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    Old 01-02-2005, 07:32 PM   #1
    canadianmo
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    8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    Hello. We're pretty sure my 8 yr. old dd has ocd. We've been waiting for the end of Xmas holidays so that we can start getting calls returned from various organizations and help lines. I did get one call returned from a local support line. Very nice guy who says that after 5 years, he is now completely cured of ocd. Is there anyone out there who has been cured, or knows of someone else who has been cured? I'm perplexed because the book I have read (Freeing your Child of OCD) has made it very clear that it is extremely rare to actually cure ocd. This book also recommends seeing a psychologist, instead of a psychiatrist, because the psychiatrist will want to put child on meds right away. The psychologist will try behavioural therapy first and then maybe also meds. The man from the support line contradicted this advice, saying that we most definitely should use a psychiatrist -- that the psychiatrist is the only one who can cure ocd. What is everyone's opinion on this? Any and all info is greatly appreciated.

    Maureen

    Last edited by canadianmo; 01-02-2005 at 07:33 PM.

     
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    Old 01-02-2005, 08:09 PM   #2
    Mecpcpj
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    I've also learned that OCD is rarely cured. You can learn techniques to supress urges and contain yourself but you don't really lose your OCD.
    Yes, bring her to a psychologist. Psychologist actually deal with the problem at hand. They will teach her techniques on how to control her obsessions using behavioral therapy. It's great because they really help you change your lifestyle. The psychiatrists usually try to rationalize with you and then prescribe something (like an antidepressive). The thing is, they don't deal with the underlying problem and you don't want your daughter to have to be on meds for her whole life. She's only 8 and I think she's at an age where it's be good to try therapy and see if she can learn something that can change her life. The man on the line probably said the psychiatrist can cure OCD because he sees meds as a cure. Rather, they are an escape from the problem. What happens when she gets off the meds? It'll come right back!

     
    Old 01-02-2005, 09:42 PM   #3
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    I agree with mecpcpj....ocd can't be cured I don't care how much meds they put you on. My therapist and I are getting ready to work on my ocd (I have other problems as well). I think one thing to take into consideration is that OCD (atleast mine) is anxiety ridden. So the key for therapy is to find out what the anxiety is and have her try to face it little by little (I think this is ERP or something like that Exposure Response Prevention)...this is what me and my therapist are getting ready to do. I do feel that she is too young for meds so I'd stick with the psychologist.

     
    Old 01-02-2005, 10:12 PM   #4
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    Hello Maureen,

    I am a victim of OCD as well. Coming up to 3 months now with it on and off. let me tell you, there is no worse feeling in the world than obsessing about something unessecary. It is near impossible to cure it alone. I am looking for help too. What kind of OCD does your daughter have? What products and/or routines?

    Take care
    Smartie

     
    Old 01-03-2005, 07:17 AM   #5
    canadianmo
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    Well, you all seem to agree with the book I've read (regarding psychiatrist/pschologist and meds/no meds). Disappointing! I really wanted to believe in this man on the support line. He is actually off the meds -- he didn't consider himself cured until he went through a very stressful situation and did not have to go back on the meds. He was on the meds for total of 5 years and been 'cured' for 6 years now. Has no one heard of a similar case?

    Re what sort of obsessions my dd has: I don't think she's 'full-blown' yet. She started out by telling me she has a voice in her head -- not a voice that she can describe. When asked to describe the voice, she says it's more of a thought. She refers to the voice as a 'he' and she HATES him! He makes her doubt herself when she's telling a story. For instance, if she says something happened on Monday, she will be forced to say, "At least, I think it was Monday", etc. all thru the story. She winds up feeling really stupid. For washing face, hands and brushing teeth, he tells her she didn't do it properly and makes her start over. He makes her "confess" bad behaviour to me that happened several years ago. For example, she recently tearily told me that she once stood on her rolling desk chair to reach something on a shelf. She knew it was dangerous and she did it anyway. She was quite distraught as she told me this. I tried to tell her it didn't matter. She said she knows it doesn't matter anymore but he's making her tell me these things. The thing that makes her different from what I've read, is that she has no feeling that something bad will happen if she doesn't do what he says. She says she does what he says just because he's so insistent and to do it is the only way to make him be quiet. When I sit with her to do her teeth brushing, etc., I can get her to ignore him. Sometimes she's a little upset at not doing what he says, but sometimes she's not. Another thing she was doing is feeling she had to wash her hands everytime she touched her nose. I noticed her hands getting very chapped. I think we were able to stop that one. I keep telling her that he's not nice, he's a big bully. He doesn't deserve to be listened to and that everytime she does what he says, she's giving him more power. If she never does what he says, he will eventually go away. What do you think of that advice?

    He also tells her to click her teeth together. If watching TV with her, she will repeatedly do this, every few minutes. But other times, I don't notice her doing it at all. Frankly, that symptom has me worried about Tourettes Syndrome. I know it is linked to OCD. What does anyone think of that?

    Anyways, the referral lines are open today and one tomorrow. Maybe we'll go see some pschiatrists and some pschologists to see who we feel most comfortable with. Any other suggestions are most welcome. Thanks very much for listening.

     
    Old 01-03-2005, 08:38 PM   #6
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    canadianmo, it definetly sounds like you daughter has OCD. I hope the male voice she "hears" is just her way of describing the obsession and not an actual voice she hears, because that would be a different problem. I agree with the other posters...I would try therapy first before medication. I'm glad to hear that you are not enabling her obsessions, but instead telling her to ignore them. From my experience and research, medications do a good job at reducing anxiety and depression, but so-so job at stopping the obsessions. The medications are needed for people that are so stressed out that they cannot even attempt to do the exposure and response prevention therapy. Good luck.

     
    Old 01-23-2005, 02:31 PM   #7
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    I had very similar symptoms that your daughter had when I was her age. I am now 21, I am a female. I had to confess to my mother and i also referred to the voice/feeling inside of me as someone I hated. your daughter definately has ocd, and she has many different traits of it. i was never into teh hand washing, thankfully, but i have obsessive thoughts and worries. what you need to do is to get her to a therapist, preferebly a woman. this saved my life. and if she doesn't like the therapist, find another one until she feels totally comfortable. the therapist may suggest medication, in that case you would start seeing the psychiatrist. it's amazing to read about someone who is so similar in obsessions...i wish you luck. my mother did an amazing thing for me: she told me that i COULD NOT confess to her, so it took away the obsession, bc i told myself, "if i can't confess to her, if she won't listen, i might as well forget about it." stopping the obsession before it turns into a compulsion will help it be under control.

     
    Old 01-24-2005, 09:50 AM   #8
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    Much like the previous poster, I am a 22 yr old female, and I have been OCD as long as I can remember, although I was just diagnosed this year.

    When I was younger, I had the same problem about needing to confess. I also had really bad intrusive thoughts and one of my parents slept with me every night so that I could sleep. My parents obviously had no idea that I was OCD, as I imagine it wasn't as widely known 20 yrs ago as it is today.

    One thing my parents told me to do to help me sleep was to count. Bad idea. Thats developed into a behavior mine whenever I am anxious or bored.

    As young as she is, I don't think she should be put on medicine. At her age, with therapy, I don't see why her behaviors can't be curbed. However, therapy might be something she might need again when she gets older and is better able to identify her feelings. I don't think she is hearing voices, I just think the bad guy is her way of interpreting her OCD feelings.

    Kids really are amazing sometimes. Encourage her to think of other things to do or think of when she is has that bad feeling. I remember coming up with an imaginary friend who was a "good" ghost (I was/still am horribly afraid of ghosts, even thought I doubt their existence - go figure) who I recruited to tell all of the "bad" ghosts to leave me alone. That worked sometimes. My mom also came up with the idea that ghosts don't like Glade room spray, so we'd spray my room every night and sometimes I would be fine.

    I wouldn't worry about your daughter. Just try to curb any of these OCD behaviors as best as you can, so that they don't follow her into adulthood. That sounds like a lot of pressure, and you sound like a very caring and loving mother, so DON'T blame yourself if in 10 years if she is still OCD.

    I would also encourage you to do whatever it takes to have her live a normal life. Developing good social skills can't do anything but help.

    Last edited by jules1; 01-24-2005 at 09:54 AM.

     
    Old 01-27-2005, 05:25 PM   #9
    bigbaz
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    [QUOTE=canadianmo]Hello. We're pretty sure my 8 yr. old dd has ocd. We've been waiting for the end of Xmas holidays so that we can start getting calls returned from various organizations and help lines. I did get one call returned from a local support line. Very nice guy who says that after 5 years, he is now completely cured of ocd. Is there anyone out there who has been cured, or knows of someone else who has been cured? I'm perplexed because the book I have read (Freeing your Child of OCD) has made it very clear that it is extremely rare to actually cure ocd. This book also recommends seeing a psychologist, instead of a psychiatrist, because the psychiatrist will want to put child on meds right away. The psychologist will try behavioural therapy first and then maybe also meds. The man from the support line contradicted this advice, saying that we most definitely should use a psychiatrist -- that the psychiatrist is the only one who can cure ocd. What is everyone's opinion on this? Any and all info is greatly appreciated.

    Hi. I saw your post in regards to ocd...I'm a 38 year old male and I have had OCD for as long as I can remember. If there is a cure for it..then help....I am so tired of dealing with thoughts in my head that at night I am so exhausted from having dealt with insane thoughts all day...that I am glad to fall asleep...I have tried several medications and have recently switched to lexapro. It's amazing..however, you need to be made aware that medication is only a stepping stone and that it will not cure your daughter's OCD....I was diagnosed when I was in my early 20's and have taken paxil up until this year. The paxil made me put on tremendous amounts of weight...like over 150 lbs... I can recall going home and my family was so in shock that I ballooned like I did. It's so frustrating to deal with OCD daily...The best thing you can do is to talk to your daughter about her obsessive thoughts...talking about them helps to reduce the power they hold.. When I was first diagnosed, I went to a counselor/therapist and he helped to eliminate the thoughts by making me confront them by talking about them over and over again...In fact....one of my favorite books is called...Over and Over Again...I can't recall the author, but it really helped to put my OCD in perspective..It seems as if one thought enters my head and makes me miserable for days and then another thought comes...It's bizarre, but I now know that they are only thoughts...my biggest fears come from the fact that something terrible is going to happen to me....in which I know I have no control over...such as cancer/etc. I keep telling myself that my OCD is in overdrive again.....I can go on and on..but please get your daughter help...it is a silent illness and can make a person miserable for years on end, until he or she can't stand it any longer....had I only know when I was younger what was going on, then maybe something could have been done sooner to help me learn how to deal with my OCD.....I am doing a lot better by learning about my OCD and talking to others about OCD as well... Don't let time pass....get help ASAP.....OCD is a silent illness.....and luckily there is so much information out there to help people cope and understand that they are not crazy......Remember....medication is only a stepping stone..it will not cure your daughter's OCD, but medication sure helps to control some of the thoughts/etc. I can go on and on about this...but if my son/daughter was diagnosed with OCD, and they wanted to put him/her on medication, then I would be all for it...If our Dr.s prescribe a medication for high blood pressure, etc. then we take it, because we know it's important..the same thing goes for OCD....people with it have a chemical imbalance in which the serotonin in their brains are at low levels...the medication helps to boost your serotonin and allow thoughts to pass freely without any blocks..etc......Best of luck in your new journey....I have overcome it, but it is never going to go away......I wish it would, but everyone has something they deal with!! Anyone who says they are perfect are wrong.....I've yet to meet someone who doesn't have some type of problem...when I do..I will let you know.......Take care!!

     
    Old 01-30-2005, 09:04 PM   #10
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    heyy there!

    From a kid who had ocd all her childhood, I know wat ur talking about. Except no one really realized my symptoms and I basically suffered not really knowing what was wrong with me. I never had that 'voice' in my head but i definitely had the impulses to confess EVERYTHING to my mother. I felt guilt about the most random things unless i 'confessed' them to my mother.

    Well, I eventually went to therapy when i was 12 and i basically refused to go on medicine. I dont know why but i eventually got over my OCD and could live with my life till i relapsed when i was 15. Then, I needed the meds.

    So meds arent necessarily needed in this situation, especially if the child is younger, they can probably get over it with psychological help. However, medicine isnt a solution, for me it just helped me take the edge off so i could deal with my problems. I had a lot of trouble with Paxil though, if you choose meds, that one, i think personally, is way too strong for a child and made me act in very odd ways. Mild drugs like lexapro or celexa are very helpful tho. They do not do anything but take the edge off. They don't change your personality or have side effects, they are just YOU without the horrible, crippling symptoms.

    I know how fearful the search for medication and other treatment can be, not knowing how your child will react or what the RIGHT thing is to do. There are so many differnet opinions out there, and i mean im just a person online typing my own ideas. But in the end it will work out, i promise.

    so about teh whole idea of cure/non-cure. I guess i have had the experience of being 'cured' those years between age 12 and 15. But in essence, being 'cured' is not necessarily being stripped of all ocd symptoms, i just realized and understood how to 'quiet' that voice in my head, quiet the thinking. i could ignore what it told me and it was just background stuff. I know that sounds weird, but it was a blessing. Being able to just ignore or go past the obsessions is an extremely hard thing to do, but i guess that is what the people are talkign about 'being cured'. It doesnt mean you dont worry...you are just in control of yourself again.

    Good luck in your journey and, yes, it is definitely a good idea to find a child psychologist. Try going to the ocd foundation online, they will send you a list of names of the people near you for free and it is very very helpful.

    keep us posted on how you are doing and how we can help you.

    godbless,
    kelly
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    Old 01-31-2005, 03:33 AM   #11
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    Re: 8 yr. old daughter with ocd - need advice

    I wanted to let you know when i was younger i had ocd . My thing was every night before i went to bed i had to check and recheack to make sure the front door was locked , i stood there shaking the knob then staring at it for ever , like it was gonna unlock. I also everytime i left for school i had to tell my mom over and over love you , and when i got on the bus if i didnt see her wave my whole day was misserible and i thought something would happen since we did it everyday. This was all from around age 9 or 10 , i still did it when i got married the first time , then the second marriage i did it for about 2 years so by this time i was 23 or so . My husband at that time would tell me i was crazy standing there and looking at the lock over and over , i had to laugh at times to, I had no clue of what ocd was. Now after 2 years with this husband he made fun of me a few times for doing that and it hurt my feeling like he thought i was a freak so i dont know how but i stop doing it, just like that . I havent did it since and infact for years now i go on to bed with out even checking the locks and most of the time they are unlocked. Well i guess that was one good thing my EX was good for was helping me break that cycle. Now i have picked up a few new things but no where near like when i was younger. Like now i have to have all the dirty dishs in one side of the sink , i hate it when dirty stuff is in one and some eats and see the dirty ones on the one side and stick their plate on the other side , but i think of that as being picky. I have to know where my purse is before i can go to bed , i think how that started was EX used to go through it so i figured if it was in the same room as me when i slept i could hear him , i havent been with him for awhile and i tend to still do that LOL

     
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