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Had it up to here...

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Old 04-26-2006, 10:49 PM   #1
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 8
momsmyname HB User
Had it up to here...

That's how I feel about my children (both 4, boy and girl) at this point. It has been a never ending battle with them!!!
The problem is... I feel like they CAN NOT hear me. I know they can hear me. But I constantly repeat myself! Okay, the real problem is they don't LISTEN to me right? So, I walk over to them get down on their level and softly ask them "where do your shoes go when you take them off?" FOR THE LOVE OF...... The shoes belong in the same spot they have their ENTIRE LIFE!!! "Why do you have your cup in the living room?" You have NEVER been allowed food or drink in the living room!!!!
What am I doing wrong??? These are not on again off again rules or anything like that. Even simple task I have to ask 5-6 times, or USUALLY stand there and make sure they do it
I just don't understand, how can I be any fun to them? I never have fun on days like this!
Thanks for your time and letting me rant!

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Old 04-26-2006, 11:46 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Southern California
Posts: 607
pinkie1 HB User
Re: Had it up to here...

Sorry you're having such a hard time. My Ds is 3 and for awhile there I had to repeat 5-6 times also.

Something that I tried and worked for my son was I would clearly tell him to do something, simply stated, and a time frame ("put your shoes by the door, now"). If he hadn't done it and I had to repeat I'd go over to him and swat his hand, then tell him why I swatted and tell him again to do what I asked. If he still didn't do it then I'd swat his behind. It took a few days to a week of doing this (in a loving way), and he eventually got it.
Like I said, it's something that worked for me but may not work for all kids.

Old 05-01-2006, 10:03 AM   #3
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 1,501
KeltoKel HB User
Re: Had it up to here...

Well, what are the consequences if your children do not listen to you? It seems that your children have nothing to fear for not listening. Try punishing them when they don't listen next time - no TV, time out, no computer, etc. They will learn the rules if they know they have to suffer consequences.

Old 05-01-2006, 10:30 AM   #4
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 208
jimmielegs HB User
Re: Had it up to here...

I agree that, if there are no negative consequences, then why should they do what you ask them to do?

Please tell them FIRST what you are planning. Do this NOT when you have noticed a problem (like a cup in the living room). Do this when the cup is in the family room - or where ever it IS allowed. Say: "I notice that you are using a cup in the family room; that's great; thank you! Yesterday, your cup was in the living room, where is NEVER belongs. When I see the cup in the living room, I will put your (say) truck on a shelf for the day (or an hour...) and you will not be able to play with it."

Then, for heaven's sake, DO IT. You can also tell them, "When [not if] you do what I ask you to do, you get to do what you want to do." , i.e. play with your truck.

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