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Nobody around me understands-My brother and sister are paranoid schizophrenic

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Old 07-05-2006, 06:26 AM   #1
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Cornwall, England
Posts: 6
Janny123 HB User
Nobody around me understands-My brother and sister are paranoid schizophrenic

I'm very new to this kinda thing so please excuse me if I make lots of spelling mistakes. I'm not really writing this for any replies or any thing and I'm sorry that it's sooooooo long but I've just had a really stressful few days (well, years but the last few days have been more stressful than usual!) of coping with both my brothers and sisters illness 24 hours a day and need to vent!
I don't really know where to start either but here goes..
I'm 30 years old and my family is very small, consisting of my mum, my sister aged 46 and my brother aged 39. When I was a lot younger we used to be a fairly close family although I never really 'gelled' with my brother very well. My brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was just 8 years old. He used to live with my mother and I at the time. My mother kept telling me of his increasingly alarming behaviour but I could see it for myself. He used to tell us that he was being followed by someone in a red car every time he went out. At first I guess my mum believed him but just couldn't work out why that would happen. Then he told us that it was the KGB or FBI was tracking him and said that our home was bugged etc etc. My mum eventually got help for him at the time, he was diagnosed with Paranoid Schizophrenia & put under section until his meds started working. 18 years later and he's still a very poorly man. He doesn't believe he suffers from any illness and never has. He doesn't take his meds but still goes to the doctors to collect them every few weeks. He puts his daily dose of tablets down the toilet everyday so as not to be 'caught out'. I've explained to his doctor that he's not taking his meds. He's quite aware of this but apparently there's nothing they can do until he gets so poorly that he needs to be sectioned again. He used to have a visit from a health visitor every couple of weeks so they could see how he was doing but he generally doesn't answer the door to them and when he does he's perfectly calm and lucid, telling them how he goes for long walks everyday, his various hobbies etc but the truth is very different. He spends most of his time indoors, calling both my mum and myself to tell us who has been beheaded in the appartments upstairs and how his girlfriend has been gang raped by some guys that were sitting next to her during a t.v interview (he thinks he's got a television link in his front room that enables him to communicate with people on the t.v. He mostly watches SkySports as he thinks he's engaged to one of the presenters) He has bought train tickets to various locations across the country expecting to meet up with his presenter fiance but then calls us up, absolutely heartbroken because she's stood him up or she's been fatally wounded. It just seems such a shame that there's nothing else the docs can do but to wait for him to be so very poorly that he becomes a danger either to himself or to the community. He's well known to the police in his local area. They've been called out to visit him on several occasions. Once a very worried mum called the police out to him for video recording what she thought was her children playing on the street. He said he was actually recording the movements of certain vehicles that his fiance had been kidnapped in/raped in/beheaded in etc. He used to send threatening letters to a particular police officer at the local station too, he said this police man was trying to frame him for something or other.
My sister on the other hand believes she is walking with the lord. She knows she is poorly but we agree to differ on which area's in her life are the illness and which are purely demons/satan/temptation trying to attack her. She believes she became ill after a witch spiked her drink. She's just suffering another breakdown at the moment which has prompted me to write all this. She's throwing towels over the t.v because it can see her, will listen to a certain christian radio station only at the moment but even that's getting a bit too scary for her as most of the words spoken are criptic messages for her. She's kicked out her boyfriend of 4 years as she said she doesn't recognise him anymore, she's been crying for most of the day asking for her old Frank to come back. She didn't recognise me either a couple of days ago & said my heart had turned cold and hard towards her. She reads car number plates as they're also messages for her. She just told me the other day that she used to be a shop lifter about 8 years ago due to my mother not paying her £600 that she owed her from a house sale when I was just 6. She said that the lord has told her that she has to become 100% clean so has been posting her disability living allowance through the letterboxes of various shops that she's stolen from in the past for attonment, even though the shops that she stole from originally have closed down many years ago and have been taken over by new companies. She also believes that my fiance and every one of my friends that she's met are on mind reading tablets. She won't go near my fiance and I have to tell her that he's out when she calls otherwise she'll put the phone down. She's often confronted my friends, accusing them of reading her mind and has told them she'll give them something to see if they're not careful. They don't have a clue how to act when they're around her, and because she 'reads their body language' too, they just look so uncomfortable. They know she can't help it, and they're all informed of her illness before they meet her so they're a bit more prepared for any outbursts.
My mum cannot handle their illnesses at all. She simply can't cope. Every time they even speak to her about what their thinking she tries to change the subject or tells them to stop talking so silly. As you can probably imagine there's not much talking goes on between them. They try to tell her their thoughts but she just doesn't get that it's just the illness talking. Now that my sister is experiancing another breakdown my mum simply calls me, tells me she can't cope, so I then have to drive to her and seek medical help. I don't live anywhere near my brother or my sister which can make life difficult. My brother lives about 350 miles away and my sis about 400 miles away in the other direction! My sister's boyfriend doesn't understand either and just kept saying that if she didn't pull herself together she'd be put in a hospital and she wouldn't want that would she-I NEARLY BLEW MY TOP AT THAT!! Had to take him outside and told him not to use hospitalisation as a threat towards her-sometimes it's the best thing to do in certain situations. He's been threatening to leave her over the past few days too as he can't take my sisters rejection of him. They're not sleeping together anymore as my sister says she's not clean yet. Both my brother and my sister have been sectioned on several occasions before. I just wish there was something I could do to take their illness away. I'd give everything I had just to have a proper conversation with my brother and sister but I doubt now that it'll ever happen. I've never been able to just talk with my my big sis or big bro like other people do. When I do try to talk with them they can't register what I'm saying at all. I have to be so careful what I say either to them or even to other people in their company because their minds are so busy looking for signs or messages. I have to re-explain everything i say to my sister just in case she takes it the wrong way. When we're out together she listens to other people's conversations and gets messages from the snippets that she hears so I find myself trying to listen to the same conversations so I can try to explain to her what they were talking about before she imagines it to mean something else!! It can be exhausting! I've been told by a doctor that it's quite unusual for both a brother and a sister to have paraniod schizophrenia like in our case-I don't know if that's true or not. I love them both sincerely, I know that. All I can do is hope that one day there'll be a medication that will all but remove the symptoms, and that by brother will one day realise he's ill and take his medication regularly for his own good. If you've managed to read through all this, thankyou. I hope it makes some sense. If there's anyone with similar stories I'd love to hear them. It'd be nice to know that I'm not the only one.

Kindest regards and thanks for your patience,


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Old 07-05-2006, 12:46 PM   #2
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3
Re: Nobody around me understands-My brother and sister are paranoid schizophrenic

I feel really sorry for you and you're family. In my family I am the one who sees and hears things and gets paranoid, but i am no where near as deep into the disease as your brother and sister. Most of the time I am fine I just have huge breakdowns at times, but then again I am still a teenager and I have only had it for 4 years. I don't know how you can handle 2 people in the same family with the disease. Anyways I really hope your brother comes around and starts using his medication and I also hope the medication starts working miracles for both of them. I don't know what religion you are (or aren't) so I don't know if this means much to you, but I am praying for you and your brother and your sister and your mom. Stay strong and hope for the best.

Old 07-12-2006, 08:25 PM   #3
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 5
kassy34 HB User
Re: Nobody around me understands-My brother and sister are paranoid schizophrenic

Hi I just read You story and my heart breaks for I to have an older sister that has never really come back to reality in the past 24 years.She dose not think that she is Schizofrenic and to top that off My own Mother has been in denile for all of these years as well. I spent 12 years of my life taking care of my sis untill a friend told me that I needed a life to. That I would never get married and have a family of my own if I din't look out for me as well.

So many hospitals so many times

You are not alone

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