about being ugly and overweight, saying things like nobody would love me because I was so fat and ugly. To lose the weight I began my battle with bulimia and dieting pills. Since I lost all the weight I feel like when I look in the mirror I gained weight instead of losing it.

In the morning it takes me around 3 hours to get ready. I have to wear so much bronzer and tanners that it's becoming ridiculous. People say I do not need makeup but I feel like I could just cry when they say that. I feel trapped in my own body. If I do not wear makeup it is like my world is going to end. People just do not understand that when they make fun of me. Without the makeup I am a worthless, ugly, fat unhappy human being who does not deserve to live and be happy.

This has to stop, it is literally ruining my life and any self confidence I may have left. Someone please help me if you have any ideas about how to gain self confidence and get over this.

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Phoenix (06-08-2012)
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Old 06-08-2012, 11:53 AM   #2
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Re: Body Dysmorphia affecting my life

Hello jordanh2012,

It appears that the issues you were facing before and whilst losing weight have yet to be addressed.

Have you thought about seeing a therapist;particularly an eating disorder specialist?

The unresolved issues will continue to remain an underlying cause,until they are at least attempted to be worked upon.

Success,with respect to eating disorders and their subcomponents,should be measured in increments.

What took some time to develop is going to require adequate time and effort on your part to help recover from.

It can be done and you can do it.

Respectfully stated
When in doubt, post it out.

Last edited by Phoenix; 06-08-2012 at 11:55 AM.

Old 07-01-2012, 10:52 AM   #3
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Re: Body Dysmorphia affecting my life

i feel you i also cover my face in make up and try on clothes for hours before i can leave the house and many days i dont leave the house becuz i feel so ugly and my face is covered in acne scars i have to cake tons of foundation on it and i hate my hair i just hate the way i look and no matter what anyone says i feel so ugly your mom was mean to you and made you feel like this my mom gave me lots of crap about my acne when i was younger and kids made fun of me real bad in school i dont know what to do either

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