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    Old 05-18-2011, 05:31 AM   #1
    Sharala's Avatar
    Join Date: May 2011
    Location: Down Under
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    Sharala HB User
    Low self esteem and warning signs

    Hi, I'm sorry if this is in wrong board, I tried to find a place to put it but since there's a lot of mental health-issues also I thought I try to seek help here.

    Some of you might have read my other posts and this is related to them. I'm not going to give you a long story about everything and nothing just stating out my concerns and hoping to find some feedback or even people who have dealt with these matters.

    To my surprise I came to learn and realize that my self-esteem is actually very low. I never thought about it that way; I've always been quite shy, I don't befriend people easily tho I know how to put up a facade and pretend f.ex. at work. I've grown up in a violent abusive surroundings but it took me 15 years to learn how to protect myself - aka giving it back to those who beat me. I 've always had friends, not many but always some and what I've understood I'm quite likable person. But when it's about self-esteem I don't have it ...

    And there fore I've come to find out these symptoms which I can't pin point to anything I know exactly
    1) I cry really easily. I've always been emotional but during the past year or more I burst into tears so easily it is's like everything is heightened and I react to it with tears...happy and sad ones...
    2) I don't believe anything positive about me. I can't see myself pretty, I think I'm too skinny, all my physical errors are thing to look at to me, i try to think I'm smart (well I was A student) and good with my work, but I still belittle them. Like it's something not worth to mention...
    3) I have a tendency to end up in a relationships where I'm been cheated/neglected/bullied and I go and ask for more. Is this about not feeling worth any better?
    4) I am really bothered by what other people may think of me. I want to be absolutely sure that all i say comes out right, that no-one thinks ill of me and that if there's anything negative, Id like to hear about it and then I think about it obsessively....
    5) I worry about everything. Each day is about worrying this or that, it feels like I'm always with "half empty cup". I used to be quite fun and happy, carefree when I was a student. Then suddenly I realized I worry about money, bills, health, others issues etc. even when there wasn't much to worry about, even when I'm doing great and all bills are paid and I still have money to put in save, i worry if something happens, then what? I worry about my family, i worry about my there's definitely something bad happening to them....
    6) When I worry or stress...which I do a lot I get headaches..Im not sure if they are related but last time, immediately when the thing that I was stressing over got sorted my headache went away.
    7) I don't have sleeping problems but I'm tired all the time. I push myself to do things, exercise and stay up, but I just want to crawl under a blanket and sleep.
    8) I feel emotionally tired and worn out. It's like living next to waterfalls - in short time you don't hear the rumbling anymore. That's how it is, I know the feelings are there, heavy in my head, but I'm not really 100% feeling's like there's insulation between me and them.
    9) Recently I found out that I have serious anger issues. My relationship has been really difficult and during that I've changed from very passive-aggressive to this insane screaming, yelling and raging person I don't recognize. I am strictly against violence since I grew with it but I even once attacked my husband out of frustration and anger (didn't hit him...but otherwise).

    I'm starting to be scared that there might be some real issues in my head... I don't feel depressed as such but I'm very emotional, I cry a lot. After a difficult day I feel worthless and have had some thoughts about ending the whole thing....but in general I can't say I feel depressed...but then again, if I am how do I know if I feel that being depressed just doesn't suit me. Am I in denial? There are so many symptoms for depression and I don't want to become paranoid with this...frankly I don't want to be depressed. My sister had meds for it and my mom is now been examined if she has depression. Does it run in the family?!

    How to boost ones self-esteem? I have always done well, in school and in work earning high speed promotion after another - I'm over-achiever and perfectionist. Everything says that I should be proud of myself but I'm not - I'm belittling my achievements like "oh, that's nothing, anyone can do it"... am I deliberately putting myself down for some odd reason?

    My mom always says that I'm one of those who put other peoples needs before my own and that's true. Maybe I'm too kind and want everyone to be happy but forget about myself there. Have I caused myself to have these problems, and if so, what can I do to change this. I'm tired of feeling this way, I want to be proud of myself and feel strong about myself. I want to find a way to cope in this world without feeling apologetic or thinking about what others might think about me. How to learn not to worry so much?

    Thank you for reading - I appreciate any insight, feedback and point of views you can give me....

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    Old 07-18-2011, 05:13 AM   #2
    Taylor012's Avatar
    Join Date: Jul 2011
    Location: NSW
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    Taylor012 HB User
    Re: Low self esteem and warning signs

    There are several symptoms to identify yourself if you are one among the low self esteemed people. It is very essential to overcome from this nature as this does not take you to any greater levels of success. You can overcome by encouraging yourself or by taking things positively. You can also go to the counsellor to help you out in this way.

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