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Mid-life crisis?


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Old 05-01-2005, 10:11 AM   #1
Goldengirl1
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Red face Mid-life crisis?

We have all heard of men having mid-life crisis..but what about women? Is it the hormones?

I know I feel old, fat and ugly and feel like life has passed me by. I am single and have been for many years..I would like to date again but feel like NO ONE will ever find me attractive. I have tried to lose weight hoping that would help my confidence level but after exercising and cutting back, no pounds lost, not even an ounce or an inch.

I find myself not having alot of tolerance for my friends either. I can take them in small doses but that is about it. I'm hoping this is just a hormone thing and it will get better. I hate feeling like this!!!

Anyone else had similiar feelings?

 
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Old 05-01-2005, 11:06 AM   #2
littlejmb
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Re: Mid-life crisis?

I know it was for me! I was paranoid about getting older (I just turned 51) and a few years ago I guess I went into a mid-life crisis. I got my belly button pierced, changed my hair style, got lasik surgery, etc. Fighting getting old with all I've got. My husband laughs at me and tells me that no matter what I do - I'm still going to get old. But, being pro-active helped me anyway! Yes, I defintely think it is a hormone thing. I finally got so irritable and moody, anxious and depressed, my doctor (gyn) put me on Lexapro. Now I feel 100% better.

 
Old 05-01-2005, 12:37 PM   #3
twanger
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Re: Mid-life crisis?

I know the feeling. Especially the weight gain. It seems that no matter how little I eat or how much I exercise there is no difference. It has been this way for the past two years.

In addition, my skin looks older and everything has dropped down. I feel kind of dowdy. I don't like the feeling but as your husband says, we are going to get older and there is nothing that is going to stop it.

It is time to turn into gracious older ladies. I see many of them that have accepted themselves and are having fun.

 
Old 05-01-2005, 01:30 PM   #4
Goldengirl1
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Re: Mid-life crisis?

Thanks for the replies ladies, I'm glad I'm not the only one that has these feelings.

I think my biggest issue is, I am not in a relationship (not even dating) anyone and I feel the older I get the harder it is going to be to find someone. I keep picturing myself being this old lady with only her animals to keep her company. But then I TRY to think how lucky I am with what I do have and know it is better to be alone than with the wrong person.

I just hope these hormones get straightened out soon!

 
Old 05-01-2005, 03:35 PM   #5
kittenlover
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Re: Mid-life crisis?

Age has no bearing on if or when you will meet someone ...but that is hard to believe when you are in the midst of it. My DH was 52 and had been out of the dating pool for 5+ years. He had more or less decided dating was too much work and he'd never meet anyone. I saw him at work and was instantly attracted to him...I went after him!! I am 17 years younger (and no, he is not wealthy...sadly), but to me...he is so handsome and kind....there is more to a relationship than looks. I am sure you have lots of wonderful qualities to offer someone, besides your good looks.
We tend to forget that men are not as neurotic about our weight as we are. Sure they may DREAM of magazine models, but few of them aspire to date them.

I myself try to look at magazines and watch shows (mostly british comedies) that show older actresses who are beautiful and not artificial. I gave up looking through lots of the popular magazines because the ads are depressing. These models get air-brushed, nipped and tucked...how can we hope to look as they do at 50 when THEY don't even look like that!

Do you have hobbies or interests that you would enjoy? If so, see if there are clubs or events you can attend. Who knows, you may meet someone there with a similar interest...if not, at least you are enjoying doing something you like.

Don't sell yourself short....I know how you are feeling (I have PMS days where I feel VERY dowdy and old), but this is the only life we get....don't let what you think you "ought" to look like rain on your parade!!
Best to you!

 
Old 05-05-2005, 04:00 PM   #6
Goldengirl1
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Re: Mid-life crisis?

Thanks again for the responses.

Kittenlover you gave some good advice...but when you get in the dumps like I am it is hard to see anything else. I know in other peoples opinion I am not overweight or even ugly...but that is how I feel about myself. Trust me I am trying so hard not to think that but it just doesn't seem to be working.

It is a little humorous, for the several years I was going to the Doctor to find out why I was tired all the time all they could say was I was depressed and needed to exercise. I knew I wasn't depressed but took an anit-depressant for a little while. Now I am not battling the fatigue as much, but now I know I am depressed. Thought about going back to the Doctor and asking for an anti-depressant. I've been exercising for over 2 months now and I don't feel any better than I did before I started.



But we're women, we'll handle it some way or another.

Last edited by Goldengirl1; 05-05-2005 at 04:06 PM.

 
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