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Worriedforex 03-14-2009 09:47 AM

Concerned about ex. Please help!
Hello everyone,

As you can tell by my user name and the title of this thread, I am quite concerned about the behaviors of my ex-fiance. About four months ago she left me, suddenly deciding that she didn't want to pursue our relationship anymore. My parents talked to their counsellor about her behaviors throughout our relationship and he had said that she was quite possibly sociopathic. Looking up the definition of this, some behaviors fit, but she doesn't quite fit the pattern. Listed below are her symptoms/behaviors and I was hoping someone could please help bring peace back to my heart.

1) Very controlling nature, to the point of being "My way or the highway" most of the time. Otherwise she would be quite angry and "pouty" for extended periods of time.
2) Lying about her history, things she said and did.
3) Extreme changes in plans, appearance, financial views, etc.
4) Constant moving around. She's lived in 3 towns/cities in 4 months.
5) Lack of care for personal possessions such as vehicle and other property.
6) Lack of respect and care for people. When she left, she stated that if I needed anything to not hesitate to call. When I would call she would tell me to leave her alone, then a few days or even hours later, she would call me asking for something.
7) Jumping into a relationship within a month after ours ended. We were together for two and a half years and very emotionally close.

Thank you all for your time and consideration. If there any questions, please feel free to ask. I hope with this information that maybe there can be help for her. Although we're not together she still means a lot to me, and if what the counsellor said was true, it could mean a very long and lonely life for her. Thanks again!

Seraph 03-14-2009 05:13 PM

Re: Concerned about ex. Please help!
It is nice of you to be so concerned, but believe me, she will have number one as her main priority. My son has just been dumped by one of these, and it sounds like she is a sister under the skin to your ex. Don't worry about her, you are truly better off without her. I have posted on this board about my exDIL, have a look and see what you have escaped from. Sera.

Soibhan 03-14-2009 09:08 PM

Re: Concerned about ex. Please help!
I know it sounds harsh, but this woman is mentally ill and until SHE decides to seek help, her life will be going in a downward spiral. You sound like a kind, sensitive person and you deserve a woman who is willing to meet you halfway in the issues of life. You certainly didn't cause your ex's problems, nor can you help her if she doesn't see that she has some major issues. Does she have parents or siblings with whom she is close? As her ex-fiance I would think you have the right to speak with her family (when she's not around) and express your concerns. They may not realize how ill she is. Then, for your own sake, walk away and don't look back. You've done all you can do. I'm sorry it's turned out so rotten for you, but life will get better--I'm sure of it!

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