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dreams in neon 03-13-2009 06:01 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
People with schizophrenia can be extremely distant. I know this happens to me whenever I hear voices. (I don't have schizophrenia, but I do have a schizophrenic form of bipolar.) As difficult as this is to hear, I don't think there's anything you can do until he decides to get help and takes his meds on a regular basis. If I were you, I'd give him some time to get better before I would continue communicating with him. He's probably confused because of the voices he hears and doesn't know what to do, so he avoids people. He may also be in such a state where he's unable to tell the difference between reality and fantasy. When I was severely psychotic in 2006 and again in December, I wouldn't respond to anything people said to me because my voices were too strong and powerful.

Apple83 03-13-2009 10:17 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
Hey,

Thank you for your reply, your advice is really helpful. I'm just so worried about him, mainly that he'll harm himself. I just keep thinking of him on his own in his flat, slowly deteriorating. I've even thought about imposing my presence on him and going to stay with him - I can deal with being screamed at if I know he's safe. Like I said, I don't feel ready to move on - it would be such a horrible waste, and I know that if he was feeling well again it would be the last thing he'd want. I'll wait as long as it takes - I don't think it's a lost cause, everybody is capable of happiness. It's just upsetting when, even if people think they have your best interests at heart, they suggest you move on. They clearly fail to understand the bond I have with my bf.

Any further advice on coping mechanisms, how best to approach the issue etc would be much appreciated! I have bought 2 books on the subject, but am grateful for any first-hand advice from sufferers of schizophrenia and people who have been through a similar ordeal to the one I'm going through now.

Thanks again xxx

dreams in neon 03-13-2009 10:23 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
You're welcome. I understand what you're going through because my 2 sisters shared alot of the same feelings after I was diagnosed with bipolar three years ago.

If you do a search on the board, you should be able to find a list of books about schizophrenia. There was a thread not too long ago about this in which several people responded.

I wonder if it would be possible for you to attend his psychiatrist appointments along with him? This would allow you to learn more about schizophrenia and how his specific symptoms affect him.

If you don't mind my asking, what kind of schizophrenia does he have? (i.e. paranoid schizophrenia, undifferentiated schizophrenia, residual schizophrenia, etc.) If I know this, I can provide more suggestions as to how you can help.

Apple83 03-13-2009 10:47 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
Hey,

I think it's paranoid schizophrenia, though I'm not entirely sure. From what I can gather, he's also very depressed at this time. It all erupted in a big mess a few weeks ago, and I haven't seen/spoken to him since. I feel like I've let him down - he put so much faith in me, and asked me not to leave him. I've sent him a couple of emails saying that I'm here if he needs anything, and that I'll be waiting for him. I just hope that's enough for him to realise that I'm not going to desert him, and that I'd give anything to be with him right now.

Please help!

xxx

Apple83 03-13-2009 11:04 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
He appears to be manifesting more of the negative symptoms at the moment, but is suffering from extreme paranoia.

dreams in neon 03-13-2009 11:22 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
What meds is he currently taking? Is he taking an antipsychotic? Antipsychotics will help relieve his paranoia and auditory hallucinations.

I'm getting ready to leave for an appointment right now, but I'll check back later for your response.

Apple83 03-13-2009 11:34 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
Hey,

Thanks again, I really appreciate your support. He is (supposed to be) taking Abilify, but hasn't been doing so. That is why this has all happened. Apparently he stopped taking them because he was so happy when we got together and he thought he could manage without them. Now it appears that he has still not started taking them again, since he is getting progressively worse. I'm concerned that he will end up in hospital if this continues. If he were to start taking the medication again soon, roughly how long could it potentially take before he is feeling well again?

I so desperately want to contact him, but don't think he would be in the right frame of mind to talk to me. I want to be there for him, to make sure he's eating and taking care of himself, and to prevent him from feeling so isolated. But I just don't know what the right thing to do is anymore.

Hope all goes well with your appointment.

xxx

Apple83 03-15-2009 09:29 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
Anyone?!

xxx

dreams in neon 03-15-2009 10:18 AM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
I don't know what else to suggest because if he stops taking his meds, there really isn't alot you can do. It's too bad he couldn't try a different antipsychotic especially if he is bothered by side effects from Abilify.

blondie01928 11-11-2009 03:00 PM

Re: Struggling to cope with boyfriend's schizophrenia, please help
 
hello there i understand what ur dealing with because my boyfriend has some of the issues that you was sayin but mine does'nt yell at me and for me to leave but he does withdraw himself from me and hes quiet and does'nt talk to me and he gets sucidial thoughts and the past 7 weeks has been really rough on us because he has been without his risperdal shot because medicade so we have to get some things straightened out with them.i love him dearly and i dont want to lose him and what we have.alot of times i just try n to touch him n tell him that i love him and even tho he dont want me to touch him i still do just so that he knows that i care but alot of times he takes a nap n he keeps himself in our bedroom n he just stays on the computer.i dont know if that will help you out or not but maybe he needs a diff med risperdal works really well for my boyfriend


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