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  • Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

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    Old 03-29-2005, 06:53 PM   #1
    SorryForBreath
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    Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

    Sheesh.....We've been trying and trying and trying....then 16 year old
    fertile as h*&@ sister gets pregnant! Ugh! She found out today that it's
    a little boy....first boy in the family in almost fifty years.....I'm excited
    and, at the same time, feeling FURIOUS and WRONGED! She's not ready,
    wasn't trying and yet, God feels the need to bless her while so many of
    us struggle and hurt! I feel horrible for being so selfish, but it hurts soooo
    bad! I am trying to be happy for her, and AM, but at the same time I feel
    like it's soooooo incredibly unfair! I've been pondering Ovulex.....any insight?
    We've tried almost everything else (5 years) and I've reached the point of
    trying to accept what's happened and be happy for all others....give up on
    what I want more than ANYthing in this world! I feel torn in a million directions
    and finding this board and realizing that I'm not alone has given me a little
    comfort Just venting I guess.....maybe secretly thinking that, if I dump
    all of the guilt onto you guys, then I will have someone to hold up my
    "Ice Water 25 Cents" sign in Hell.....? J/K......Best of luck to you all!

     
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    Old 03-29-2005, 08:22 PM   #2
    Jayme82
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    Re: Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

    My younger brother got his girlfriend pregnant about a year ago and I was devastated! I could not understand how it was that they were able to get pregnant when they did not have anything to their names and didn't even have jobs while my DH and I had been trying so hard for so long to get PG. Now they have had a baby girl and she is 3 months old and I could not love her anymore and she is truely and angel. I guess everything happens for a reason although so many times it just does not seem fair! Hang in there and like Sasha said, do your fair share of crying to get it out and then try as best as you can to be there for her because I cannot imagine being 16 and getting pregnant, she is probably completely terrified even if she does not show it. Good luck to you!

    Jayme

     
    Old 03-29-2005, 11:48 PM   #3
    Lil'Pea
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    Re: Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

    Oh boy, is this ever the post for me! I have one daughter, 9 years old....and have been ttc for 8years. My younger sister got pregnant with her second child at the epicenter of all my heartache....the kicker? She had already given up her first child to our mom and didn't want the second one either. She didn't know who the father was and admitted that she didn't want to be a mother. So she decided to let me and my husband adopt him. Then she met a new guy who badly wanted children and talked her into changing her mind. Can you guess how upset I was?? lol......since then, she has had another child...she is just 23. Now? Her and her husband are using drugs intraveneously. Her children are completely neglected, don't get fed regular meals, she locks them in thier room while she sleeps in until noon (none of this is an exhageration), they pee all over thier bedrooms and then get punished for it even though they are not able to get out to use the restroom....and YES we are involving the authorities. Right now, the oldest is 6 and staying with me, and the others may be on the way. It is good in some ways because they need out of that house, but at the same time, it is the most stressful thing i have ever had to deal with. These children are very troubled and difficult and confused about family....i know time will change most of this, but i am scared to death!! And through all these years, I have been ttc and praying my heart out for another child, she is having them like crazy and doesn't even want them! Can anyone make sense out of the injustice of it? I am a christian woman and believe that God has plans for each of us....but let me tell you; when I get to heaven that will be the first thing i will want to know!! I don't understand all the wonderful couples ttc and all the unwanted teen pregnancies and abortion....

    Gee, i am sorry this is so long and such....it truly is a blessing to know that none of us are alone....

    Any pointers or suggestions on dealing with previously abused and neglected children?? How about pointers on coping with the emotional pain of AF coming every month??

    Thanks for the venting session!!

     
    Old 03-30-2005, 12:05 AM   #4
    Living4Him
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    Re: Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

    Lil'Pea,

    Just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear your story! I too am a Christian and just wonder a lot about what goes on in this world. I guess it's just not heaven yet. A friend of mine took on an abused child for about a year. Luckily her mom got her act together and got to take her back. My friend had the child go to a counselor right away. I would definitely recommend that. It probably wouldn't hurt for you and your DH to see a counselor as well, to help deal with this situation. Maybe even a counselor from your church could help. You sound very caring and I'm sure the children will be blessed to be with you. Ask for help and take it when offered.

    As for AF coming every month, I don't know what to say. This is only our 6th month of trying, but I'm very frustrated. I have been blessed with 5 boys, but still long for another baby. Sorry if that sounds selfish. I've read posts from people saying the feeling is the same whether it is your 2nd, 3rd, 6th, etc. I must agree. But some people do wonder why I can't just be satisfied with what I have. I feel like God has put this on my heart to have another baby, I love being a mom and adore my children. But only time will tell if it will happen.

    Sorry I haven't read your other posts so I don't know, but have you been going through infertility treatment? I may start Clomid next month.

    I will pray for you! Take care!

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 04:45 PM   #5
    SorryForBreath
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    Re: Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

    Thank you all for your advice and understanding. I think that it's easy for anyone who's NOT in the situation to judge - to say that I should just be happy for my Sister and put my feelings aside. I am trying to do EXACTLY that, it's just extremely hard at times. I love my Sister more than anything in the world and I WILL be there for her at all times. I guess occasionally it just helps to be selfish and vent to people who understand the pain and frustration of it all! Lil Pea, you sound like you have your hands full! I am sorry to hear about what you are dealing with.....no one should ever be forced to step into the shoes that you have! I can only imagine what a nightmare you're going through - I can only believe that your heart is being pulled in a thousand directions! About the only advice I can offer is BE THERE! Be there for your nieces/nephews (which it sounds like you are) and, as difficult as it may be, I would pursue involving the authorities.....the result isn't always what you hope for but, in the end, it's better for the children. I wish you the best of luck with your struggle :-) Again, I thank you all for your kind words and support - infertility is an excruciating thing for couples to go through.......it makes me feel a little better - not to know that you're suffering, but to know that we don't suffer alone. Lots of Luck and Prayers!

     
    Old 04-05-2005, 06:03 AM   #6
    jensta
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    Thumbs up Re: Little Sister Pregnant....I feel so....ANGRY!

    hi my partner and i have been ttc for nearly2 years now and it hasn`t happened for us either.i had i mc just after my 17th birthday and since nthing.all my friends have had babies 1 left hers as she was bored 1 got rid of hers then concieved the nx month 1 lost hers and is trying to sleep with any fella she meets till it happens again ,my sister fell pg by mistake and made up some ****** she was raped when it didnt happen so had abortion and a close m8 who said she would never have kids is pg too,oh and not to mention h2b sister and sis in law have just both had boys a couple of weeks ago and both wernt planned as 1 has a 9 mnth and 1 a 13 mnth baby!!!!!!
    sorry to gabble luv but i am so knowing how you feeling!!!after 5 years of asking for tests fineally i found out i got pcos and dont know where to turn.everywhere i do theres a baby 5 and its cutting me up inside.all i wana do is cy as the peeps who cant look after babys have them and all i want is a family and i seem to be being punished.just try keep a brave faceitwill happen 1 day and when it does just remember you can do a much better job than them and you will truely respect your kids.
    god bless

     
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