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    Old 07-08-2012, 02:57 AM   #1
    Girlinadilemma
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    Question Oral Sex and HPV?

    OK! So I just needed to ask a few questions because I've succeeded in freaking myself out trying to do research on my own.

    1. Does HPV cause oral cancer?

    2. Is it likely to spread from genitals to mouth?

    3. If "yes" to question number one what would be the best case do you think? Not perform/receive oral sex (if you or your partner or both have HPV)? Or use condoms/dental dams?

    4. Seriously who here uses condoms/dental dam for oral sex? The thought of the smell of latex is making me ill...


    I am just curious. I have high risk hpv (the type that cause dysplasia on the cervix). My bf has genital warts. He fears me giving him cancer/him giving me cancer via oral sex so he refuses to engage in it. I'm not very happy with this scenario but if it really is going to put our lives in danger I guess I understand. But I kind of feel like it's not a big deal...

     
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    Old 07-08-2012, 05:05 AM   #2
    rphinkle
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Girlinadilemma View Post
    OK! So I just needed to ask a few questions because I've succeeded in freaking myself out trying to do research on my own.

    1. Does HPV cause oral cancer?

    2. Is it likely to spread from genitals to mouth?

    3. If "yes" to question number one what would be the best case do you think? Not perform/receive oral sex (if you or your partner or both have HPV)? Or use condoms/dental dams?

    4. Seriously who here uses condoms/dental dam for oral sex? The thought of the smell of latex is making me ill...


    I am just curious. I have high risk hpv (the type that cause dysplasia on the cervix). My bf has genital warts. He fears me giving him cancer/him giving me cancer via oral sex so he refuses to engage in it. I'm not very happy with this scenario but if it really is going to put our lives in danger I guess I understand. But I kind of feel like it's not a big deal...

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 05:08 AM   #3
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    Smile Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    My wife and I have had the exact same situation besides she is the one weirded out and I am not that concerned, if you get an answer please pass it along.

    Thanks for posting I will do the same with my post!

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 09:35 AM   #4
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    #1 & #2:
    Yes it's possible but it's extremely rare. It usually only happens in people who are immune compromised such as someone with AIDs

    #3:
    Oral sex is pleasurable. If you like oral sex, continue to do it. Unprotected oral sex is a lower risk than that unprotected intercourse & anal for stds, however, it is still a risk. It's up to you to decide w/ you want to do.

    #4:
    You can buy non-latex barrier products. You can buy flavoured/scented condoms. I don't know about flavoured/scented dental dams, but you can cut condom to make a dam.

    Last edited by Discovering; 07-08-2012 at 09:37 AM.

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 10:04 AM   #5
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    Thank you for the information! I really appreciate it. Now here's hoping my boyfriend will understand. Wish me luck!

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 10:58 AM   #6
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    I also want to thank you! Not sure how my wife is going to react, but we will see!
    This may not be appropriate - not sure - sorta personal, but you two are being very helpful, see if you can explain to a man how a woman could not understand a man likes and has a need for oral sex and how could a women not like a man performing it on her! I dont get it, maybe you two can enlighten me! Help! I like a full inhibited relationship and do not understand.

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 11:03 AM   #7
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    not inhibited - uninhibited. I also should have explained I have just as much of a desire in the giving part of it as receiving.

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 11:27 AM   #8
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    The following questions may be a bit personal so I apologize in advance.

    1. Who in the relationship has hpv?
    2. Does she not want to receive or give? Or both?

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 11:35 AM   #9
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    She has HPV and I have genital warts,which has been awhile. Both are under control, she has a huge fear of getting herpes of the mouth or HPV orally (I think) she does not like discussing this at all, I am very open about the entire thing. She used to be fine with giving but not to the point of me feeling like she was excited about it even though she has commented to that effect. I know she says she does not like receiving, which I love to do! She is a very beautiful women in all ways! I have done this several times in the past and I think she did it for me, and I truly think it feels good, but again she says she does not like it!
    This is a ten year relationship where it ended shortly after marriage, about the same time the HPV came up!

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 12:10 PM   #10
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by rphinkle View Post
    She has HPV and I have genital warts,which has been awhile. Both are under control, she has a huge fear of getting herpes of the mouth or HPV orally (I think) she does not like discussing this at all, I am very open about the entire thing. She used to be fine with giving but not to the point of me feeling like she was excited about it even though she has commented to that effect. I know she says she does not like receiving, which I love to do! She is a very beautiful women in all ways! I have done this several times in the past and I think she did it for me, and I truly think it feels good, but again she says she does not like it!
    This is a ten year relationship where it ended shortly after marriage, about the same time the HPV came up!
    Wow sounds like me and my boyfriend, except HE doesn't like discussing it and I'm open to discussion. I think researching or googling anything can freak a person out. All the articles I read where in big captions HPV PASSED THROUGH ORAL SEX then in fine print it says it's very rare to pass it. Your are more likely to get pregnant (or get someone pregnant in your cause) using a condom then getting HPV through oral sex. I like to look at things this way which my bf fails to see. You both have hpv, to me it makes things easier then say being with someone who doesn't have hpv. And honestly I feel like everyone has it because 80% of sexually active people have HPV, some just don't know it. Maybe she really doesn't like it? Does not like because she has HPV? I don't know I find it odd that a girl doesn't like oral sex unless there's a reason. If she's scared about the transmission of herpes or HPV she needs to understand there's a chance she already has it if you guys engage in regular sex, even with protection because those two viruses spread via skin to skin contact.

     
    Old 07-08-2012, 12:18 PM   #11
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    You answered just like I thought you would. I just can't see anyone not liking it either way! I wished she would open up and talk about it! I think when two people open up to each other both emotionally and physically it makes the bond so much stronger. I truly appreciate your help sometimes it just helps to talk to someone and know you are not alone. I am older than you and I hope you get your situation straightened out, life is short and you need to get all you can out of it! That is all I am trying to do for both my wife and myself. I truly enjoy making her happy and hope she allows it in any form she can. Let me know how it goes with BF maybe we can help each other through it. You may not be religious but I will pray for you and BF's situation. I think God made us to be uninhibited with the one we love and devote our own life. Good Luck on your end and thanks again!

     
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    Old 07-08-2012, 12:23 PM   #12
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    Your welcome. Thank you and good luck to you too!

     
    Old 07-09-2012, 02:29 PM   #13
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    I have been freaking myself out, as well, via the internet. I have been searching endlessly about oral sex transmission and it seems there ARE stories out there of people getting HPV orally. Then, I read that it is rare. My GP also said it was rare and not to worry, but I am!! So, really, what is the verdict? Did you talk with a doctor or did you just decide its not worth worrying about? I agree with you, I think that most people have HPV, so all of this really shouldn't be a big deal, but for some reason, it is. I have OCD and I have been making myself SICK over all of this. This may be TMI, but my bf and I discovered his first HPV wart WHILE I was performing oral on him. Since that time (a week ago), I have had a sore throat and my gum, close to where I got my wisdom teeth removed, is super sore. Every little tingle, dullness, sore-feeling is making me immediately suspect warts in my mouth. I am waiting to see my doctor until my test results are in for herpes, so I am killing myself by researching online, which I know is a bad I idea, but I still freaking do it. UGH!

     
    Old 07-09-2012, 02:56 PM   #14
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    I am married and we really had a good time together, then all this seemed to end it! It should not have for two reasons, if my wife had HIV or Herpes I love her enough that I would take the disease along with her to live a full life without worrying. I took her for life till death, so here is my thought! First dont have sex with someone you are not positive you will spend your entire life with, if you do what happens to the one you end up married to if he is different - then you have put all that past on that relationship which will be a strain! And if you love them that much get married and then forget all the crap and just live life together to its fullest. The best I can do from been there done it all and have been around for a while. The intimacy between a husband and wife should be sacred and very special between two only for life, if not what is there to expect from a new love if you have experienced it all already?

     
    Old 07-09-2012, 03:53 PM   #15
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    Re: Oral Sex and HPV?

    I agree with you in some respects. First, I agree that when you marry someone, you take them for all they are and for all that will happen. If you discover you have genital warts or HIV, or cancer, whatever, a truly devoted mate will stick by you. I think that all too often, people do not take marriage seriously enough and when the going gets tough, they bail. However, this is really not the topic of the thread, although I do wish you the best in your predicament.

    Next, you basically say that one should not have sex with someone unless they will be marrying them. I don't exactly agree with you on this. There are not many people who are willing to wait until they find "the one" and who knows if that person will really end up being the one you will spend the rest of your life with. I am also not a good gambler. I am not willing to just hope the person I am marrying will be compatible with me sexually. And if they are not? I am stuck in a marriage that will be unhappy, as sex is one of the most important elements to a relationship. Also, where do you think all of this HPV and STD crap came from? It is from people having more than one sexual partner. If you or your wife (I forget who has HPV) has this virus, it means you had sex with someone other than your marriage partner. So, basically you are taking the stance of a hypocrite (sorry, that sounds harsh). I have read many times on this board that if you have had 3 sexual partners, you most likely have HPV. Statistically, this means that either you have had at least 3 sexual partners or you are just super unlucky. Now, I said I didn't entirely disagree with you. I think that if we all drastically reduced the amount of sexual partners we have, we may not have so many issues with HPV, herpes, etc. I have only had 4 sexual partners and I always thought this was a pretty small number, but since after 3 partners you are very highly likely to have HPV, four is still too great.

    Really, what is there to do? We can preach safe sex, because people will never stop having it, but safe sex does not really prevent HPV or herpes. I think instead of trying NOT to get HPV, we need to be educated on how to treat it and be healthy if you get an outbreak. It is just too inevitable to catch this. We need to learn how to live with it.

     
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