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    Old 12-20-2005, 12:06 AM   #106
    young momma
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    I don't spank bare bottoms but yes I do spank. I have a boy!!! I'm not sure what I did to deserve having a boy! lol!! I threaten more than anything. That usually works. He has had it before and knows it hurts. When you have a kid that punches his sister in the face....what do you do? Hello! You can't just let them get away with murder and know they have no consequences. Some don't need it and some do. You know what, they are my kids!!!! Nobody elses and I am raising them! Nobody else!

    Just had to add my opinion in! lol!

    Besides, it is a butt. Not the face. I was spanked and I turned out fine.

     
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    Old 12-20-2005, 11:58 AM   #107
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    Of course we have things like that here fifi.Anyway, when I have spanked my kids rear ends they know before hand why it is gonna happen.My kids also do not feel they have been treated wrongly they realize when they break the rules they will be punished wether it be a spanking or some other way but there will be conseqeunces.They also know they are very loved and I am here for all their needs.My kids are far from perfect and I never expect them to be near perfect they are to be kids.All we can do is our best and hope that at least some will stick with them so they can make good choices in the future.I have nothing at all against parenting classes I have never taken any,but I have accepted good wisdom from others who have raised their children and I do check out things online.

    I too was spanked as a child it would of worked great IMHO had I not been verbally abused.There are MUCH harsher punishments out there then a few swats on the rearend and some there is no physical contact whatsoever

    so please stop telling parents who spank that they do not love or go the distance for their kids (that is basicaly what is being said here) pure bologna

     
    Old 12-20-2005, 05:20 PM   #108
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    Quote:
    I am from the Uk, I always thought USA was ahead of us
    If by "ahead" you mean refusing to break thousands of years of tradition, you were right before.

    However, if you have reached the "parenting enlightenment" that some people have managed to reach, but not us spankers (who didn't get the enlightment, therefore, we can't discipline our kids any other way) then I guess you are WAY ahead of us, as are the rest of the pseudopsycological/intellectual/political/social people who have some how reached this pinnacle of parenthood that the rest of us are too backwards to get.
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    Old 12-23-2005, 10:41 PM   #109
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    tnmomma - I dont think I have ever said you didnt love your children! I am pretty sure you do otherwise you wouldnt be on here defending yourself. I just feel sad that no one (government strategies) thinks of other punishments as being a high priority to teach new parents. We all do what we think is right for our children, we all get things wrong sometimes too (yes that does include me, no one is perfect).

    siren - if we didnt break thousands of years of traditions we would be still living in caves, blacks would still be slaves, ladies would be second class etc. All i am saying is time moves on, lets move with them. I am pretty sure you have electricity in your house, someone saw the sense to move with those times. I have never said you were backward, I really do blame your government for not having it as a high priority issue to develop new strategies for our future, our government is well into early years at the moment so we are lucky. If someone never tells you something different how will anyone learn, I didnt learn all by myself, people are in place here to help when you need it.

    Please dont think I think you are bad parents, I really dont. But please dont shut your ears and eyes to the future and new ways, some (not all) really do work.

     
    Old 01-30-2006, 03:02 AM   #110
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    Sadly yesterday we had to spank all 3 of our kids due to theft from my wifes purse which was found in the twins bedroom,the twins blamed each other and the youngest,the youngest said it wasnt him and blamed the twins saying it was in there bedroom
    we decided to ground them all for 1 week but told them if the one who took it owned up we would listen to the reason why before deciding on a punishment,thus the other 2 would be ungrounded and for being honest we would just punish the offender and there would be no grounding,but no-one came forward to own up,they just said it wasnt them
    at this point they grounding went up to 2 weeks and they all went to there rooms
    we knew we had to do something so after ringing family and friends was advised that a spanking had to be given to all then double the grounding
    all 3 were advised that a servere slippering was going to be given to all of them unless the thief owned up and once the punishment started it would be finished even if the offender said it was them,again no-one owned up
    my wife took the youngest into the room and after taking his pants down and putting him over her knee she spanked his bare bottom very hard
    i took our 8 yr old son into the kitchen after telling our daughter to stand in the hallway and wait,and spanked his bare bottom over my knee until it was red raw,by the time i had finished with our son my wife was spanking our daughter as our youngest was screaming in his bedroom
    when all 3 had been serverely spanked and in there bedrooms crying loudly we tried to reflect the further punishment of grounding and decided that a 1 month grounding in the house,no treats for 1 week,2 parties they were due to go to in feb cancelled,the monthly trip to the cinema cancelled,all of these subject to the 1 who did it owning up
    at bedtime last night the twins settled down in bed and the youngest after being in bed 1 hr came downstairs and asked if he could tell us why he took it ,he then told us that a new friend had told him if he wanted to keep playing with him he had to give him some money,we complimented him for owning up and told him that we would think about his further punishment if any and let him know later
    this morning at breakfast we told the kids that they were all let off grounding, a 1 week no treat ban was still in force,the youngest was banned from the 1st party but could go to the 2nd the twins could go to both,the monthly cinema trip was still in force but we would monitor it weekly depending on if they were good
    the youngest is to be subjected every other day for a week to a spanking so he never does this again without telling us 1st
    the child who told him to do it,we spoke to his mother this morning who assured us that he would get a servere spanking when he got home from school and my wife is to go to the house to confront him about it incase he denies it
    this evening our youngest will be given his 1st spanking,i hope he learns?

     
    Old 01-30-2006, 05:41 PM   #111
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    Spanking is the only way we can get our sons attention. We have tried corner, grounding, taking away every thing in his room, taking away his favorite things, and when he is good we give great rewords and hope that he will continue to be good. But the thing that that works best for him is a good old fashion spanking, and the second thing is not giving him any attention what so ever he hates that to. But if it wasnít for spankings at 9 my son would have definitely caused some serous problems. Not just that I got some pretty good spankings in my life and I turned out pretty good, and then there are my to brothers who didnít get spanked that often and now at the age of 21 and 22 they have both already been in jail, done drugs, not have a job and have my mom support them. So no thereís is nothing wrong with a good spanking on the bare butt.
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    Old 01-31-2006, 07:02 AM   #112
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    First of all, i just want to point out that the quote "Spare the rod, spoil the child" has been taking verym uch out of context. The rod they are referring to is disipline. Not a stick or a hand. It should be quoted "Spare the disipline, spoil the child". I think we can all agree to that.

    I am expecting my first child, but i decided years ago that i would do my best to find alternate means of disipline for my children. I was never spanked as a child, and dont think it is always neccessary.

    On that note, i also do not consider spanking the same as hitting. Spanking is a form of punishment, and if done correctly, should not truly inflict pain. Hitting, to me, sounds as something done in resource; a result of anger. I dont think most of these mothers would ever hit their child, but spanking is very different.

    I also do not think that we can say that the U.K. is further advanced than the U.S. It seems to me that when they discover something it is immediatly put into place, whereas in America we choose to do more research before accepting something as fact. There are no scientific findings to date that suggest that spanking is harmful to a child. As well, there are no scientific findings to suggest that other forms of disipline are better.

    However, there are findings that say that aggression is always learned. So a 2 year old that hits someone else learned that act from someone else. Of course, it could have learned hitting from tv, parents, friends, or a multitude or other places.

    Every child is different, and responds to different forms of disipline. My mother ran a small child care for a few years when i was young. Time-outs worked for 5 of the 7 children. The other 2 were brothers, and just didnt respond to it.

     
    Old 01-31-2006, 07:32 AM   #113
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    i feel like i need to put my two cents in here. I do not agree with spanking. I feel that it is the same thing as hitting a child. What is the difference if you hit them on the bum or the face or the arm? hitting is hitting and i could never see a situation where hitting a child that can not defend themselves is ok. i am a parent and a step parent and run a daycare and yes i agree not all punishments work the same for all children but there is always something other than hitting that works. spanking is hitting it is just called a different name. If someone hit a child across the face and called it a love tap does that make it ok? children are people inside little bodies. It would not be ok if your boss at work didnt like the job you did so he swated you across the bum. Why is it ok for children? sorry if I come off blunt on this subject but i feel very strongly about this one.

     
    Old 01-31-2006, 10:08 AM   #114
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    The difference between the arm, face or butt would be the amount of nerve endings, if you ask me.

    Our butts are not nearly as sensitive as other parts of our bodies. Then theres the fact that many parents choose to spank over the clothing, which provides a little cushion.

    Children are not people in little bodies. In fact, there are many differences between a child and an adult. This is why children need discipline unlike an adults discipline. Putting an adult in time out would accomplish nothing, as would grounding a 2 year old. In fact, comparing adults and children in this situation seems absurd to me.

     
    Old 01-31-2006, 11:50 AM   #115
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    ok i can agree with you that an adults punishment compared to a childs needs to differ and that a childs mentality is different than an adult. children are not capable of making major decisions for themselfs and therefore need adult guidence. but i think that only makes my point stronger. what kind of example is it to a child to say if you make a mistake i am going to hit you. as i stated before in my opinion hitting is hitting no matter where it is done on the body. and if a child is being "spanked" at home how can you seriously tell that child not to hit someone else. do as i say not as i do? im sorry but hitting a child is wrong.

     
    Old 01-31-2006, 02:15 PM   #116
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    I disagree because I have tried every thing and I do mean every thing from positive consequences to grounding to therapy to cleaning to taking things away and my child doesnít get how server something is until we spank his but. Iím not saying all kids are like this but he is so would it be best for me to teach him he has consequences and that is his consequence for something really bad or to let him continue to do what ever it is. And grow up thinking he can do what ever and end up in jail. It is our responsibility to show them wrong is wrong and wrong is not right. Just my 2 cents!!!!
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    Old 02-01-2006, 04:26 AM   #117
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

    yes it is our job to teach them wrong from right and no i never suggested letting them get away with whatever they want. i have worked with many children in my time and can agree that some punishments do not work for some children but there is always another way other than hitting. let me ask one question. If your kitten was doing something wrong or you were looking after an elderly parent and they did something wrong would it be ok to hit them? i would hope the answer to that would be no. so how can we say its ok to do that to a child? and alot of people claim that there is a difference between "spanking" and hitting. what is the difference? just because it doesnt hurt as much on the bottom as it would on the face makes no difference. In my opinion it is still hitting.

     
    Old 02-01-2006, 07:33 AM   #118
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

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    Old 02-01-2006, 07:48 AM   #119
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

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    Old 02-01-2006, 08:04 AM   #120
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    Re: Have you also spank on the 'bare bum'?.....

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