It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....

Herpes Message Board

How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old 03-25-2005, 02:01 PM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 8
Berkshiregirl HB User
How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

Ok, Heres my story - I started dating a guy I had known for about 3 years - nice guy, good guy etc. WELL we became sexually active and after about 2 months I started to have this burning, itchin and then eventually sores, so I called the doctor and went straight there. She had said it looked like herpes and that she would give me valtrex and to take lysine and that she would send the test out just to make sure and would let me know, we also did a blood test. Well the test came back as herpes i think 1 (the kind found in the mouth usually) but the blood test came back negative. I told my partner and he felt awful and at the time I was so mad, I had always been so careful and he messed it all up. HOWEVER he got tested and it was negative and then got tested 2 more times and still negative? How is this possible, I asked the doctor and she said that she had seen this once before but had no explaination. She said if he was the only one I had been with for a long time then it would definatly be from him since the blood work came back negative which would mean that I just got it. Does anyone know anything about this!?! Help!!

Sponsors Lightbulb
Old 03-25-2005, 05:45 PM   #2
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 6
Julia_dances HB User
Re: How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

I don't know a lot about herpes. I'm on my second outbreak and trying to understand it all. I hope you aren't in too much pain, and that your partner has been supportive to you.

I have a similar question, though, and you phrased it perfectly: "How do I have herpes, and he doesn't?"

How did my boyfriend get just three little tiny bumps once, that itched but never spread or got worse, and quickly went away? That was at the time of my first outbreak, which appeared a couple of days later and almost was the end of me! We sleep together regularly and yet somehow, I've just had my second outbreak and he didn't have anything and doesn't now while I do? How do I have so much pain and suffering, and he seems pretty much unaffected by it all?

Old 03-25-2005, 05:49 PM   #3
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 8
Berkshiregirl HB User
Re: How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

Well - Everyone has a different reaction to Herpes some people don't even know they have it and have no reaction at all and others react very strongly. Just like you I had severe pain, I thought for sure it was the end of me as well. I told another girl this to, I took a bath with epson salt in it, I also got from my doctor a liquid that numbs the area which would make a lot easier to go to the bathroom and to put underwear and jeans on etc. I take valtrex for my outbreaks and I only take 1 pill twice a day for 3 days and that seems to help.

Old 03-25-2005, 05:54 PM   #4
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 302
hsvmom HB User
Re: How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

that is odd...honestly I would wonder if there was a false negative in there somewhere, which is not all that uncommon. What type of test did he have done? Have you ever known him to have cold sores? With it being HSV-1 odds are you got it through oral sex. I'll be interested to see what some of the local "experts" say about this...

my dh has oral HSV, but not genital like I do. Our's is an odd situation though, so I don't think it is the same...
Mom to two HSV-1 survivors!

Old 03-25-2005, 05:59 PM   #5
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 8
Berkshiregirl HB User
Re: How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

I've never in all my years of knowing him seen a cole sore or anything like that. They did a blood test - that came negative and then they also took a sample (painful) and tested that - positive. I have no idea, I am going to go back and get another blood test done, but even so, there was no WAY I got it in the past and I got all the symptoms etc. test book style and he has NOTHING??

Old 03-26-2005, 03:59 AM   #6
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 29
preocupado HB User
Re: How do I have herpes and he doesn't?

Iīm not in your situation, but Iīd like to share a simliar one my friend had. Sheīs been 10 years with the same guy, married now. The most faithful couple you can imagine, certainly to cheating. She came down with genital herpes 6 years ago. Got tested and apparently it was hsv-1, the oral type she now has genitally. Her husband got tested too and all tests came back negative. So they donīt have a clue either how she got it!

Taking a blood test is tricky, thatīs what Iīve learned from all my research. First of all you have to wait for months usually before anything shows up, before the antibodies build in your body. I had a blood test run during my first ob and it came back negative. So my exposure should have been very recent. Iīm planning to take another test in a month or two to find out my type.

I was sure herpes was included in general std tests but my gyn says itīs not. I live abroad at the moment and told my local gyn that for sure they test it in my home country. She said that they wouldnīt. Makes sense for me now since herpes would be so hard to detect. Could be you have it but it doesnīt show on the test. Or could be youīre positive for hsv-1 but you have it facially, a normal cold sore. So the only way of telling for sure if you have it genitally is getting tested all the time and wait for a possible ob.

Very complicated, believe me, Iīm still very confused, about a month after my first ob started.

AS for him not having a lot of symptoms, us women always get the worst part. Generally stdīs are a lot worse for women, our "equipment" is so much more delicate. This is why so many guys do spread stdīs, because they just donīt know they have one. Iīm sure most donīt do this on purpose, they just donīt know.

Hope this helps a bit !

Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
herpes jlean1 Herpes 1 04-19-2010 09:28 AM
Herpes testing specifics rajtp Herpes 4 04-28-2008 07:24 AM
herpes type 1 dario1225 Herpes 1 01-22-2008 02:27 PM
Test positive for herpes and then negative for type 1 and 2? Yquestion Herpes 22 10-31-2007 06:45 AM
worried about herpes from body rub alex26 Herpes 24 10-14-2007 11:23 AM
Few Questions on Herpes !! sasjod Herpes 3 09-19-2006 06:50 AM
Herpes statistics islandgirl Herpes 8 08-16-2005 07:18 PM
Would you risk herpes for love? sunshineahead Herpes 32 03-28-2005 11:57 AM
normal people have no clue about herpes hello223 Herpes 18 03-23-2004 08:02 PM
sex life after herpes diagnosis myblusky Herpes 25 03-07-2004 12:43 PM

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Sign Up Today!

Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

I want my free account

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:00 PM.

Site owned and operated by™
Đ 1998-2018™ All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!