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  • to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

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    Old 03-30-2005, 11:25 AM   #1
    rmc12
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    to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi Molly,

    Got your post on the other thread but thought I'd start another peri anxiety one as it seems to be a prevalent thing for all of us!!

    Thanks for your posting and I did write you another note (don't know if you saw it) under the Happy Birthday Molly thread. In it I mentioned I was doing a bit better, and am trying to quell the anxiety.

    I have read the posts too regarding the colonoscopy and that is not as bad as we think and that is what I have heard too from others. As I mentioned to the person who had it in her 30s and they found pre cancerous polyps, I do understand that it is important for preventative measures. She asked me and others in her last post (you may have seen it) why so many of us are so worked up over this one exam. she has had more than a few and sees it as a routine thing like our paps or mammograms. Which of course she is right. I do not know how to explain to her or anyone why I or anyone gets so stressed over that exam or others.

    Jude replied to me that she had this kind of anxiety and waited till 50 to get her mammogram. Certainly they say we all should do it at 40 or older but you know sometimes we are just so stressed we cannot function right or how we normally would. I appreciated hearing her struggle with the mammogram as it seems to be mine with the colonoscopy. You are right it is the fear of the unknown perhaps that gets to us all, I don't know. I do think the kind of peri anxiety I am having is NOT like what I go thru normally with my routine tests. SO I do think if i had never had a pap at this age or a mammogram I would be stressing about those too or if I had to get a heart stress test (which I have not had and they recommend too for over 50) I'd be stressing the same way as my anxiety is higher than it normally is. So it is not just the usual type of stress if you know what I mean nor perhaps that specific exam.

    As you said since my insurance and a lot of others also are not covering it all it just is something that one waits on in that case, and I hope that it is not going to be harmful to do so but am trying not to stress. The person at the clinic went thru symptoms with me as she knew my insurance did not cover it fully and it was just routine and although one does not want to wait for bad symptoms of course, I do know that there are some to look for. I do not have them. And if I was whether it is covered or not, one goes to get it done whatever the exam. You are right that most doctors suggest it at 50 or over as a baseline and the person at the clinic did say there are a lot of people who come in at any time in their 50s. Anyway, I am trying to just focus on the fact that it is no different than last year, as far as coverage and also I am not feeling any different than last year either as far as symptoms. It was mentioned routinely if it is covered, that is all.

    Regarding my anxiety and fatigue , yes trying to work on that. I am less fatigued and I think that is because I am trying to be less stressed. Stressing can sure drain you!! lol!! I do not feel as stable emotionally as I was let's say last June thru this Jan. and feel somewhat like I did last year, early in the year, when I had a bad bout of peri anxiety/stress. It is interesting you had those symtpoms too.

    The fatigue I have heard so many talk about, and some say it is "crashing fatigue" I have only felt that when I am stressing and feeling emotionally unfit with my anxiety or right before my period or when I should be getting my period at times. You said Penny is experiencing fatigue and I know others are too. Refresh my memory about when you last got your period? Mine was this month and it was at day 27, before that at day 49.

    As far as what my anxiety feels like : I do sometimes get the internal shakiness you are talking about, like being nervous from the inside out. It is not like I am shaking (although that happened to me once last month), but it is that I feel emotionally shaky when I stress. I just obsess more too and when I do my hands get kind of cold and I feel very tired by it all.

    I do find that in the morning when I wake up it is worse as far as feeling anxious or down. I focus on things, like if I have gas I focus on that as a for instance. i am trying to get out of that!! I did that last year and it did fade so hopefully it will this time!!

    I am taking the xanax as it was recommended to me, which is more regular and that is what I did last year and then weaned off of it and was fine in doing so. The doctor was not concerned with the way I am taking it and it does help, yes. Helps more so when I am at home and can take a full one. I can't take a full one usually during the day as it makes me a bit drowsy. I am sleeping fine. Last night I did not take one at night and I slept fine.(I took one after dinner). Takes awhile at times to get to sleep but as a rule I sleep okay.

    Thanks for thinking of me and asking about me. How are you doing??????

    thanks for all your help always. It is calming to me!!

    rmc

     
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    Old 03-30-2005, 02:36 PM   #2
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi RMC,
    I think I'll stick with this thread and make my replies to you...things are getting a bit confusing for the old lady (me)! here (LOL!)...

    As with the colonoscopy - I agree with Jude in one of her postings that often the first time, things are scary. We are often not just fearful of the test itself, but often also fearful of the results. Let's face it, as we get older, we know we are going to have deal w/more health issues which means probably more drs. appts., tests, results, even hospitalization, and so forth. This is why I dread getting older but I know there's absolutely nothing I can do about it either. We are still at the age when we can take some preventive measures (healthy eating, exercise, safety, etc.) so that we can all live a ripeful old age without too much suffering. Good genes have a lot to do with things too. Sometimes things just happens too and no one knows why. So you can't be worrying and prediciting you might have something just b/c you know someone else did. Each person's lifestyle and health condition is different too. I have faith in you to get the colonscopy when you are ready. In the meantime, don't feel bad or guilty if you don't have it done right now. I am still waiting to hear back from the receptionist to schedule my appt.

    As with your anxiety - try taking big deep breaths! Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Concentrate on your breathing so you don't focus on the anxiety. I find that taking deep breaths help a lot! Also, when you have a chance, try to meditate a little - sit up and close your eyes and think of nothing. Do this in a quiet room. When I was suffering from anxiety, these are some of the things I did. I also got a relaxation tape for anxiety which I listened to at night when laying in bed. The voice is often soothing and teaches you to relax.

    You asked when I had my last period. It was in June 04 and prior to that it was Nov. 03. So, I think I am right in target with my menopause - my mom went thru it at age 52 - the same age that I am now. You should be easing off of yours pretty soon, esp. if you've been at day 49 plus you're soon to be 51. Do you know when you mom went thru hers?

    When I was feeling really bad, I too was very obsessed with how I was feeling. I didn't find this board at that time and I thought I alone w/these symtpoms and had every living disease out there. I kept notes to see if there was any chance of any pattern - but there wasn't. Out of the 5 mos. when I was at my worse, I only had my period 2 out of those 5 mos. I didn't feel better even then. But, things did get better so tell yourself it's just menopause!! Try not to dwell on how you're feeling (easier said than done, but try!).

    You asked how I am doing. I'm fine - I really should be working some! LOL! These boards can get addicting!!

    RMC is strong and tough and will survive!

    molly

     
    Old 03-30-2005, 09:43 PM   #3
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Thought I'd sneak in on the anxious old chookies section hehehehe. Molly you're a legend sticking around to let us know we can get through this and revert to feeling normal again. Oh to wake up one morning full of life, feeling like the sexy old Granny I felt like just a few short months ago. I am suffering from lack of enthusiasm for life these days. Each day seems to be a chore. I'm happy enough in my own way, but don't have motivation to do much at all. e.g. I love cooking, and right now it is dinner time - and I couldn't care less whether we eat today, tomorrow or next week! I seem to sigh a lot lol. As for sex, I'd happily read a book while he got on with it. I've always been a rather enthusiastic partner, and so hope the libido hits again with full force.

    My periods recently went to manageable Oct, Nov and Dec, with no flooding yayyyy - nothing for 65 days - then my lightest ever, and 26 days later the heaviest of my life. I'm already dreading Sunday which is when it is due again, although so far no warning signs! I'm 51, and my Mum always used to say she was 52 when she went through menopause, which I presume means her last period.

    As for the anxiety, like you, my answer to why is - darned if I know! After all if we had the answer we'd fix it. Two things that help me are a very dear friend who always listens, and helps me rationalise things and get them into better persepective. Not bad for a bloke! The other thing is to imagine a blackboard with the number 25 on it, and slowly count backwards, picturing each number. Takes your mind off the problem. I also will tell myself at times - STOP IT!

    I have to go for a smear in the next few weeks. How about you go for whatever you need to do and we can support one another. **smile**
    Would be nice if this board had the facility to send a private message and we could talk together more easily.

    But we are doing fine - we will survive - we will again feel like the desirable women we know we are. A dearly departed friend of mine used to say - and this too will pass - right on!!

    love and hugs to you

    Jude

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 07:46 AM   #4
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi Jude,
    I stick around here because I don't have a life! LOL! Plus, I feel I have developed some friendships here. And, if I left, I feel I might be abandoning some of the ladies when they really need reassurance that things can get back to normal for them. Due to the rules on these boards, unfortunately these friendships seem to not be able to go beyond these boards. Since the invention of the Internet and list messages, I have actually became friends with couple of other ladies I met through our common interest (our dogs!). I have gone and met them and we have been friends now to close to 10 years now! I am one who is true and sincere when it comes to friends.

    I am so glad you jumped in and posted. I hate to make others on this board think that they can't participate because some of us have this 'conversation' going. There's no intention of being clicky here! As with your lack of enthusiasm - hey, it's pretty normal. I think if you talk to others in our age range, you will find it fairly common. I am the same way lots of times. I could care less of doing chores and if I don't feel like doing something, I just tell myself it can get done later. If things are a mess and dirty, at least it's my own mess and dirt! LOL! My dishes sit in the sink lots of times!

    Hey, if someone wants to eat, they have legs/arms and can cook for themselves or go out and get takeout - it's the easiest (unless of course it is a young child - then you got to get off your butt and do some feeding). You sigh a lot because you're probably tired. I see myself doing the same thing! You are 51 and have probably moved mountains and swam oceans so you need a break now! LOL! I bet you've accomplished and done a lot in your life and it's just time now for you to start thinking more of yourself. Take time for yourself!! As with sex, IMO there's more to life than sex. Is hubby getting upset over your lack of enthusiasm?

    If your mum went thru meno at 52, that could mean your period will start really changing soon and it seems like it already started. It will get to the point where you can't predict when you will get it. Don't you just hate going for your smear (pap)? I'm sure you're not as much of a chicken as I am! LOL! I do get anxiety when I have to get mine!

    You seem to be holding up pretty good...do you have other symptoms? Are you taking any meds/vits?

    Be well and happy,
    molly

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 08:08 AM   #5
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hey RMC,
    Just thought I tell you that I took some Motrin last night and did find it worked pretty good! It's weird because I remember taking it before and it didn't help my achy joints much. It seems like I have to alternate these OTC pain relievers LOL! I was taking Aleve and lately it seem to not help anymore, then I switched to coated aspirin and lately it didn't seem to help much either. Anyway, I woke up feeling OK - not as stiff as before so maybe the Motrin is the way to go for a while. Even my aches and pain seem to change from day to day.

    It good you mentioned that your therapist said vacuuming is the worst for the illiac crest area. I notice a big difference whenever I vacuum - total stiffness, achy. I feel like I can't bend over! LOL! I hate vacuuming anyway - am thinking of getting rid of my carpets one day anyway! I have 38 stairs to vacuum too! ugh!!

    Hang loose,
    molly

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 09:59 AM   #6
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    i to suffer from the peri anxiety, it always seems worse in the morning when i wake up, i feel shivery and shakey and cold. sometimes it goes away and other times i have it on and off all day, but i am learning to live with it now and i also find shouting at myself helps although my husband thinks when he hears me that i am ready for the loony bin and i say to him got through peri and you will probably be

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 11:02 AM   #7
    rmc12
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi Molly,

    Glad the Motrin worked for you and yes I agree sometimes it seems we have to switch things around and try other things. I need to get some more as I got the smallest bottle a few weeks ago not knowing if it was going to work and since it seems to I need to get some today.

    As for dreaded exams, I am with you with the Pap and I know I will get anxious about mine (due annually in Oct). As for the "other one" (LOL!!) it really is the same situation as last year with insurance somewhat and although I know the person in the other thread who did have colon cancer is correct that it is preventative, I also know that everyone is different and also I am not the only one that is not going at just over 50. There seems to be more people the other way , that have not got it done yet and they are not worked up, not all of them at least. It really isn't an issue at the moment due to the insurance but of course if there were symtpoms regardless of that I'd go immediately. I know her point is we do not want to wait for bad symptoms of course but that is not what I am saying. But I am such a basketcase about everthing that it is just something that I do not want to get so stressed about in addtion to all my other stress. I was getting stressed reading that other thread but the thing is that I did learn that I am not alone in my feelings nor in the fact that I have not got one yet and I am younger than most that posted that they had not got it. My best friend who I have known since kindergarten but does not live in the same city is a nurse and she has not got it and she is not all stressed about it either. She will get it done when she gets it done. She is more worried about getting her cholesterol down and not getting diabetes as that runs in her family. It is always good to talk to her as I feel better for it. I am working on my cholesterol too and trying to exercise more. My ratio is good but it is a higher number overall and want to get it down. But estrogen affects that too I am reading. I think the thing about the colonoscopy is that it is so in the news this past month and I focused too much on it and when we are in peri that is what we do, it is our job it seems!! LOL!! I did it last year too , found the similar thing out about the insurance and then just had to let the thought go. I am hoping to do that but it is hard when one is anxious about every little thing.


    Your ideas about the breathing are very helpful and I do try to do that and it does help. Also talking to myself and talking myself out of my negative thoughts.

    Wow that is great that you have not got your period since June 04!! It is also very helpful to know that one can get thru this, so thanks for continuning to post to all of us peri crazies!!(I should just speak for myself there as I do feel that way some times, which doesn't mean everyone does!! lol!!)

    You said your Mom went thru menopause at 52 as you are. You asked about my mother. I really do not know for sure when she went thru it but do know that it was very different than mine. My mother died when she was 57, which may be part of my obsession now that I am in my 50s about every little thing wrong with me, with the peri anxiety helping me focus on that unfortunately. I was 22 at that time and when she was in her early 50s I was not really aware of any thing she was going thru with "female problems" as they called them then. I heard whisperings about hot flashes and such and she used to talk about her older sister's moods but that was it. I did find out from my Mom's youngest sister, who is like a mother to me, she is 62 now (has never had that test either!! LOL!!) anyway, she said that my mom had the kind of menopause she did...fibroids in her 40s (I do not have any), and a lot of heavy heavy bleeding during her 40s and into 50s. I am the opposite, have always had very little bleeding. My mother never even had cramps really and never understood my having them or my moods in pms, she just didn't experience that in her menstrual cycle so had no concept. I am sure I drove her crazy although we had a good relationship.

    To be very honest I am glad it is the not the same and I do not like to compare myself to my mother as then I will start focusing that she died so young as did her mother (who I do not even remember). But the doctor told me that her cancer (my grandmother's) is not heritidary at all (stomach ) and also my mother died not due to cancer but complications of an operation. She had a small tumor in the lining of her small instestine (also not a heridtary thing) and it was benign. But had to come out as she had problems eating and real pain. However I am sure she died thinking it was cancer. What happened in the operation was that the pancreas became inflammed due to the operation and that is what happened. So it was all due to complications and perhaps today it would be different with the way they did it. She was supposed to be home in 5 days and we were burying her on that day. It needless to say left me with some deep seated scars. and I didn't realize how much so till recently I think.

    I talked to my 62 year old Aunt recently and she said that she too used to obsess over her mom dying in her 50s when she was in her 50s but that it is not of course healthy to do so as we are all different people. I have a 95 year old great aunt who is doing just fine and is an inspiration to us all (nothing bothers that woman and it is great!!) and my mother's older sister died at 85 last year with no big health problems. The point is that you are right everyone is different. As my wise and loving husband always tells me I am not my mother, I do not lead her life and have her issues (she had a very stressful life with my father being an alcoholic and abusive ) and so do not even think about that . he is right I know.

    SO now you know more about my family history than you bargained for!! LOL!! My father's family is very large also and his sisters and brothers are kicking at a ripe old age. Don't know what the history of any of female menopause was on that side of the family and as you know that generation kept things so hush hush about those matters!!

    That you said :

    When I was feeling really bad, I too was very obsessed with how I was feeling. I didn't find this board at that time and I thought I alone w/these symtpoms and had every living disease out there. I kept notes to see if there was any chance of any pattern - but there wasn't. Out of the 5 mos. when I was at my worse, I only had my period 2 out of those 5 mos. I didn't feel better even then. But, things did get better so tell yourself it's just menopause!! Try not to dwell on how you're feeling (easier said than done, but try!)."

    is very helpful. It is so helpful to know that others have got thru this and made it out!! LOL!!. I thought I was getting thru it last year really, but I didn't realize the extent of all this and that things can ebb and flow and get better , worse and better again. So I think I am going to just try to tell myself each time...it is hormonal, and make that a mantra of sorts. I know last year quite a few people were saying that to others, and I did also and I should take my own advice. I know I never felt like this before or like early last year before and there are far too many of us that do feel this way for it to be "coincidence"!! And I did feel better after a few months last year, so I know it can be done!!

    I seem to feel more anxiety when I awake for some reason. I dwell more on everything I am feeling and that is not good. Talked myself thru it this morning and did take an anti anxiety med.

    I did go to the chiropractor and the massage therapy yesterday by the way. He said my pelvis was pretty aligned, my one leg was just a bit shorter but not as bad as usual but my upper and lower back were locked. So that helps me to know that the twinges do stem from that or play a part in it as it is all connected. The massage therapist said that too. Oddly I did not feel any twinges until after the massage (or during) LOL!! but I know that is due to the working out of those joints and muscles and is necessary. It did feel good for the most part though. she said I had great flexibility and my muscles were long which is good she said LOL!! She attributed it to my years in dance growing up and also the pilates. I have been trying to do some exercise every day. yesterday did not after the massage. But will go to the gym today. she said that illiac crest area is highly affected by the hip and lower back as it is all connected. she showed me some side stretches to do for that area.

    Thanks for saying I am "strong and tough and will survive!" sometimes do not think so but in reading this board I see others have that have been really at their lowest and so there is hope.

    Thanks for always being there with support!!

    Hope your day is going well and that you know what a great help you are to me and others. Thank you!!

    rmc

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 11:16 AM   #8
    rmc12
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi Jude,

    I thank you for your post in here and the other one too in the other thread. That issue is just so anxiety ridden for me and I know the person who posted who unfortunately has gone thru colon cancer is correct it is preventative. We will all get it done when we can and are ready too. It is just important to remember one person's experience is not ours too and everyone is different.

    You said that "Oh to wake up one morning full of life" boy you said a mouthful!! I do not know why I do not wake up feeling like that anymore.I am very happily married, adore my husband and my libidio is fine (although I know from reading this board that what you are experiencing is common) but I still wake up very anxious. I center on every little twinge or hiccup!! LOL!!

    Your friend who helps you sounds like my friend who is in another city but we both talk on the phone alot and email. She is going thru this time too (on day 73 right now) and has experienced more fatique and less of the anxiousness. But is very supportive. It helps as does all the friends we have on this board, doesn't it?

    I have an aunt also who is 75 and very like me in temperament (an aunt thru marriage but she is almost like a second mother , like my 62 year old blood aunt is) and she told me "nothing harmful is happening to you, and this will pass" and it is something I keep repeating to myself so I do a lot of the self talk too that you mention.

    Your periods seems to be all over the place too. Mine were very close together last year, would get them at day 23 or day 24, year before had them mostly at day 40 or 50. Then this year and late last year, it has been day 31 and then day 49 and then a few weeks ago it came at day 27. I have considered low dose birth control pills and if I knew it would take care of the anxiety I would buy stock in them and take them immediately. I guess I can give it a try if I want to, the gyn has said it would be fine to do so. But i have chickened out not wanting to introduce other symptoms or long term ones.

    What is your most bothersome symptom do you find in all this? For me it is more the anxiety (as if you didn't know that yet from reading my posts!! LOL!!) and also some gastrointestinal stuff which was worse last year than now, more aches really from hip and back issues and also feeling like I have pms all the time. I was fine for a good 8 or 9 months until this all started up again.

    Thanks for your posts and for joining in on the anxiety discussion and for your words in the other post also. I greatly appreciate it.

    take care and have a good day,

    rmc

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 11:19 AM   #9
    rmc12
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Chilijava,

    Yes, I agree with you , the morning is worse for me too, for some reason!! The shakiness and coldness I felt a couple times when I realy got myself worked up. I tried to breathe very calmly and that helped.

    You said something very wise which I think is a help to me and will be to others : that you are "learning to live with it now" . Guess we need to tell ourselves it is just a process and it will all pass and others have got thru it. But it is hard to do at times.

    And yes shouting at ourselves does help doesn't it???!! LOL!!

    take care,

    rmc

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 11:29 AM   #10
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi Chillijava,
    Sorry to hear you suffer from the gawd awful peri-anxiety! I remember waking up feeling thata way too. Don't think I was cold tho. With me, it was probably made worse by aving to "deal another day of this." I know that day after day and months after months of feeling weird and bad, I didn't look forward to the next day. A lot of it was unanticipated anxiety - not knowing whether I'll be having burning arms, heart palps, etc. along with the constant fatigue and internal shakes and weak jelly legs I was having. I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo glad I'm feeling fine now. Your time will come too, I'm sure!!

    molly

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 12:06 PM   #11
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hey RMC,
    Hope your day is better today!! My goodness...long post....you are a yakker, aren't you? It's absolutely great, cuz I am one too! Can you imagine if we got together in person or talked on the phone? We would have great hen sessions! LOL! I love to talk - sometimes I think I talk too much!

    Before peri-meno, I used to have anxiety/panic attacks. I ended up going to see a psych about it and he said I had anticipatory anxiety. It seems once you have it for one reason or another, you start worrying and scaring yourself thinking you're going to have another - which often brings it on. So, a lot of it is caused by YOU! I used to wake up in the middle of night and freak out b/c I was alone, can't sleep, and then I would pace and pace all night long. I got myself a self-help workbook on anxiety and it did give me a better understanding on why some people get anxiety, and that you're not going to die from it, etc. Something you might want to check into getting. I can dig my copy up and give you the name of the book I used. When going thru peri, I dwelled on every little thing I was feeling too so I know it is really hard to not do - but all I can say is that you have to try b/c that's the only way you'll start feeling better. If you start the pilates again or yoga, it will help a lot!

    I am sorry about yor mom. It is always hard to lose a parent. My dad passed away 5 yrs. ago at age 86 and it affected me deeply. My mom is still hanging strong. Yes, I agree with your husband that you're different and that you don't lead the same life. Does your Aunt remember when your mom went thru meno? BTW, why is she so young? Only 62? It's true tho people back then don't talk about stuff. I don't know what they did back then!

    The same goes with me..I don't know anything about my grandparents - they all died before I was born - and from what - I don't know. My mom is always telling me that our family "have nothing" - no cancer, diabetes, heart disease, etc. Hard for me to believe but have to admit, the family members I do know of are long-lived.

    So, did your chiro and massage therapist give you any hope on that illiac crest area going to normal? Or is it something you will have to live with for the rest of your life? Did they suggest the Motrin to you or is it something you figured out? I feel OK today - so far so good - not too achy or stiff - maybe it's the weather - it's sunny today!

    Heyl gotta go - love to talk more but have to do some work and walk the dog!

    Hugs,
    molly

     
    Old 03-31-2005, 08:43 PM   #12
    rmc12
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi Molly,

    Yes, that was one looonnng post I wrote before LOL!! I have a hard time writing short letters!! LOL!!

    My day was better today overall. it had its down moments (morning mostly and earlier this afternoon) but for the most part I was able to quell the anxiety a bit better.

    When you mentioned "anticipatory anxiety" it fit me to a tee and a light bulb went off in my little peri mind. I do believe I AM anticipating each morning I am going to feel anxious!! In fact after thinking on it, I think I may have been anticipating also that this year in late Feb and March just as in last year, that I was going to feel the same or at least was worrying about it, waiting for the other shoe to drop so to speak after feeling good for a long stretch. I even think the colonoscopy issue coming up in the news in March as it did last year since it is the awareness month for it, triggered it all a bit. I don't think though it takes much to trigger the anxiety when we are vulnerable like this.

    If you do ever run across the name of the book that helped you with your anxiety, pass it along. No hurry.

    You are right that it seems I dwell on every little thing and it seems to be a symptom of all of us at one time or another. I know I went thru it last year but was hoping it would not resurface. I am trying and I did start back in more of a routine of exercise which I hve been trying to do on and off in March more, and it seems to have helped this week more and I know it has helped for me in the past. I can't go to Jazzercize as much as I'd like due to my ankle and back issues (at least yet) but I am going to the gym, and today worked out 30 min on the bike. Not a marathon but a start. Also did pilates and yoga this week and hope to keep that up in more of a pattern as I had been.

    My aunt really doesn't remember when my mom went thru menopause in answer to your question. I don't think they talked too much about it as was usual then. She has told me about hers and she stopped at 51, a cousin of mine stopped at 53 and another at 50 (with NO symptoms at all!! I hate her!! LOL!!) so guess everyone is different. As far as why my aunt is such a young aunt at 62...her mom had her in her 40s and she was considered a "change of life baby"!! All her siblings are much older, my mom would have been 84, and her other sister is 85 and her brothers in their 70s, so quite the span.

    You asked if the chiro and massage therapist gave me any hope about the illiac crest. They just tell me that it takes time and with the degeneration I have in the lower back area it does effect that area. They did say and I have heard this to keep moving and I am as I said trying to get back into things. Pilates should help the "core" which will help that area. They did not suggest the Motrin. My friend who is a nurse did as she has been having shoulder problems and her doctor told her ibupofren was best for that kind of thing and aches in general. Would you believe I went to the store and forgot to get it today?????

    You said you were not achy today and that is good news and hope it continues. You mentioned it was sunny there and maybe that does help as I know that when it is rainier or damper they say these things act up more. (aches in general).


    thanks for the hugs and for listening!!

    hugs to you also and take care,

    rmc

     
    Old 04-01-2005, 10:08 AM   #13
    chillijava
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    hi molly and rmc
    its great to know that life after peri continues in a good way, i am really looking forward to it.
    i said i know i have to live with the symptoms but its not easy, when i am feeling down i try to tell myself that it wont last forever.
    the worse part is as one thing dies down something comes to take its place and you never know what its going to be, like now i have been diagnosed with rosacea which is a pain in the butt as it burns and itches and my face constantly looks like a tomatoe and i have been told it can be caused by anxiety and even hormonal changes.
    i dont think its anxiety related as i have always been slightly on the anxious side and i have never had this before.
    thanks again for your thoughts



    andrea

     
    Old 04-01-2005, 09:48 PM   #14
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hey RMC,
    How are you? I hope you're feeling less anxious! Even tho, your posts can be long, I really enjoy reading them!!! Well, I know my postings aren't really short either! hee-hee!

    The book that I used is called "The Anxiety & Phobia Workbook" by Edmund J. Bourne, phD. I got it several years ago so there's probably a new edition out. It has step-by-step directions on how to relax, exercise, cope w/panic, overcoming negative self-talk, etc. There might be better books out there but I found this one very helpful.

    When I first started feeling better after my horrible ordeal wtih peri, I was so worried that I was going to regress and get back to the same way I was before. I remember counting the months! I noticed the minute I started worrying, I could feel the warmnest in the face, the heart beating a bit faster which tells me that I was about to get anxiety. I stopped myself, took deep breaths and focused my mind on something else. I remember the book telling me to keep myself busy - organizing cabinets/drawers, personal files, bookkeeping, games, etc. anything to get my off mind off of what causing the fear. RMC, I'm sure you have alot of things to do in your life than thinking about how you're feeling every minute of the day or that darn colonoscopy which you know darn well you'll get done. Have you done your taxes? Feed the dogs? LOL! I do hope you notice less anxiety??!?!

    Does your 85-yo aunt have any idea when your mom went thru meno? She is closer to your mom's age and might remember. You'll probably definitely go thru it in your early 50's....maybe 52, which is the common age according to many books.

    I LOL when I read you forgot to buy your Ibuporfren! My memory is pretty good still...considering...but there have been times when I've forgotten to buy what I needed when I was at the store. Lesson learned so I started writing it down - a shopping list! - something I used to never rely on! Then there were times I would forget it the minute I got myself a piece of paper and pen. Of course, deep concentration brings it all back! Signs of old age!

    Do hope you have a good weekend! Stay calm!
    My best,
    molly

     
    Old 04-01-2005, 10:01 PM   #15
    molly123
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    Re: to Molly (and others too!!) re : PERI ANXIETY

    Hi andrea,
    Sorry to hear you have rosacea. I've read that it can be caused by hormonal changes. I know how frustrating it is to have a skin/facial condition. I had this hive on my face for years! I felt so ugly. I was very self-conscious aboutit too. Most people were polite and never said anything but I knew it was there. Once I changed jobs, it went away. I have to be careful b/c I know that when I'm really stressed it can come back, so it's also true that anxiety can cause skin conditions. What kind of med or treatment is the dr. doing to help you with this? Yes, it's true that all these peri symptoms won't last forever!! It's real tolerance test for many of us women, that's for sure!

    molly

     
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