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I'm so completly lost...

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Old 12-14-2006, 09:10 AM   #1
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: CA
Posts: 2
cookiecrumbled HB User
Unhappy I'm so completly lost...

In my short lived life, I've been through a lot. Im only 16 and my mom just passed away. My mom and I hadnt had the best relationship because she was an addict to meth and alcohol. All my life all i ever wanted was for my mom to be sober and happy. But she never was able to be happy and now I feel like I'm doing the same. I have been kicked out of my aunts house whom that is all I have left in my family and she kicked me to the curb. I live with my boyfriend, we have been going out for a while but even that doesnt make me happy n e more. I have no friends either cuz i go to home school I dont interact with many people. I dont know what to do everyday just seems to get worse and worse. Every morning i wake up early and just cry, I can't help it my life sucks horribly. On top of it all I just had an abortion...I didnt tell many people but some how it got out and now everyone is talking smack about me. I'ts not like I wanted or choose to be preagnant, I just dont want my kids to go trough what I went through. Now especially around christmas time I miss my mom more than anything. My only wish is that she were to come back to me but thats not possible....

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Old 12-15-2006, 04:36 AM   #2
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 3,260
Re: I'm so completly lost...

hi cookie------you are just so young to have to go through all of this. especially alone. rest assured that your mom is at peace and clean and sober. I know that doesn't help since she is not right next to you but believe me she is watching you. do youhave any other family? do you have a friends family who can take you in? just my opinion but you are too young to be living with your boyfriend especially if you are unhappy. the abortion is over, hard as itis try to get through it. i commmend youfor making a decision not to bring a child into the world without stable parents even though abortion is a hard thing for me to except it was the right decision for you. are you in school? any close friends? please write back and let me know what's going on and a little more about you. Maybe i can help more if i know more about you. where's your Dad? sorryfor all the questions but it's hard to help unless you know the whole picture.


Old 12-17-2006, 04:03 AM   #3
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Re: I'm so completly lost...

Dear cookiecrumbled,

I know (from personal experience) that the death of a loved one can be more difficult to manage during the holiday season. My mother(2002) was a functioning alcaholic until her carpal tunnel pains stripped the "functioning" aspect of it away. I will not go into detail at this point because I realize that you are at a fragile state. If you want me to elaborate, I will.

One thing I was grateful for is that she no longer had to suffer with the many ailments that were plaguing her life. She was in a safer place and I actually thanked God for that(though I still miss her so).

I also can relate to the "boyfriend-girlfriend" moving in together scenario. For some reason, I feel that you have so much more to share. Feel free to post anytime.

We don't judge people here and if you stay around long enough, you are bound to learn a thing or two(as I have).

Take care
God Bless

Old 12-17-2006, 05:56 PM   #4
susan kay
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Haughton La.
Posts: 300
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Re: I'm so completly lost...

cookie i am so sorry you are having to deal with adult problems at such an early age. can you go to a school that is for kids who have a regular school. we have them here and you do your work at your own pace and then you get to graduate and have a diploma. is here such a place to help you get a job so you can have some money in your own pocket. at 16 living with some one is just to young. i know you had no other choice . but you are having to face adult problems just to early. i just lost my mom to but i am much older than you. no offence please but you are just a baby. and as hard as it was you made a very adult responsiable decision in deciding not to have the baby . yes you had other options but im sure you thought about it before you made your finial decision. sweetie i am so sorry your so young and life is not supossed to be this hard.lets us know how you are. susan kay

Old 12-18-2006, 02:11 AM   #5
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Ke
Posts: 327
CoyoteBound HB User
Re: I'm so completly lost...

cookiecrummbled....So sory for your loss of your Mom. I too just lost my Mom in March 2006 and we all know what your going through. You are so young, but remember that all you need to do is Pray and ask God to give you the strenth you need to go on. Maybe you can ask around and find a friend that will take you in. Your yong and you don't really need to be tied down at siuch an early age. I know having the abortion must of been hard, but at least you looked at it the right way.

God Bless You,

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