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I'm new, I'm very upset about herpes

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Old 03-12-2013, 05:36 PM   #1
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Leeds Uk
Posts: 4
Sunflower49 HB User
Unhappy I'm new, I'm very upset about herpes

I've just today been diagnosed with herpe's type1, on my genitals.
I'm SO devastated. I've always been careful-I've slept with far less people than most people I know, some a LOT younger than me and I'm so upset to have caught this.

I'm in a long-term relationship, but I have a couple of female friends that I've recently been intimate with. My partner doesn't mind this at all, we're comfortable with it.
Before we slept together I discussed sexual history with them, both had recently been tested.
However, a few days after sleeping with the most recent one, I developed redness, soreness at the top of my 'slit' if you like. I went to the doctors and was tested for everything but she was almost reluctant to take a swab of this red area, as she said it was almost definitely just a spot, probably caused by shaving the area, and not to worry, she was taking a swab just to put my mind at rest.
And yes, it came back that it's herpes. Type1-caught from oral sex.
I told my partner and he's 100% supportive. He even thinks I could have caught it from him rather than my girl friend, as he's had coldsores in the past albeit no symptoms for 30 years. I learned that even without any symptoms the virus is contagious.
I now realise I've been really stupid, to think that if a girl has been tested and comes back clean, she doesn't have coldsores as the NHS only test for it if someone requests it and/or has symptoms. It's not in the usual STD testing routine.
I've been told that this outbreak was relatively mild and as it's likely my first outbreak, if I even have another one (which I may not!) it will be even milder. I'm trying to console myself in that, and the fact that my partner is the most understanding person in the world and loves me despite this.... Also the nurse who called me with the diagnosis, told me 60-70% of people carry this virus and I'm being silly to get so upset about it.

What can I do? I know I can take antiviral meds, but I am sceptical of those and have heard natural remedies can be as good if not better. I use natural products in most areas of life, I'm a fan of coconut and castor oil, I rarely use commercial shampoos or conditioners, I eat vegan and have for many years-but I've never had a specific health condition like this, that I've sought natural 'medication' for.
I am flitting between crying my eyes out, and feeling silly for doing so when this is so common, I feel 'damaged' somehow and am really upset
I feel bad for just coming on here and asking for help. I will offer more than this to this forum, It's about time I was more active in the health community online, anyway!

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Old 03-25-2013, 07:47 AM   #2
Junior Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 22
mintlady HB User
Re: I'm new, I'm very upset about herpes


Trust what the nurse said. HSV1 is extremely common - and think about how little most people worry about it when it's oral instead of genital! You definitely could have gotten it from anyone. It's great you have such an understanding partner - you are so lucky.

As for taking an antiviral, I've heard a few different things from health professionals. The one I trusted the most was an older nurse at Planned Parenthood. She wrote me a script for Valtrex for if I ever have another outbreak, and said that they don't usually recommend suppressive therapy for HSV1 genitally due to how inactive it tends to be down there. Lysine is a good supplement you can take instead.

I know you wrote this a while ago, but figured I'd try to respond anyway, just in case.

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