| Do I have OCD?
I was about to post this in the angerment section on how to deal with my irritability on silly little things. But then I realized how OCD-like this sounds (Maybe I'm just imagining things or exaggerating). A psychiatrist I once seen suggested I was OCD but I brushed it off and thought nothing of it. I looked up OCD symptoms and there are quite a few that relates to me, and others that don't so I'm doubting myself at the moment.
▪ I hate, hate, hate germs. I wash my ears, hands and face excessively (30-40 times a day), even after I've done so already, or otherwise it will keep bugging me and I'll get annoyed. I also wash my hands and face with tissue paper because I don't like re-using towels.
▪ I also hate it (as childish as this sounds) when people ask me for a lend of a pen in a class. I spend the rest of the class thinking about the amount of germs that was on their hands and now on my pen. I end up throwing the pen away, but it's even worse when they put it back in my pencil case as I have to throw away other pens that were also "contaminated".
▪ I wear gloves and sometimes even a face mask (the one's that surgeons wear) anytime I go out. I hate touching things that other people have touched. When I'm at home I have to spray everything with disinfectant that my mom touches. It really hurts her feelings but I can't help it.
▪ I have sexual and violent thoughts which I can't get rid of. I've had them since I was 10 years old (I'm now 14) and they won't go away. They're great at times but when you can't concentrate on what you're doing or can't even concentrate in school or doing your homework it becomes a huge problem.
▪ I always have to have things in a certain order. For instance, when I'm on my computer, I have to open my browsers and tabs in a certain order. If I missclick or mess up, I have to restart my computer and try again.
▪ My day also has to go in a certain order with daily routines. If it doesn't go to plan, which it usually doesn't, I get really irritated.
▪ I have to have the volume on a certain number (it seems that this is pretty common so I'm not really sure).
▪ I like to have things neat. Today I had to spend 10 minutes fixing my bed because it was uneven. I ended up getting really annoyed at myself for failing so many times and the un-neatness of the bed.
▪ I have to check whether the door is locked every time before I go up the stairs. It will keep bugging me otherwise.
▪ I'm not much of a hoarder, I don't keep useless trash like newspapers or cans. But I hate throwing things away, because I'm convinced I'm going to need it later. I have to carry a bag everywhere I go, and they weigh a ton. I shove things I don't even use in there because once again I think I'm going to use it later.
So yeah, sorry it's long. If anyone bothers to read some of it, do you think I have OCD?
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