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  • My son and Xanax

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    Old 07-22-2004, 08:30 PM   #1
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    My son and Xanax

    My son is almost 19, just moved out on his own...likes to take Xanax...told me that 6 months ago, he had gone thru withdrawal from Xanax...explained how bad he felt. His friends had told me they thought he was taking an awful lot of them and they thought he had a problem. Well, he quit as he said. But about a month ago, he came home and he had been taking them, like we couldn't tell. He said that was the 1st time tin a long time that he had taken any at all. He promised me that he would never take another one. I mean a real promise so I thought.....He called me Saturday night from jail. (never been there before) said he got arrested for shoplifting a CD from Best Buy. He had $120 in his pocket...had just bought a cell phone and stole a CD in a store that has cameras all over the ceiling.........WOW..........I got down there and he bonded out....had a long talk witiht he bonds man and the guy that arrested him (along with 2 girls) one of the girls had Xanax in her purse without a prescription...she was charged with a felony. As my son was sitting there talking to me and the bondsman, the bondsman was filling out all the paperwork and I was looking at my son, his eyes were closing, drooping, just like a Xanax high. So I knew he had taken some. I asked him about it when he got in the car and he said no. I said ok, we're going by the ER and you will be tested. Then he admitted to taking 2 bars earlier. I was disgusted.

    I asked him how he could steal something like that? He's never been accused of stealing my knowledge.......he said he thinks it was the Xanax because he knows what a stupid thing to do. He said I would never have done such a thing sober.......So what do I do? I am at my witts end. I don't believe anything he tells me. I wish I had not gone and picked him up. Oh, I didn't put any money down for bond, he used his last dollar for that. But I wish I had left him there.........what's a mom to do??

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    Old 07-23-2004, 05:28 AM   #2
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    Re: My son and Xanax

    This is not uncommon-stealing/and xanax(benzos)-this might sound strange-but i know someone-who when he took benzos stole from stores.
    He would go to shops and take things-to see if could get away w/ it..
    This person is now 4 yrs clean-and in NA..he explained that when he took benzos he would get the urge to steal..
    Im not defending his actions-but drugs do have a way of causing behaviors you probably would NEVER do sober..
    I think you did the right thing-first time incident-you bailed your son out-hes 19-
    I also am the mother of a 19 yr. old boy-we've been thru many problems over the years due to ADHD/mood disorder-plus alcohol issues.
    He has finally after several years on/off probation for alcohol related issues-has made a huge turnaround-works full time(over a yr. now)-takes prescribed antidepressants for his depression-and is maturing/..sigh...the last time he was arrested for possesion of beer-he was an adult-i stuck w/ him thru those teenage years-dealing w/ probation officers appts/therapists/drs./school issues/ as an adult-he was to handle the probation/fees/etc..on his own-and he did..i refuse to enable him-as an adult-but in your case-first time..totally understandable.
    Stick to your guns-if you see him getting high-confront him-let him know-you know-and its not acceptable-he'll have to seek treatment.
    If we play dumb-it just gets worse-there is a way to be supportive/w/o alienating them-
    You sound like a very caring mom-you did the right thing-now you got to back it up-
    Its not easy-but its doable..

    Old 07-23-2004, 09:01 PM   #3
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    Re: My son and Xanax

    what i can tell you right now that he has a problem, but as hardas it will be to deal with, there really isnt much you can do for him right now. he needs help for his problem, he needs support, which is probably the only thing you can offer him right now. you cant force a person to surrender - seek treatment, go to meeting etc. they hace to want to do it for themselves. he has to hit his rock bottom before he can start going up. when he hits his rock bottom, most likely he'll know it and he'll want to do something about it. and if you suppot him until he gets to that point, he will most likely come to you for help in which case you should take him to treatment, get him hooked up with some NA meetings and go from there. and by supporting him, dont give him money, EVER - he will use it for drugs. but support him morally. make sure he knows that you are there for him no matter what because there is nothing worse than wanting to get clean and having no one to support you, trust me, i know. i had no one when i was ready to get clean, completely alone and had never felt so much so in my life. but now i go to NA where i am surrounded by people who know what i am going through and they support me 110% and it gives me the strength to get through the day clean. hope i have helped and good luck, let us know how it goes and ask if you need any more help!

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