Trying to remember past events..
So, I am trying to remember past events. Trying to review - which is really a compulsion....
I started to date my husband the end of Aug. 2001 and we were not offically boyfriend / girlfriend until sept. 11, (we were together watching what had happened and he said he was glad to be here safe with his girlfriend) and I am obsessing over 2 times I went into NYCity - before Sept. 11.
1x was when I went with some friends, 2 had boyfriends and did not want to be there and were bored because they had boyfriends.., others had boyfriends too but did not feel bored, and danced, etc. and some were single at the time, I believe i was single, 99 % sure but still doubt that.....i met a guy,I bumped into him there at the club. I had met this guy at a ***0 (radio station) event around Jan.2001..(meet market event) .I think I bumped into him in the city a few weeks after the meet market event...but I am doubting that..(ocd).
and the other time I was in the city was sep 8. 2001, Saturday before Sept. 11th.. went with friends to a bar/club for my friend's brother's party...and I was already dating my husband - boyfriend at the time - but we were not "boyfriend / girlfriend" status and I remember people dancing with guys and I felt gulity because I was in a bar/club when I was dating someone. I have an obsession that I cheat on my husband (bf at the time).
when I would never ever and haven't ever.
I was driving in my car last night and heard a song, which triggerred my obsession... the song was the song that I danced to with the guy at the Meet Market event, and then I rememberes, that I had bumped into him in the city one time and then I started to think of the 2 times I went to the city above and started to get anxiety and needed to remember the exact date of the two times above.
I started to obsess that maybe the 1x I was in the city was really when I was with my bf (now husband) and then I danced with that guy I had met at ***0 event but I know that I was not with my BF at the time because I would have been bored with my 2 other friends that had boyfriends that were bored too (bc they had boy friends and did not want to be out in club)...but I keep reviewing the events and dates and trying to remember the exact date and sequence that I went to the city for these events. I know this is my OCD...but still annoying... Can anyone relate?
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