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  • having sex with someone without knowing they have herpes & they never told me

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    Old 02-23-2009, 04:21 PM   #1
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    having sex with someone without knowing they have herpes & they never told me

    Is it possible for a guy to have type 2 herpes & for me to have sex with him for 3 1/2 months & take a std
    test & come out negative for type 2. I tested positive for type 1 on june of 2008,

    Ok now lets continue. I kept having sex with him tell november of 2008.I std tested again on jan 16th of 2009. At this time when i got my tests back i was type 2 positive. My number was 4.10 with the type 2. And my type 1 was 5.00.

    Now with all of this being stated is it possible that when me & him started to have sex in march of 2008 he had herpes but then when i tested in june of 2008 that he hadnt infected me yet?Mabye that when i tested again jan of 2009 that the antibodies finally did build up enough that it showed up on the blood test. Its possible that he infected me some where inbetween june of 2008-nov of 2008! Cause in middle november thats the last time me & him had sex.

    Now with all of this being stated i have to clarify something i had no idea tell jan 16th i had herpes. I have no idea if this is the dude that gave me the herpes or not. I am asuming so sense we have been having sex for a long time. Yes i know i was stupid i never wore condoms. So ya please call me stupid for doing that cause i even call myself stupid for doing that. I have no proof that he is the one that spread it to me cause he is denying it.

    I have to add 1 more guys into the mix. I had sex with doug on jan 1st of 2009! If doug would of spread the herpes to me i would of had to have Seroconversion in 2 weeks time. Honestly im not sure if thats possible. I have heard that it takes from a month to 6 months to test positive for type 2 herpes on the blood test. So ya 2 weeks is a lil to shy for that. And plus i had type 1 herpes in june of 2008. I have no idea on how long ive had type 1. I heard it can take a lil bit longer to Seroconversion when the person had type 1 before they had type 2. I cant recall why but i have heard this.

    Now with this being stated I do recall having a bump down below on jan 4th for about a week. I got the bump on my period. After my period was done i put lip balm on it & it cleared right up.But keep in mind i hadnt yet did my 2nd std test so at this time i had no idea of what this was. I passed it along as a infected hair or whatever.So now its middle feburary. I got another bump the same as like on jan 4th. Actually this time i went to the dentist & i think that stress or whatever on my body & thats why i had this outbreak. So with this outbreak on jan 4th for a full week is it possible that it could of been doug that spread it to me? After sex only 3 days?Thats what im very confused about. I have heard that u can get an outbreak from 2 to 20 days after being infected.

    Other then this honestly i think it was the first guy i was having sex with for a year. I dont think it was doug. I am having doug tested but he is under his parents insurance & he is scared they will find out. And well the other dude i had sex with for a year wont get tested & is denying it. So here is where i need your help. I need u to give me your opinion on the situation! Who do u think infected me?Guy number 1 or doug?I will just call him guy number 1 or the dude i slept with for a full year. I am really confused & just want to figure out whom i got this from so i dont have to keep accusing the other one of spreading it to me. Cause right now im blaming both of them!!!Thanks every one!!!!!

    Last edited by tracypatzold; 02-23-2009 at 04:22 PM.

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    Old 02-26-2009, 12:37 AM   #2
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    Re: having sex with someone without knowing they have herpes & they never told me

    Doug has had NO symptoms?? it would seem odd he could give it to you unless he had a bump, but then lots of guys aren't all that "aware" but a lesion is usually painful and itchy and such.... with the facts you presented I would say probably Doug, because it usually does show up 2-7 days later. Of course it is common knowledge that you can get it and not have an outbreak for a long time but not as common as an immediate one. I will share with you about how I got my infection.... My husband and I had been married for 5 years and I knew he had it but we were always very careful- always... and still don't really know how I got it. We never did anything while his sores were active, although we occasionally used a condom during this because his spot was very small and seemingly easy to completely cover with a condom but I got it anyway and I'm sure that when it happened was one time while on vacation (stress,etc) he had an outbreak we used condoms and then after it was supposedly gone we had sex again and I could feel it come on very clearly within 3 days as I look back and I got mine in such a strange place... in the upper crevice of my buttock crease... yea weird ....I really didn't know what it was at first thought a heat rash, but got so damn painful and when I finally went to the Dr after nearly 2 weeks of it getting worse and spreading they swabbed it and no question was type 2 herpes, my husband still has a hard time believing it because it's an odd place, but the tests are proof. I never had the blood test because they had lesions to test which is the best way. I've heard blood tests are not as accurate as you'd like.... and on a side note: my EX called me many years back all freaked out because his STD testing showed positive for type 2 and he had never had any kind of outbreak... I said gee I dunno, but it kinda spooked me ya know. I said don't worry about it if you don't break out I guess....he wanted to know if I had any, and hadn't at that time....hey sorry to sound glum, but I wanted to give you some insight cuz it's a tough deal --I have outbreaks every 3 months or so and the med Zovirax really helps. The original outbreak crawled up my sacral area and now the whole area is always very tender and cannot get abraised or it will break out. Triggers are caffeine, chocolate, nuts, heat, stress and being rough on area. No more thong underwear for me... I feel sorry for Doug. (and for you too) He sounds scared. I remember when my husband (we had only been going out for a couple of dates but had not yet had sex when he told me) got up the nerve to tell me about it so I could decide if it was a huge issue for me ahead of time.... he was so nervous and I felt sorry for him. I hope any of this helps you. I feel for you... Really it could be either and you probably will never know, whoever had a sore is the one....

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