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I've lost Stan.....

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Old 06-13-2007, 12:05 AM   #1
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Location: Irvine, CA
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Kimslos HB UserKimslos HB UserKimslos HB UserKimslos HB User
I've lost Stan.....

Stan passed away this morning at 8:05am. It has been an overwhelming day in everyway. It was not an easy death at all, but nothing with Stan this last month has been easy. I was thankful the boys had just gotten to school as they told me they did not want to see their dad die. Hospice was at my house this morning at 6:00am changing the cartridge in his pump and she told me he was in transition and it would be a day or so. She left around 6:30am and so I called Hospice to inform them and they were in shock. I am numb, I am overwhelmed, I have a huge void and feel empty but with the love and support of all of our friends I will be okay....I must be for the boys! My house was full all day with people grocery shopping, dropping of desserts, flowers and anything else you could imagine. My friends know I have company starting to arrive tomorrow for Andrew's upcoming graduation so they wanted to make sure the house was full of food.
I have not slept in days so I will head to bed for now but wanted to thank all of you for your prayers, support and friendship. I do have comfort knowing Stan is no longer in pain and is safe and free from anymore pain.
Thank you my dear friends for helping me keep my chin up and keeping my faith.

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Old 06-13-2007, 02:59 AM   #2
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Location: Santa Barbara, California
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Janmarie2 HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Kim, My heart felt sympathies go out to you and the boys. I will be praying that you all find comfort in the coming days. Stan was certainly a fighter and I have a feeling many here on HB will feel the loss. I am also sorry to hear he did not have a peaceful exit but you are right nothing has been easy for you or him this past month. It is 2:45 Am and I am at work and once again got that feeling that I needed to come here so am being bad and getting on the internet to do so.

I am glad that you have had friends around to help you and that others will be arriving today. I do hope that you were able to get a good nights sleep. I do hope that Andrew is able to enjoy his graduation despite his dad's dieing as that is such a big day for him.He has a few days before graduation..correct? How is Anthony handing it? I will be thinking of you and sending lots of prayers your way .One of my ventilator patients is acting up so I have to go. (((((Big Cyberhug))))) for you. JanMarie

Old 06-13-2007, 03:56 AM   #3
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Welland, Ontario, Canada
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Ayre HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Oh I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Lots of support and hugs for you and your family.

Old 06-13-2007, 04:00 AM   #4
Join Date: Oct 2006
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cher1052 HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Kim, My thoughts and prayers are with you and the boys. I'm happy to hear that your friends/neighbors are there to help you. Stan was sure a fighter! I hope today is better. Peace, Cherie ((((hugs))))

Old 06-13-2007, 05:12 AM   #5
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Re: I've lost Stan.....

Oh Kim, I am so so sorry for your loss. My heartfelt thoughts and prayers are with you and your whole family. I pray for peace and comfort to be with you and the boys in the days and weeks to come. I am so glad you have a great support system there.
With Hugs,

Old 06-13-2007, 06:26 AM   #6
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conan1017 HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

My dear friend, Kim-

What do I say after these past months but I am truly sorry for your loss. I have heard those words spoken (sorry for your loss) all miy life, but it is not until now I know what "loss" really is. To lose a husband or wife while still having children to care and concern for is a double-heartbreak. Only those is tarvel that path can truly understand.

Stan was an amazing fighter. I remember the humorous momnents you shared and the good days you had, not to mention how he outlasted the oncs predictions. Let the boys be reminded of how hard he fought for them and for you. I know he will be greatly missed and remebered.

I don't want to offer an advice, but this one thing: Rest whenever and as often as you can. Did I do this? ...Not very well. But I think it has caught up to me lately and I have been having my worst days. The family and friends will help alot with the boys, just don't forget to take care of Kim becuase they will need you more when things return to normal. As many will tell you ...just take one day at a time ...and some days one step at a time.

Thanks you so much for sharing your Stan and yourself with us,


Old 06-13-2007, 07:40 AM   #7
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marjha62 HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Im new here but just to say how sorry I am to hear of your loss. My prays and thoughts are with you and family.

Old 06-13-2007, 08:05 AM   #8
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DaveInVA HB UserDaveInVA HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

I'd like to also offer my condolences, sorry he didn't go peaceably


Old 06-13-2007, 08:43 AM   #9
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snoopy63 HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Kim...I am so sorry for your loss but am glad that Stan is no longer suffering...I am sure things will be crazy for you for the next couple of days..I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers that you will have the strength to get through this transition....

what a bittersweet time ...the joy of graduation and the sadness of death...

Thank you for all the support you have given all of us and I truly hope you can see and feel how much love and support you are getting from us in return....


Old 06-13-2007, 09:34 AM   #10
Join Date: Jan 2006
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lorriem HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Kim I am so sorry to hear that Stan lost the battle. I do not post often on this site but I do read it everyday and your Stan was a fighter.My husband also has (had?) lung cancer and I cannot even think about what you are going through. My prayers are with you and your boys.

Old 06-13-2007, 10:38 AM   #11
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tadalaja HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Hello Kim, so sorry, my thoughts are with you and your boys. may god give you the strength to get through. Hugs and Prayers

Old 06-13-2007, 12:04 PM   #12
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courtenaynt HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

You're in my thoughts and prayers. You have been an inspiration to many and I know you helped a lot when my mom died. I hope you take comfort in that. And that your sadness is balanced with many wonderful memories of Stan.

Much love.

Old 06-13-2007, 02:37 PM   #13
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jeaniek HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

I am so very sorry to hear about Stan. I haven't been on the board in a while, but needed some inspiration and came here to read some of your posts. Thank you so much for sharing Stan's story with us, it has gotten me through some real difficult times with my father. As you mentioned, Stan is free and no longer in pain, as difficult it is to see someone battle cancer, I'm sure it's even tougher to let them go (I'm not ready for my dad to leave, but unfortunately that time is drawing near as well). Stan was a great fighter in this battle and gave hope to many of us here~
I'm sending lots of prayers and good wishes your way - Lots of love for you and your children at this time~

Last edited by jeaniek; 06-13-2007 at 06:39 PM.

Old 06-13-2007, 05:14 PM   #14
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postiemayer HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....

Dearest Kim, you know only too well that words cannot express the sorrow we feel on hearing of your loss. You and Stan will continue to be an inspiration to my husband and myself as I anticipate the winding down of my sweethearts life. I am so sorry Stan had to suffer. This thing, cancer, is just incredibly terrible.
Try and rest, rely on the family and friends that are showing up and know that we all love you and wish you peace.

Old 06-13-2007, 05:56 PM   #15
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: USA
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pbj11 HB User
Re: I've lost Stan.....


Words cannot begin to express my sympathy for the loss of your dear Stan. I pray that God will hold you and the kids close during this terrible time.

The courage that both of you have shown, and been willing to share so openly, is immensely appreciated. For those of us who are dealing with spouses who have lc, you have shone a light on the path for all of us on this journey.

May God bless you always.

With condolences,

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