It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Human Papillomavirus (HPV) Message Board

  • HPV & Guilt

  • Post New Thread   Closed Thread
    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Old 06-07-2004, 05:48 PM   #31
    Gtpchic31
    Senior Member
     
    Gtpchic31's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2003
    Location: michigan,USA
    Posts: 221
    Gtpchic31 HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    im not sure what you could be feeling or why. It doesnt sound right though. Id go to the doc's to make sure its nothing. Its been a long time since your procedure so i dont think that would be it and i dont think you "feel" the hpv since its just a virus. Let me know what happens if you go to the doctors. Hope you feel better

     
    Sponsors Lightbulb
       
    Old 06-07-2004, 06:07 PM   #32
    beezkneez
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    beezkneez's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2004
    Location: Near Knoxville Tennessee
    Posts: 170
    beezkneez HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Thanks Chic, I have an appointment tomorrow so I will see what they say. It's only been the past couple of days or so but hopefully it's nothing. I'll let you know tomorrow what they say!
    __________________
    ~Knowledge is the best medicine.~

     
    Old 06-08-2004, 07:53 AM   #33
    Katttob
    Member
     
    Katttob's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Apr 2004
    Posts: 75
    Katttob HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Beez,
    You should make an appointment to see your doctor regarding those pains. I don't think they would be a result from the HPV.
    The sharp pains could be symptoms of a cyst on your ovary or PIV (pelvic inflamtory virus) or some other things. I have a friend who had these same symtpoms, and she was in a lot of pain but they went away in a couple days so she never went into her doctor.
    So get an appointment with your doctor and they will probably do a pelvic ultra-sound on you to see what's up.
    Good Luck!
    Oh, by the way...how are you dealing with your diagnosis with HPV, are you still upset? I think it was you that I had discussed seeing a therapist on campus?? But anyways, I have had 5 appointments with my therapist and I feel so much better than I did a month ago! So, I was just wondering how you are doing?? Hope things are well!

    Last edited by Katttob; 06-08-2004 at 07:55 AM.

     
    Old 06-08-2004, 09:11 PM   #34
    beezkneez
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    beezkneez's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2004
    Location: Near Knoxville Tennessee
    Posts: 170
    beezkneez HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Well guys, I went to the doctor today and explained to them my symptoms and the doctor said I could be developing endometriosis. I have another appointment to go back in a couple of weeks to have an ultrasound and exam to see what is really going on in there. (Speaking of the devil Katt Lol) As for talking to my therapist at school, I've been seeing her for a few weeks now and she is helping me with my problems. As for dealing with having HPV, it's getting better since I talked to my Mom and going to the campus therapist. I still have troubles dealing with it but I am starting to get there. It can only get better right? Thanks for asking Katt. I am glad to see that you are also doing better. We can get through this. What kinds of things do you talk to your therapist about? IF you don't mind me asking. Maybe through your thoughts it could help me out as well. TTYL peeps.

     
    Old 06-09-2004, 06:53 AM   #35
    Gtpchic31
    Senior Member
     
    Gtpchic31's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2003
    Location: michigan,USA
    Posts: 221
    Gtpchic31 HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Im glad you went to the doctor. I knowmany people with endometriosis. SOmetimes i wonderif i also have it but my gyno doesnt want to put metrhough a laproscopy for no reason. I guess he doesnt think that thecause of my craming. I hopeallgoes good with your ultrasound. Take care

     
    Old 06-09-2004, 12:49 PM   #36
    Katttob
    Member
     
    Katttob's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Apr 2004
    Posts: 75
    Katttob HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Beez,
    Iam glad to hear you went into the doctor to get checked out.
    Iam also glad to hear that you are seeking therapy. I know that my therapy has helped me sooo much with all that I going on in my life. A few of the things I am working through with my therapist are, the feeling of guilt and why I feel that why, why this happened to ME, some good things that have happend to me in result to my diagnosis. One of the hardest parts of all of this has been making HPV become part of my identity and let it me real in my life. My life seems so serile the past 4 months, and it has been especially hard for me to be around my friends because they are so reckless with their lives (having different sex partners, drinking heavily, all things I don't do) but seems like nothing ever happens to them, but his happend to me. It is hard for me to make sense of that sometimes. So for a while all I wanted to do was be alone but at the same time I hated myself so it was very emotional for me to be alone. But I have overcome that now and trying to except that HPV is part of who I am.
    I hope that one day I will be able to go without thinking about if I have cancer on my cervix or if I am developing a new wart and I hope that for all of you who also have HPV can do the same!
    Best luck to you, keep me posted on your test results beez!

     
    Old 06-09-2004, 04:12 PM   #37
    Gtpchic31
    Senior Member
     
    Gtpchic31's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jun 2003
    Location: michigan,USA
    Posts: 221
    Gtpchic31 HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Ihave a question to you that have had the cryofreezing done. I had mine done almost 2 weeks ago. I had bright red blood spotting a few days ago then it went away, not i am spotting again and its heavier. I called the doctor with the first spotting and they said it wasnt anything to worry about. I also have had these cramps almost all the time.I was just wondering if this is all normal.

     
    Old 06-09-2004, 08:27 PM   #38
    beezkneez
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    beezkneez's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2004
    Location: Near Knoxville Tennessee
    Posts: 170
    beezkneez HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Katttob
    Beez,
    One of the hardest parts of all of this has been making HPV become part of my identity and let it be real in my life. My life seems so serile the past 4 months, and it has been especially hard for me to be around my friends because they are so reckless with their lives (having different sex partners, drinking heavily, all things I don't do) but seems like nothing ever happens to them, but his happend to me. It is hard for me to make sense of that sometimes. But I have overcome that now and trying to except that HPV is part of who I am.
    I hope that one day I will be able to go without thinking about if I have cancer on my cervix or if I am developing a new wart and I hope that for all of you who also have HPV can do the same!
    Best luck to you, keep me posted on your test results beez!
    Yes Katt, I know exactly how you feel. But since going to therapy I've learned that bad things happen to the best of people. My friends are the same as yours and it is hard for me to be around them doing all these things. I just want to tell them all the things that they could be getting themselves into but yet I don't want to tell them that I have HPV and as a result of it I live in shame and I would have rather someone ripped my heart out then to tell me that I am a carrier of HPV now. But as you said, it is part of who I am now and there is nothing I can do to change it all I can do is accept it. Thank you Katt, I'll let you know what's up as I know.

     
    Old 06-10-2004, 12:09 PM   #39
    Katttob
    Member
     
    Katttob's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Apr 2004
    Posts: 75
    Katttob HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Gtpchic,
    I have freezing on my cervix about a month ago. I had a little bit of spotting afterwards but, I started my period 4 days after, so I couldn't really tell how long I had spotting for.
    My doctor did tell me that spotting (heavy or light) could happen.
    And I did have cramps for a few weeks after the freezing.

     
    Old 08-17-2004, 01:05 AM   #40
    beezkneez
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    beezkneez's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2004
    Location: Near Knoxville Tennessee
    Posts: 170
    beezkneez HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    I would like to announce that since I had my surgery and diagnosis of hpv in January that I am beginning to deal with it alot better. For the first few months it was constantly on my mind and now I feel as though I don't think about it as much. From time to time it crosses my mind but it has disapated. How is everyone else? Any problems....
    __________________
    ~Knowledge is the best medicine.~

     
    Old 08-17-2004, 09:12 PM   #41
    rebekkabobekka
    Senior Member
     
    rebekkabobekka's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jan 2004
    Location: A Small town in Ohio
    Posts: 116
    rebekkabobekka HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Hey Beez!

    It's been awhile since I have been on here..I have felt like crap...because of my Hypo thyroidism...but now it's getting under control!! thank God!!!
    I am glad you are doing better...I knew you would pull through just fine...it's just the "shock" period that you have to get through...Like I said it's been years and years for me since I was told about my HPV and I honestly do not think about it at all anymore...and haven't for years..as long as i keep getting normal paps I don't worry about it...and as I said I have 2 children...never had any complications from HPV when I had them...and I am married...and as far as I know my hubby has never gotten the virus.. have u found out anymore about endometriosis? I also have that..as i have gotten older it have gotten worse...Periods about kill me...they hurt sooooo bad...but they still feel like it is to soon to take everything out... I swear with the endo and the thyroid cancer I had my family really screwed me over..lol gotta love the heredity thing..lol
    Anyway...It's great to know that you are doing well...and pulling through all of this....you'll be just fine!!
    hope to talk to you soon!
    Bekka

    Last edited by rebekkabobekka; 08-17-2004 at 09:14 PM.

     
    Old 08-18-2004, 09:55 PM   #42
    PBABY
    Veteran
    (female)
     
    PBABY's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2004
    Posts: 425
    PBABY HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Hi everybody!

    I am new. I've posted on a few boards throughout the day today, but I must say that this one has been the most interesting. I was diagnosed with HPV in 2000 and had to have one day surgery to have the "bad cells" removed via laser. When my OB/GYN told me what I had, I really didn't think much of it. I had never even heard of HPV until that day. I don't know, but I just didn't seem to worried about it. I guess b/c he told me that mine was a Level ! (if that makes any sense) and therefore, the "bad cells" could be removed via laser. However, he did tell me that if I didn't have the laser surgery that they could develop into cancer. Obviously, I had the surgery. Had a follow up papsmear, and everything was normal. In 2001, I had my annual exam again, and everything was fine. In 2002, it came back. This time the HPV was so mild that my OB/GYN treated it in his office by applying some kind of acid or something directly to my cervix. Had a follow up papsmear after that. and everything was fine. In 2003, everything was fine with my annual exam. I go for this year's annual in a few weeks. I hope everything is still fine. But I guess my reply to the OP is this-me, personally, I was not devastated when I found out I had HPV. That could be b/c 1) It was something that physically didn't bother me with any of its symptoms and 2) It could be dealt with, for the most part. I know it can lead to more severe health related issues. I am not blind to that, but I guess maybe it's just me and the type of person that I am that I'm not phased by it. Maybe b/c HPV is not a well-known subject/topic? Who knows...I do know I have it. But one thing my OB/GYN told me was this-It does come from having multiple partners (I'm not sure if he meant multiple partners at the same time) and obviously, unprotected sex. Ashamed to say that I fell into both categories. When I was first diagnosed, I did have multiple partners that I was sexual active with. After my first surgery, I changed my sexual habits and limited myself to 1 or 2 partners and used protection, most of the time. I know I know....But when I had finally met someone that I wanted to be with and only with them, that was when my HPV subsided, and it has not returned. I know it is probably "lying dormant" or whatever. I know it's not going to go away.

    Bottom line though, don't be ashamed you have it. I know that there a lot worse things you could have. Learning to live with a virus, disease, or any other ailment that is incurable (sp?) is hard. But the first part of dealing with it is accepting the fact you have it. If you can accept it, you've gotten over the hardest part. Take care!!

     
    Old 08-18-2004, 11:17 PM   #43
    beezkneez
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    beezkneez's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Feb 2004
    Location: Near Knoxville Tennessee
    Posts: 170
    beezkneez HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by PBABY
    I have posted on a few boards throughout the day today, but I must say that this one has been the most interesting. I really didn't think much of it. I had never even heard of HPV until that day. I don't know, but I just didn't seem to worried about it. I guess b/c he told me that mine was a Level ! But I guess my reply to the OP is this-me, personally, I was not devastated when I found out I had HPV. That could be b/c 1) It was something that physically didn't bother me with any of its symptoms and 2) It could be dealt with, for the most part. I know it can lead to more severe health related issues. I am not blind to that, but I guess maybe it's just me and the type of person that I am that I'm not phased by it. Maybe b/c HPV is not a well-known subject/topic? Who knows...I do know I have it. But one thing my OB/GYN told me was this-It does come from having multiple partners (I'm not sure if he meant multiple partners at the same time) and obviously, unprotected sex.

    Bottom line though, don't be ashamed you have it. I know that there a lot worse things you could have. Learning to live with a virus, disease, or any other ailment that is incurable (sp?) is hard. But the first part of dealing with it is accepting the fact you have it. If you can accept it, you've gotten over the hardest part. Take care!!
    Pbaby, having hpv is different for every person who has it, just as that person is different from every other person. It affects us all in different ways. I have only been with one person, and he did have other partners before me, and suprisingly I got hpv. I felt so dirty to have an STD. I know that it isn't so serious as long as I keep a check on it but it is just having an std that will NEVER GO AWAY.
    There are over a hundred strands of hpv and some are more serious than others. You can catch hpv without even being sexually active. Just skin to skin contact and you can get it. The thing is, and I am not trying to argue or start anything, it is easy to say don't be ashamed but it is not so easy to deal with it. It is just the fact that I have an STD now and it's not like chlamidia that can be cured with a little medicine. I had half of my cervix cut out (cone biopsy surgery) because of this virus because I had a high risk stand. I am a good person, I've never cheated, I am with the man that I love above all men, and he is the only person that I have been sexually active with, so why was I infected with this virus? He has no symptoms because with the strand I have, men don't get it but they are carriers and pass it on to female partners.
    So why me, is the thing that I have to live with everyday and yes, I am learning to live with it but my first reaction when I sat in the gyno office and he told me that I have hpv I was devistated, heavy with guilt, and ashamed. I have to worry about if my cone biopsy surgery will affect me having children in the future. Will the scar tissue make my cervix too weak to carry a child? And that is hard to think about....not being able to have a child of my own because of a simple little virus.
    I appreciate your post here. And I am glad that you are able to deal with having hpv. It takes some of us a long time to get to where you are. But for some of us it is hard and we are all trying to stick together and help each other out. If you have any other comments on how to deal with hpv or if you have any info about hpv that you would like to share then please, continue to post. We want you here. Everyday we learn something new about this virus and inform each other to help deal with it. I am sorry if this post offends you. By no means do I want it to. I just want you to understand that it is harder for some of us. So please understand. Best wishes and be safe!

    Last edited by beezkneez; 08-18-2004 at 11:27 PM.

     
    Old 08-19-2004, 11:11 AM   #44
    PBABY
    Veteran
    (female)
     
    PBABY's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2004
    Posts: 425
    PBABY HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    beezkneez,

    I am not offended by your post, and I deeply apologize if I came across as insensitive to your coping with HPV. I truly did not mean it in that way at all. Yes, it is hard to deal with an STD b/c I have one besides just the HPV. I have herpes, and yes, I have a hard time dealing with that. So I totally understand how you feel. I guess that feelings towards my HPV aren't as...."strong" as they are towards the herpes. And I guess that's just me. I think your feelings toward your HPV are similar to my feelings toward my herpes. Herpes has devastated me, so I know what you're going through-it's just a different STD. I know we are all different and feel different about certain things. I was diagnosed with HPV before I was diagnosed with herpes. Yes, I was initially shocked that I had gotten an STD (referring to HPV). But I think the main reason I was so passive about it was b/c 1) I had never heard of it and 2) there really was no (that I was aware of) "social stigma" attached to it, like herpes, AIDS, and other well known STD's. That may sound vain, ignorant, or immature, but that was how I felt about it. I know A LOT of people who have never heard of HPV. I have friends who are my age (some older, some younger) that have been diagnosed with it recently, and they have never heard of it. Initially, when I was diagnosed with it, I did feel ashamed. I felt like my past had finally caught up with me. I know that is not the case with you. I'm just telling you my story. I also got HPV from a carrier. Who it was, I don't know. But I do think about it and when I do, it makes me ashamed of how I had behaved (sexually) in the past. But it is something I have to live with. On the multiple partners thing, I wasn't implying that you had been with multiple people, so PLEASE don't think that. I was basically referring to myself (read the sentence after that in my first post). When I think about having both HPV and herpes now, yes, I am ashamed. It was hard telling my current boyfriend. But even though he knows, I am still ashamed. Yes, it's hard. I reflect on what I did in the past and learn from it and try not to make those mistakes again in the future. I know that's kinda hard to do when it comes to STD's-especially the ones that have no cure. My advice-take care of yourself now, eat healthy, stay in tune with your body and listen to it. When I hear of a friend or someone else I know say that have recently been diagnosed with HPV, I know what they're talking about. They are SO surprised. They have never heard of it. And I think that just goes to show that not information is being put out about HPV. Just about everybody knows about the "regular" STD's that are out there-herpes, AIDS, gonorrhea, chlymadia, crabs, warts, etc. We all know about those. But do you ever see HPV mentioned? I know I haven't. I think that that is something doctors need to tell their patients. HPV is out there. People need to know that it can be deadly if left untreated, and they need to know how you get it.

    But I just wanted to reply to you, beezkneez, and let you know that I am sorry if I came across as insensitive to you. That was definitely not my intention. Just be strong, and be in control of your body at all times. YOU know your body better than anyone. Okay? I'll be looking for more of your posts. Take care!!!

    Last edited by PBABY; 08-19-2004 at 12:10 PM.

     
    Old 08-19-2004, 11:35 AM   #45
    LadyLuck1980
    Member
    (female)
     
    LadyLuck1980's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Aug 2004
    Posts: 76
    LadyLuck1980 HB User
    Re: HPV & Guilt

    Hi All...This message is to ALL:
    I have had HPV since i was almost 19. I got it from a Guy who didnt know he had it either. I have never had warts or had any ubnormal paps after it was first diagnosed. I have never had leeps, cones, or any procedure done. My Doctor said that it may have dissolved itself. I still get my pap's twice a year like most people with HPV. As a matter of fact i had a pap yesterday, i am still waiting for my results. Question is, is it possible that my HPV could have dissapeared? could it be that the virus is still in me, just sleeping maybe?. Does anyone in here have or have heard of a similar HPV situation where Warts never appear? what would you think my HPV would classified as? I am married now, my husband and i dont use condoms, he has never had an outbreak, which i thank God. He has been checked for STD's and they never found HPV in him. I have never told him about the HPV, my doc said i didnt have to, so i never did...
    Thanks!

    Last edited by LadyLuck1980; 08-19-2004 at 11:36 AM.

     
    Closed Thread

    Related Topics
    Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
    Pain & Depression lifeaftr40 Pain Management 9 11-10-2008 10:51 PM
    Your experience w/nh decision & your loved one's transition LuvMyLilDoggie Alzheimer's Disease & Dementia 10 01-07-2006 08:46 PM
    Degenerative Discs & Pain Management goody2shuz Back Problems 357 08-16-2005 05:36 PM




    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Search this Thread:

    Advanced Search

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is Off
    HTML code is Off
    Trackbacks are Off
    Pingbacks are Off
    Refbacks are Off




    Sign Up Today!

    Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

    I want my free account

    All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:39 PM.





    © 2022 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
    Do not copy or redistribute in any form!