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My 5 year old is afraid of men

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Old 01-18-2011, 09:12 AM   #1
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Unhappy My 5 year old is afraid of men

My 5 year old daughter is afraid of men. I dropped her off at daycare this morning and she noticed that her daycare worker's truck wasn't there. She started panicking, saying I don't want a man, what if it's a man? I told her we'd go look and see. It was a woman, but she still wasn't happy. And this is not the first time she's done this. They had a male gym teacher, didn't go so well and last year her teacher had 2 student teachers and one was a man, didn't go too well either.

She doesn't see her dad very often as he is more interested in doing his own thing and got a job out of town so he doesn't have to be around. And when I left him she was only 3, but he was very mentally and emotionally abusive to my two older girls from a previous marriage and myself and she saw some of it, but I'm wondering if she remembers it and if this is what is causing this.

Her previous daycare worker was a man and she was fine with him, took her some time to get used to him, but she was fine. And she's ok with my older daughter's dad and my boyfriend, but any other man, it's a fit.
I don't leave her to go see my boyfriend, he usually comes over after they are in bed or when they are at their dad's, so no man is taking me away from her.
I think she may have been traumatized by what her dad did to me and my older girls, but am unsure.

Does anyone have any advice or anything that might help? I'm even considering going to see a counselor to see if what her dad did is what might be affecting her or the fact that he's not in her life.

Thanks for the help.

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Old 01-19-2011, 11:29 AM   #2
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Re: My 5 year old is afraid of men

I contacted my doctor's office today to get some more information and I was suggested to bring her for counselling. The nurse told me that this is not a phase, that something happened somewhere for her to be like this.

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sheona (01-20-2011)
Old 01-20-2011, 12:05 AM   #3
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Re: My 5 year old is afraid of men

Oh gosh, I'm sorry you and your daughter are going through this. You must be terrified. Hopefully, with some councelling she'll get through what ever it is that's scaring her; it may be, as you said, she saw the abuse your ex gave you and your older daughters.

My thoughts are with you both, good luck.
No one can predict the outcome of an event with 100% certainty. So, instead of worrying yourself to death... take every step you can to make things work in your favour and just ENJOY LIFE!!!!

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