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Off the deep end?

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Old 02-20-2005, 07:26 PM   #1
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 167
tiresome HB User
Off the deep end?

Okay folks here goes: I think I have finally gone off the deep end. I have had these weird things happening. First let me tell you that I have been dx with Partial Complex Epilepsy. I have been on Dilantin and Trileptal, still had seizures, visual disturbances and chest pains. My neuro switched me to Lamictal. I am still on the start up package. I see my neuro tomorrow and am going to talk to him about this because I chickened out the last time. I am afraid I am really losing it. A few times I have felt this but friday was just horrible, I was writing a letter when I looked up from it and all of a sudden I felt like I was in the wrong apartment. I mean really the wrong apartment, and I felt so scared. I had to talk myself into calmming down and telling myself that the pictures on the wall were mine, the couch was mine, the table ect. so I had to be in the right apartment. It was so powerful and I just cannot explain how awful it was.

I have decided to talk to Dr. N no matter what, because this time was so bad. I felt it before but could just shrug it off. I hope he doesn't lock me up and throw away the key . I feel a little better just admitting it, I have kept it secret for so long. But I trust you guys, do you think I have gone off the deep end? Is this what they call a psychotic episode? Or maybe a halucination? I know that between the anti-seizure drugs and the drugs I take for depression and neck pain I have a whole pharmacy just about.
Just when I think I am finally getting used to the weird feelings I get from the seizures something new pops up. Well not exactly new, just worse than eveer before.
Thanks for letting me confide in you. Please if you have any ideas reply soon. Maybe someone can tell me what is going on.

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Old 02-20-2005, 09:23 PM   #2
Join Date: Oct 2004
Posts: 53
DianaF HB User
Re: Off the deep end?

I have a similiar thing happen right before my seizure starts. Things look different and distorted.

Do you have a seizure after this happens? Maybe it is a wierd aura.

I would definetely check with your doctor about the meds you are taking. I don't know about you, but I have strange side effects from certain meds.

I wish you well tomorrow.


Old 02-21-2005, 02:07 PM   #3
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tiresome HB User
Re: Off the deep end?

DianaF thank you for your reply. Yes I guess from talking to the neuro that this is "normal" for me. Sure didn't feel normal LOL. Usually I have that deja vu feeling. Used to think I ought to learn how to read palms I had it so often. I guess what I was experiencing was the opposite. Can't remember the name of it. I guess the reason I had it so strong is because I had seizures friday, saturday, and sunday. The good news is I am not going crazy and will not be locked up (not yet anyway) although he discussed my not driving anymore until we get it under control almost a year of meds with no control yet.
We also discussed the bouts of unreasonable anger I get after seizures and the fact that when I ride in a car I am so jumpy about every little thing and scare easily. Do you have that too? Again thanks for the reply, you helped me.

Old 03-01-2005, 04:50 AM   #4
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 3
GoAwayEpi HB User
Re: Off the deep end?

I have never posted on these boards, but I really needed to find a place where somone could understand what I am having....I have the same experience as you do and I have taking topomax and then was switched to Lamictal. I was DX 3 years ago with this crap...and I read your post and cried because I feel the same way...I feel like I am going to go off the deep end...I hope this helps you know that you are not alone.


Old 03-01-2005, 11:47 AM   #5
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tiresome HB User
Re: Off the deep end?

Thanks Allison, yes it does help to know that other people expeirence the same thing. It helps to know that I am not alone and perhaps not "crazy" as other people with epilepsy suffer from the same weird things.
I have looked everywhere for people who expeirence the "shock" or "wave" feeling I get in my brain before a seizure. So far doctors say it is because I also suffer from severe depression that I feel this "thing". That people with depression "feel things more" than people who don't.
I am going to be scheduled for a 4-day video study to find out what type or kind of seizures I have as no drugs have stopped them yet. . I am just hoping for the day that doctors quit with the "maybes" and can give me some real help.

Old 03-29-2005, 08:30 AM   #6
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 4
Stormey HB User
Re: Off the deep end?

I've had this too. The first time is was very frightening. It sounds very much like what I have, classified as simple partials, and called Jamais Vu. Jamais vu is where the known is unknown, or unfamiliar. Really spooky. I get with that also a feeling of fear. Whether that's just from the experience of not knowing familiar things or whether it's a part of the sz? I'm not sure. I think it's a part of the sz - a feeling of panic and fear. Yea, makes you feel like you're crazy. BUT you're not.


Old 03-29-2005, 09:16 AM   #7
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Join Date: Feb 2005
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thinkimcrazy HB User
Re: Off the deep end?

I am new to having seizures and as of yet there does not seem to be a rhyme or reason. I am tired of embarrasing myself in public and feeling terrible all the time. It seems that every time that I have another one I bang something else on my body. My neck hurts so bad that I can't even hardly turn my head. I feel shaky at different times and I think that I am going to have one but somehow I feel like "I will it away". Is that possible? I am on 300mg of Dilantin as of Friday 3/18/05. It seemed like it was beginning to help and then here we go again, right here at work in front of half of my co-workers. I was humiliated. It only lasted about 30 seconds but I had just had one when I had gone to wash my hands in the restroom. This is absolutely driving me crazy, hence my name. I am very depressed. I want my normal life back. I'm not driving now and it really stinks. I have to keep working because I can't afford not to. I don't understand these feelings physically that I keep having. My body hurts all over. Now I have these knots that have come up on the left side of my neck. And the doctors seem to take forever to look over tests.

Sorry, I guess I just had to vent. I'm trying to get all the information that I can get.

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