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  • adult child of bipolar 2 Dad with a question

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    Old 04-25-2015, 04:44 PM   #1
    sweetpotato13
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    adult child of bipolar 2 Dad with a question

    My Dad was a good man but there have been instances in my childhood where he has behaved poorly and abusively and I have been psychologically scarred, because of it. Do I have any right to think that if he were medicated for all of those years that he would have acted differently? What's your opinion?

     
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    Old 05-09-2015, 11:54 PM   #2
    Indigo123
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    Re: adult child of bipolar 2 Dad with a question

    It sounds like your childhood was rough, and that you are angry (am I hearing that right?). I'm sorry that whatever happened happened. It can be tough to heal from scarring experiences in the past. You certainly have a "right" to feel angry. You have a right to think whatever you wish to think. I'll ask you a question though... If I were to agree that your father "should" have behaved differently (in whatever way)... would it change anything about what you feel or how you are trying to cope in the present?

    What are you hoping to hear? Whatever that is... do you know why you are hoping to hear that? I'm not saying you shouldn't ask what you're asking, or that you shoudn't be feeling whatever you're feeling. I'm just wondering if it would feel helpful to be able to define for yourself what it is you're wanting in asking the question you asked?

     
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    Old 05-11-2015, 06:39 PM   #3
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    Re: adult child of bipolar 2 Dad with a question

    Thank you so much for your reply, Indigo. I imagine my true question would be, was it his illness that drove my father's cruelty, or was he just not a very decent human being.
    And of course you can't answer that, I know. I guess I just wish I could blame the illness, and not the man. Yes, I am mad at him, but I am also sad that I blamed HIM, instead of his bipolar. I hated him for too many years. I see it now as a sad waste of time.

     
    Old 05-11-2015, 06:56 PM   #4
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    Re: adult child of bipolar 2 Dad with a question

    Maybe this makes sense to you....your dad probably acted however he did because of his illness, and did not choose to have whatever demons he had. However, this does not give him a pass for harming his children, he is still responsible for his actions. His job was to nurture and protect you, and he was obligated to get medical help and follow treatment, including medication or do whatever it took to be a decent father. And your mother's job was also to nurture and protect her children, above all other considerations. If they failed.......Well, you sound like a smart person with a lot of insight, and close to finding the answers, or at least some peace.

    Last edited by Fl0werP0wer; 05-11-2015 at 07:11 PM.

     
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    Old 05-12-2015, 03:10 PM   #5
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    Re: adult child of bipolar 2 Dad with a question

    Thank you very, very much. I like what you've had to say, it was helpful to me!!

     
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