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  • 18yr old daughter is desparately depressed and I suspect cutting

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    Old 07-15-2017, 10:43 AM   #1
    Kitch1970
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    18yr old daughter is desparately depressed and I suspect cutting

    My daughter has never shared much of what goes on in her life to me. I have tried to get her to open up but she is just seems so embarrassed and awkward to talk to me. Unfortunately she has very low self esteem, which may be why she has such difficulty talking about her feelings. She is always angry and down. I recently found letters expressing desperate thoughts to her friends and to her father and I. We have spoken with her and expressed our concern and love for her but she says she was just venting.

    People vent the truth. She has agreed to talk to a professional but I suspect she doesn't really want to. She mentioned cutting herself in one of her letters, I am very scared for her and want desperately to help her. She says I am smothering her, when I ask where she is going and when she will be back. She doesn't even want me to come to her therapist appointment.

    How do I help her and make her see that her life is worth living? I don't want to be overbearing but I will not ignore this situation. It breaks my heart to see her so sad and depressed (which comes out as anger and resentment). Depression runs in the family on both sides; I myself see someone every 3 weeks and have been on antidepressants for 15 years. I do understand feeling all alone and worthless and I want her to know she can tell me anything.

    Any advice would be so appreciated. I am just so lost and heartbroken.

    Last edited by Administrator; 07-15-2017 at 12:47 PM.

     
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    Old 07-15-2017, 02:12 PM   #2
    MSNik
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    Re: 18yr old daughter is desparately depressed and I suspect cutting

    Hi there. I feel bad for you. Obviously you want what is best for your daughter and you know the signs and symptoms of something not being right..

    I would talk to your therapist about how to deal with this. I would also talk to your daughter. I assume she still lives under your roof? Does she go to school? work? Are you supporting her? These are all good reasons why as long as she is under your roof, she needs to be listening to you.

    You and your husband may want to do some sort of intervention where you give her choices...one is admitting herself into a program, two is seeing a therapist, three is ....get the picture? You dont want to scare her, but you do need to take control of this situation before you come home and find that she has hurt herself, or worse.

    Remember YOU are the parent...and kids these days are not as grown up as they like to think. If anything, they are less grown up than we were 20 years ago. Good luck to you!
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    Old 07-27-2017, 11:56 PM   #3
    sonja342
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    Re: 18yr old daughter is desparately depressed and I suspect cutting

    Hello,

    I can relate to your daughter, as I was the same way growing up. I never shared much with my mother especially any of my mental stuff going on. I kept it all to myself but I'm now glad she intervened because I was going off the deep end. I was very depressed and even started to hallucinate because it had gotten so bad. I had to be admitted to a mental hospital for 2 weeks, and they finally gave me my diagnosis, Bipolar. She needs to be seen by a doctor ASAP to find out what's bothering her and what is wrong. It can be outpatient or inpatient .. it just depends on her needs and what the doctor thinks. So be persistent, she may not like it now but she will be grateful later on. I'm very glad that my mom never gave up and would bug me all the time.

     
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