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Losing a loved one

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Old 01-30-2008, 08:33 AM   #1
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Location: tacoma, wa
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stepheebeez HB User
Losing a loved one

Hi all. I have been reading alot on Grief and Loss of parents, spouses, children, and other family memebers. I lost my Mom in July of this year to colon cancer that she had battled for 2 1/2 years. I was angry and very upset and the most person I was upset with was God. I had so many questions that I feel that he needed to answer right away and of course I got nothng.
My Mom and I had talked before she had passed and she knew how angry I was with her dying. She suggested this to me and I wanted to share what she suggested to me in a new thread on this board instead of writing this indivdually to everyones threads even though my heart goes out to each and every one of you.
My Mom's dad died from cancer. My Mom was mad just like I was (still am) and she told me that she had written a letter. It wasn't to anyone special, just a letter stating how ****** off she was about everything. She told me that when she was ready and wasn't angry anymore, she ripped it up and through it away. She told me that I should do the same. So four months after she passed away, I picked up a notebook and wrote down EVERYTHING I was feeling. How mad I was, how God could do this to someone whom he supposidly loves, blah blah blah. It actually made me feel better. Now I know this may sound dumb, but I never threw that letter away. Instead I made it more of a journal from me to my Mom. I don't write in it everyday but I do write in it about 3 times a week and it is more of a theraputic thing for me. I am writing letters to my Mom and even though I don't send them and don't get a response back it does make me feel better in a way even though I don't get anything back from her.
This may have sounded simple and stupid to some people, but it is helping me get through the loss of my Mom whom I miss dearly and love so much.
Bless you all,

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Old 01-31-2008, 07:44 PM   #2
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Canada
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jsph110 HB User
Re: Losing a loved one

You are not alone Stephe. We are all going to pass on to the other side and you will soon be with your mother. I have complained to God many times in the past because of things that i thought were not fair, only to later find out that they happened for the good. all the pieces of the puzzle will fall into place one day and like your mother, you will nolonger be angry any more. time heals all wounds.

I remember once when Jesus attended his friend's Lazarus funeral and he wept. infact, 'Jesus wept' is the shortest verse in the whole bible ; and He was weeping because His friend had died and all their family were mourning.

My point is God understands that it is painful. but the bible says there is a time for everything, a time to be born and a time to die. One day it will make sense. ask him to help you bear the pain because He commands us in His word to cast our cares upon Him because He cares for us.

I trust you will be well. I am praying for you.

Old 01-31-2008, 08:03 PM   #3
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stepheebeez HB User
Re: Losing a loved one

Thank you Josph for that.

Old 01-31-2008, 09:15 PM   #4
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music47 HB User
Re: Losing a loved one


I am sorry about the loss of your Mom. I appreciate you sharing with us about putting your thoughts in a letter. I've loss my Mom too so I know the pain that you feel. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


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