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  • Any Advice for Dealing With 15 Year Old?

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    Old 01-08-2002, 12:38 PM   #16
    ~*Silent*~
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    You seriously don't know what you are talking about when you are saying "lay down more rules, punish him more." I am 15 and when you are 15 and in the situation, having more rules and stuff is just gonna make him want to rebel more and he's just going to end up breaking even more rules. Trust me! If he is breaking all the rules already, don't think more will change his attitude. It is something you have to let him change himself.

     
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    Old 01-08-2002, 04:36 PM   #17
    JustinF
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    Exactly.

     
    Old 01-29-2002, 11:47 AM   #18
    chynadoll-cl
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    basically it sound just a normal teenager adjusting to the big world a head, in the future he is gonna do what he wants to do anyway just make sure he doesn't direspect the people in your home or his elders,make sure he doesnt smoke,bring drugs,or do any illegal actions around your house let hiom know if gets in trouble he has to take the consequences and let him know the rest of your rules in your house is a must.

     
    Old 02-08-2002, 12:24 PM   #19
    ginli
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    What if the kid is 13yrs old??? Same rules apply?? Just how do you make a 13yr old listen? I am this boy's aunt and i am heartbroken.

     
    Old 02-20-2002, 08:16 PM   #20
    damara
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    I was 15 when I started getting into trouble at school. I am 21 now. My parents didn't like the friends that I hung out with, didn't like me smoking, definitely didn't like the fact that I skipped school more often than I went. They tried some of the disciplines that all of you are talking about. Made sure I didn't have any money, not even lunch money, threatened to put me into boot camp, and were nonstop telling me what a loser I was. Where my situation is different is that my parents really did "suck". I grew up watching them and they were losers and I acted out because I had zero respect for them and really didn't care what they thought about me. To get to the point though, I think that respect is the most important thing. If your son respects you then he will listen and take in what you say, he'll probably still resent the he== out of it, but atleast he'll listen. If he has no respect for you though and you come down on him too hard.....he might take off. I left for school one morning when I was 15 and I haven't ever gone back....my parents kept pushing and I quit caring. The final threat to me was when they said that they were going to put me in a boot camp for problem teens. Sometimes extreme punishments and rules can drive a kid away and if they aren't willing to live with you then you can't help them. I agree that you should step in and try to help him make the right decisions, just understand that at 15, he is capable of making some decisions on his own. I can't think of anything that anyone could have told me at 15 to make me not smoke cigarettes or pot, I knew what damage could be done, at 15 you just don't care though. I had an uncle that died with lung cancer, it still didn't stop me. It is important that parents teach their children well when they are young, so that when they are 15 and it's hard to get through to them anymore, you can trust that you have taught them how to live and they will make good judgements. As for the debate on how common cigarettes and pot are in highschool, I know that in my school it was very common. It wasn't just one group that did all of the partying.....the preps did it, the stoners(that was my main group) even the jocks smoked pot and drank(even though they didn't smoke cigarettes). The only cliques at my school that didn't do drugs, smoke, or drink, were the nerds and the students in ROTC. Try to be understanding with your son, not critical, remember that whether you like it or not he is in charge of what he does now, and you can only guide him and let him know that you are there for him. I don't think that taking the hard line is the best way for a lot of teens.... when they think that you are angry rather than just disappointed they get angry also. I'm not saying to tell him to do what he wants, just don't make him feel like your "property" and he has to do what you say or else. Good luck to you, I have no clue how parents put up with teenagers.

     
    Old 02-21-2002, 03:24 PM   #21
    Katbabe1987
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    Hey, being 15 I just thought I'd reply. I wouldn't worry too much he is probably just doing what normal teens do..having fun..enjoying his life. Pot is illegal, but I'm sure all teens try it once, as have I. If he is addicted, however, that's another story. I don't really know anything else to the story but it sounds to me like you just have a normal teenager. Teens are gonna come home late, maybe because of peer pressure, or just because they think they won't get caught. But that's normal I mean c'mon I'm sure you made some mistakes when you were his age. Talk to him about how this makes you feel and everything but don't yell at him cause that just makes teens rebel so much more. If you talk to him like you're his friend, like you're a teen yourself almost, he'll probably be much more willing to listen. I know I'm a teenager myself and don't know much about parenting, but sometimes you gotta be in the teenager's shoes to know exactly what you should do. Well anyway, I hope you all make it ok!

     
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