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  • How did my boyfriend give me herpes after 3 years?

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    Old 01-18-2018, 05:03 PM   #1
    scaredherpes's Avatar
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    Unhappy How did my boyfriend give me herpes after 3 years?

    I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years. We have only had PROTECTED sex in our entire 3 year relationship. However, we've been doing oral UNPROTECTED for 3 years. Before dating each other, we both had ONE previous partner (now being 4 years ago.) Other than that we have never had sex/oral with anyone else. However, 12 days ago my boyfriend & I had oral sex. 3 days after that, I started feeling tingly and 2 days after I had blisters/ulcers and when those disappeared, new ones formed. I told him and he said he has had cold sores since he was younger (Ive never had a cold sore) but didn't know that could even lead to genital herpes. I'm just confused about how it took 3 ENTIRE YEARS for me to get it transmitted. Was it dormant? Did he cheat on me? Was it from mine or his previous relationship? Why did I barely get it not, if we have been having unprotected oral sex for 3 entire years on the regular. I have never had any sort of blisters or ANYTHING on my vagina EVER. I have a doctors appt. scheduled but in the mean time I want to know your thoughts.
    Thank you.

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    Old 01-19-2018, 12:49 AM   #2
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    Re: How did my boyfriend give me herpes after 3 years?

    Dear scared,

    No need at all for being scared; just get educated.
    No one can ever know for a fact where Herpes originated.

    Herpes sure can be very painful whether in the mouth or on the genital area but it is a virus so it usually heals up in a week to ten days (if you treat it right) and can be managed as well as avoided. The baby rash ointment called A & D (a vitamin ointment) really hastens the healing while it soothes the pain. The numbers I or II ONLY denote the outbreak location, oral or genital. It is the same virus and you could have had it for years without an outbreak until your immune system was down from illness or stress.

    The outbreak does mean you got it from somewhere but it does not prove when or from where you got exposed. It can be spread by oral sex. It be dormant for many years, and it does NOT mean one of you cheated. The virus can become active from stress and/or a low immune system that causes an outbreak in a moist area such as the mouth or crotch. Once my mate and I learned to keep our immune systems up, neither of us have had any herpes outbreak in many years.

    Just don't kiss or engage in sexual contact until the sore(s) are completely healed and dried up. Herpes is just as contagious from the lips or mouth as from the genital area. A baby can get it from auntie's moist kiss on the mouth. It can lie dormant until the child is an adult and goes through a stressful period of time or weak immune system, then get an outbreak. Many get oral herpes as children then later can pass it through oral sex, when it is called Herpes II. It is very common. Now that you know you both have the virus, just don't pass it back and forth. Let the other know if you have an outbreak and take precautions.

    Please read up on it on reputable websites, like the Mayo Clinic website.
    Eat and drink foods that build up your immune system, and learn how to deal with stress in a healthy way, just as you would if one of you had a flu or cold virus.
    ~ YaYa ~

    Last edited by yayagirl; 01-19-2018 at 12:22 PM.

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    herpes, hsv-1, hsv-2, sex, std

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