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  • What leads to binge drinking?

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    Old 04-14-2004, 05:18 AM   #1
    NickName
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    Unhappy What leads to binge drinking?

    I have a few questions about binge drinking.

    Say a person drinks for 2 days straight, getting completely drunk and causing problems... every 4 months or so. Is that person considered an alcoholic?

    Would that person benefit from AA?
    Should that person go to a rehab clinic?
    What kind of things can trigger a binge?
    Is there a way for a binge drinker to completely recover?

    Last edited by NickName; 04-14-2004 at 05:18 AM.

     
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    Old 04-14-2004, 06:41 AM   #2
    lane7eir
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    HEY-
    in answer to your questions-
    this person could be an alcoholic. can they tell themselves they can stop after a couple and follow thru on that? I know i can't.
    anything can trigger a binge. I drank b/c things in life were good(celebration). I drank when things were bad (from my perspective). I also drank just b/c it was friday (or monday or tuesday, etc.)
    AA has saved my life. it's not just about drinking. it's how to live your life on life's terms without taking a drink. my life is better than it was when i was out there drinking. not every day is "perfect" but that is life. alcohol generally exacerbated any life problem i had. with that out of the mix, my problems are of a different quality than they were.
    hope this helps!
    laney

     
    Old 04-14-2004, 07:32 AM   #3
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    No, he can't stop after one or two, but he takes breaks inbetween the binges for about 3 to 4 months.

     
    Old 04-14-2004, 07:43 AM   #4
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    to me, that would be signs of addiction. does your friend get in trouble when he drinks? like, DUIs, does stupid things, have blackouts, ignores personal responsibilities (ie: only cares about getting wasted, misses work/ school)? during my drinking career, i drove drunk (never got caught) with my child in the car, called out sick at work, blacked out, alienated my friends and family. at the same time, i wondered why i was so miserable and consequently drank because of that feeling. totally insanity. nothing changes if nothing changes.
    how open is this person to discussing their habits and actions while he is drunk? does he see binging as an issue or as "everyone does this/"? one major thing to remember is no matter how badly YOU want them to change, you can not fix them. (i know. i tried so hard with my husband).

     
    Old 04-14-2004, 07:55 AM   #5
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    He is willing to admit that he has a problem while he's drunk, but not as much when he's sober and embarassed.

    He does stupid irresponsible things when he's drunk.

    He is the kind of person to say whatever it will take to get someone off his back.

    SO does this person need AA or a rehab clinic?

    Last edited by NickName; 04-14-2004 at 08:03 AM.

     
    Old 04-14-2004, 08:13 AM   #6
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    i did that. i would call my friends and cry about what an alkie i was when i was drunk, but would be furious at them when they would call me a lush. i constantly tried to be what i thought everyone else expected me to be (good wife, mom, daughter, friend). know what? all anyone wanted was for me to be happy and to stop killing myself. the big thing for me today is not trying to be "perfect" whatever that is and accept myself for what i am, warts and all.
    i always had the answer and would say whatever i thought you wanted me to say just to get you off my back. i knew deep down, that i was lying and only kidding myself. hopefully, your friend will get to that point. i don't know when that will be. all i know is it took a while for me. i knew i was a drunk 15 years ago, but i justified my behavior-everyone else does it. actually, everyone else was not doing it. i am grateful and lucky i didn't die or physically hurt or kill someone else. i have put my friends and family through emotional hell. i am trying to make amends for that now. i can't change the past, but i sure as hell can not live it again.

     
    Old 04-15-2004, 12:56 AM   #7
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    Any number of things lead to binge drinking. Stress, low level depression, association with crowd that does like wise. The truth of the matter is that this is a common problem for many people. The term "alcoholic" is not a medical term but more of a "folk term." AA is certainly not for everyone and neither should it be. It could be that the person doing the binge drinking maybe addicted to the experience of being drunk from time to time.

    The problem with AA is that it simply does not fit every model and does not always help. Many people that have gone through AA including myself at one time continue to drink. Unfortunately the program of AA addresses this by merely saying that one is "not working the program." The truth of the matter some people in AA that continue to drink sometimes need to look at other alternatives.

    Finally binge drinking could be the result of mere irresponsible behavior. Sometimes a binge drinker of an addictive drinker for that matter can sometimes stop by merely incorporating just a new set of values that contradicts addictive drinking. Sometimes it is merely deciding to change the friends one associates with. However sometimes AA is needed and one would benefit alot from the moral support from such a program

     
    Old 04-15-2004, 04:59 AM   #8
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    Thanks, everyone. This guy seems to drink every time his wife is away. Maybe he feels like he needs to get away with something, since she's incredibly overbearing.

     
    Old 07-14-2004, 09:14 AM   #9
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    Lane, you've just described me to a T. Do you think that AA is enough to get through this? For all intents and purposes, it's both my DH and I that do this. I can't seem to find an AA meeting in my area, although I can honestly say that having to find one that I can bring my kids to is not going to be easy.

    Thanks

     
    Old 07-15-2004, 05:55 AM   #10
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    hi kid-
    i was just browsing through before i leave to get some work done and saw your note. i've shared before at aa meetings that at first i wanted them to show me how to drink like a lady (prove to me that i am not like y'all). a few years ago, i wasn't willing to understand that that's not it. when i came back and got miserable enough, all i wanted was to be happy. i knew my drinking and behavior was the cause. trouble was, i had no idea how to stop. the biggest hurdle is getting to that point. i certainly did not like the idea that i was not in control of everything. i used to play games with myself like, "i'll only have 2 glasses of wine while i cook dinner. if i can do that then i'm not an alcoholic." NEVER HAPPENED! i always finished off the bottle and headed out for more. it finally got to the point that i drank no matter what (happy, sad, good day, bad day, etc). physically,. i was tired. mentally, i was tired of all the excuses i had to make to myself, family, and coworkers. deep down, you know when you've had enough.
    In 2 months, by the grace of god, following the advice of my aa friends, and working the 12 steps of aa, i will have been sober for a year. however, this will only happen if i continue to do what has been proven to work for me every day. today, i try not to worry about tomorrow. each day, the most important thing i do is not drink today. just today. i could go on and on about how my life is different today. one of the biggest gifts is that i love myself and through loving and having respect for myself, i can give that away to others.
    as for finding an aa meeting, check your local listings for an aa hotline. i am fortunate that where i live there are over 300 meetings per week.
    oh yeah, if your dh has issues too, try to remember, you can't change him, only yourself.
    laney

     
    Old 07-15-2004, 05:57 AM   #11
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    oh yeah, kid-
    you can take your kids to any open meeting where friends and family are welcome. i have taken my 3 year old lots of times.

     
    Old 07-15-2004, 07:05 AM   #12
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    Laney, thanks for your insight. It definitely describes what is going on in my head. I've made it 4 days so far, but during the week is not the problem. It's the weekends. I used to tell myself it was to "destress," but as you know now, it's the cause of the stress...not the stress releiver.) I've at least come to realize that and that it needs to stop; for my kids, my health/weight, and my sanity. I'll check for an AA hotline..thanks!
    Sue

     
    Old 07-15-2004, 12:17 PM   #13
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    Re: What leads to binge drinking?

    I have to say that, as a parent, you have to do whatever you have to do to make sure your kids are in a healthy environment. For some of us, like myself, I have VERY LITTLE TO NO help when it comes to getting someone to watch my kids to go to a doctor's appoiintment, let alone AA meetings as often as necessary. My DH works 75 hours a week, and by the time he gets home he has enough time to have a snack and fall asleep on the couch. I also take care of my disabled mother along with my 3 kids. FOr me, the choice is to either find a meeting that you can bring kids to, or continue on my destructive path.

    As far as I have heard, and I hope it is true, there are meetings that you can bring your kids to because there are people there to watch them in another room while the meeting goes on.

    Every situation is not the same, and we shouldn't judge others for doing what they feel needs to be done for their own personal reasons. Isn't it safer for the children to be at an AA meeting than at home running around while the parent(s) are drinking themselves into another dimension???

     
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