HealthBoards (
-   Pregnancy (
-   -   Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice? (

wd40dn 11-03-2005 08:03 AM

Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
my fiance is pregnant. probably about 3 months or close to it now. we live in Georgia, i am a US citizen, she is a Canadian citizen. we are having to go through a lot of red tape for marriage, and it is going to take forever. abortion is out of the question, but i am scared to death, because she cannot get insurance until we're married, i don't even have it myself. we've tried getting her on medicaid, but were denied initally because they say we did not keep our interview appointment, which we were NEVER notified about (faxed in application). i've filled out the form for an appeal and sent it in, but i am absolutely terrified as to what is going to happen, but i can't tell her about being scared because i don't want her stressed in her condition. i've tried contacting the state of GA DFCS but no one will return my call. is there any other option for us? i know that Canada has free healthcare (more or less) and she could deliver the baby there, but i'd miss the birth as i cannot afford to miss work much less buy 2 plane tickets, and once she leaves the US she wouldn't be allowed back in until after the red tape for our marriage is completed. this is such a stressful time, and it's weighing on me unbelievably. i need any help, advice, suggestions, anything anyone can do to help. please

Mommie-2-B 11-03-2005 08:18 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
Hi WD,
Do you two want the child? Are you getting married because of the child? If you do not want to be parents yet I feel very strongly for adoption. I believe that it is a vital avenue that should be considered in every unplanned pregnancy.

wd40dn 11-03-2005 08:23 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
we've been engaged for over a year, the pregnancy hit us by surprise, but we both want the baby. i'm very good at making ends meet, and supporting the child after it's born will be a struggle but i'll find a way, it's the large sums of money involved with the doctors and the birth that are my fear. my current job offers no healthcare, so i'm seeking employment elsewhere now, but i need to find a way to get us past the hump of pregnancy and birth

Valerie_s 11-03-2005 08:33 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
Hi Im Canadiana nd am marries to an american and now live in the US, your only thing to do here get married and file for a change of status with immigration this will get her on your benefits ASAP, all you have to do is show your HR department the marriage licence, and she will get put on the insurance, as far as immigration goes this may be a pain in the butt , with extra paperwork but it will all work out trust me

OrangeCouture 11-03-2005 09:17 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
Can you join the military? Your whole family will be covered basically for free except you may have to pay $11 a month for dental for your wife to be. I am not sure how old or young you are but there are great benefits included. I don't know much about insurance because I went into the military at 18 and I married my husband who is now retiring so we are covered after retirement with benefits.

Otherwise, there has to be some other alternative, I agre with Mommie-2-B about most unplanned pregnancies, adoption should be considered, but in your case it seems like you and your finace are serious and that may not ne an option? I hope you can find another job that will be able to support your growing family. Insurance is one of the most important things to have. You can never have enough insurance. Good luck to you.... :)

jriegel 11-03-2005 09:38 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
Hey WD, I'm a US citizen but my husband is Canadian. We live in Tennessee, relatively near you, I supposed. How long has your fiancee been in the states? We had no problem whatsoever getting married. We went to the county clerk's office, gave proof of residency (that we had been living in the city long enough to have a drivers license there and a piece of mail with our addresses on them) and they gave us a license. We still had to have an official marriage ceremony (you can do this infront of a justice of the peace, or a pastor, or at our county clerk's office there were people waiting outside and asked if we wanted them to marry us right then and there! Pretty tacky, I think but, whatever.)

We then were able to apply for a change in his status. We were able to hire an immigration lawyer and lucky for us, there is an immigration office/base where we are in Tennessee. I believe there is one in Atlanta, too, and one in Florida. My husband's family helped cover the costs (around $2,500). We are in the music industry and know several Canadians that have married US citizens and they all told us, if there is any way at all that you can get an Im. Lawyer, get one. There are two other couples we know, one from South Africa and one from Scotland, who are trying to go it on their own, have been in process longer than us, and still haven't heard a thing from the INS. We met with our Im. lawyer one time, he took all our information and filed the paper work and we just waited to hear back from the INS. My husband's been a legal resident and able to work for almost a year now, and because of that we were able to get insurance.

As far as insurance for right now - a lot of companies won't cover you if you come to them because of a pregnancy (I can't believe they can get away with this). Some companies have no bias, though.

Even though we have insurance, we are going to a midwife. A midwife doesn't require you to have insurance, but you do have to pay her a couple thousand dollars. This sounds like a lot right now, but in the end when you don't have to pay for doctors fees or medical supplies or tests or hospital fees, it's actually quite cheaper (check out the midwife thread for some ideas on why having a midwife is different from an OB). This amount covers the time she spends with you, and her being "on call" for whenever you go into labor, the use of her instruments and supplies, and the hours she spends with you throughout the entire labor. If you start saving right now, you can easily have enough by the time the baby gets here. Just an idea: if you put 10% of your paycheck into savings each time you deposit it, you can save up a significant amount of money in a matter of months. And 10% really isn't a lot, it's basically like one dinner out (depending on how much you make). This is a really fast and easy way to save money.

If you find one in your area and meet with her, and have a good connection, if you tell her your situation it's very likely that she will be lenient as to how much you pay and when.

By the way, having a child between the two of you is one of the easiest and best ways to establish a marriage for the INS and to have a better and faster chance at changing her status (my husband does not wish to become a citizen, that is not a requirement, just to let you know). Also, sharing a bank account and credit cards, names on car titles, etc.

Hope this helps! It will work out...Humans are survivors, we figure out ways to make it :)

wd40dn 11-03-2005 10:11 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
well my fiance just called me and said the people from Medicaid called and told her they could not cover her for pre-natal (sp?) care, but they would cover her for any emergency visits to a doctor and also for the birth (filling out a form 526).

she is (i think) 3 months along. i have NO idea how much money it's going to cost me for prenatal care or what i'm supposed to do from this point. any suggestions?

jriegel 11-03-2005 10:20 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
I would seriously consider finding a midwife... a single doctor's visit with tests (blood work, urinalysis and and ultra sound) can cost hundreds of dollars in one shot just for meeting with the doctor and using a room, not to mention paying equipment and room fees if she has to go somewhere besides the doctor's office for an ultrasound... A couple of those and you'd be getting close to what you'd pay for full care from start to finish with a midwife, who is trained for prenatal, labor, and post natal care. I think you'd find that it's much more personal. And if you decide you want to have a hospital birth, not a homebirth, midwives will come with you to the birth, if the hospital will allow it (you should be able to find a hospital that will allow a midwife to do the birth and have doctors on-call in case anything "goes wrong" (they rarely do, unless your fiancee has a high-risk pregnancy, and even then, many women still use a midwife).

If you do a hospital birth with a midwife, you will still have to pay for the use of the room and equipment. Medicaid may cover this (if they have told you they would cover the cost) or they may not. You'd have to check with them.

debating 11-03-2005 10:39 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
I'm a Canadian and I married an American. I'm assuming the "red tape" you're talking about is the the K1 Fiance Visa? You have to fill out a petition stating that you are capable of supporting a fiance, etc etc. Wait for that to be approved, then apply for the visa. We skipped this process and went to Vegas and got married. From there she would be concidered "immediete" family and DOES NOT have to wait in the lottery for a visa number. It's a simple petition (I30) that you send off, and once it comes back she goes to her American consulate and get the visa put in her passport. Too easy lemmon squeazy.

When Canadians vacation in the States they automacially recieve a 6 month visitors visa. If she has been in the states longer then that (without any additional visa's) then she has over stayed her welcome and she HAS to apply for her visa from outside the country.

I'm in Canada at the moment because we're in a similar circumstance. It is MUCH MUCH MUCH easier to get the visa if she is in Canada while you're in the states.

My suggestion? ELOPE. Go get married, then send the petition off, and it will take much less time, and in the mean time, health care back here in Canada is MUCH cheaper.

jriegel 11-03-2005 10:45 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
[QUOTE=North_of_60]health care back here in Canada is MUCH cheaper.[/QUOTE]

So true!!

wd40dn 11-03-2005 10:54 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
if I send her back in Canada she will be stuck there for quite some time, and I will be without her and without my first child :((


debating 11-03-2005 11:32 AM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
I think you're being selfish. Would like for her to have a baby in the United States when she does not have a visa and is not in the country legally? That could essentially put her at risk for being able to GET a visa, which means she and your child could be deported and have to remain outside of the country for two years before being elligable to apply again.

If you get married then it only takes a few months to get the visa. Once married she is AUTOMATICALLY elligible. If you do it as a fiance, she can be turned down or put in a lottery which means she has to wait for a number, which can take up to two years. Once married you bypass this step and it is much quicker, but the only downside is that she has to do it from Canada.

I think you need to stop and think long term. Having a baby while you are illegally in the country is NOT good. If she has over stayed her visa it will only cause hang ups and take you that much longer.

Getting married and sending her back to Canada (or going with her for a few weeks and getting married IN Canada) is a much wiser decision.

We've spent a crap load of money on attorney's for this purpose. If you have the money to invest in an immigration lawyer, then I suggest you do it. Although, what I've just told is pretty much word for word what our attourny told us.

Take it or leave it.

You can go back and forth and visit you know. My husband is coming up this weekend for our 20 week ultrasound. He'll be up for Christmas as well, and heaven forbid I'm still here when we have the baby, he'll be here for that as well. It's not that bad. And trust me, the bigger she gets, the more she may appreciate a big bed all to herself (I know I do...LMAO). And, my hubby is a snorer. I love him dearly, but sometimes I honestly wonder how I'd do it with him in this bed sawing logs all night long.

wd40dn 11-03-2005 12:09 PM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
this post kinda got off the main topic hehe, but it's still info i need.

if anyone knows as far as the fiance petition is concerned, i was reading a little about it, and it says there has to be an 'interview' at a consulant in Canada for her. does it have to be there or will they allow it to happen in the US?

and someone mentioned a midwife section of this forum? i didn't see it, where is it exactly?

debating 11-03-2005 12:19 PM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
She is only elligable to apply for the K1 IN the country if she has not over stayed her visitors visa (wich is 6 months from the date of entry). If she has over stayed that 6 month visa, then YES, she has to be in Canada for the entire process.

You do realize a fiance (k1) visa can take two years, where as a permanent residency visa (once you're married) only takes a few months, right?

Immegration through a family member (which she would be once you're married):

Or immegration through the K1 visa:

**I'm hoping we're still allowed to post .gov sites. If not, I appoligize**

jriegel 11-03-2005 01:02 PM

Re: Have pregnant fiance, no insurance :( ...advice?
WD - there is a midwife thread on the main section of these boards, something like "the difference between a midwife and an ob"... look for it and read through the posts to get an idea.

WD, I'm wondering what is keeping you guys from getting married? If you're already living together and even having a baby together, what is the point of trying to struggle through all the paperwork and laws and red tape of fiancee stuff, instead of just getting married (at least on paper, you can have a ceremony later, this is what my husband and I did)? Getting married doesn't have to be expensive. A couple hundred bucks at the most...And the change of status process after that will be SO much easier, ESPECIALLY since you won't just be married, but actually having a child together (one reason the green card and visa process can take so long for couples that are married is because they have to prove it is a valid marriage, and not just the US citizen trying to help someone out and then getting divorced later. Proving your marriage is real by having a shared bank account and, most convincingly by having a kid together...which you're already doing... will make the process that much faster)

I can tell you that if you fiancee is like most other girls, too, that she's probably a little anxious to have concrete proof (getting married) that you really are committed to your relationship, to her, and to your child.

I guess the only problem you might have is, like North of 60 mentioned, if she is here on an expired visa, than can cause problems. Fortunately for me and my husband, we were able to get married two months before his expired...

I have a friend who is a US citizen and was engaged to a Canadian citizen and his visa expired before they were married and he had to go back to canada until he could get his paperwork straightened out.

All I can say is that if your fiancee's visa is expired, she needs to get back to canada and get it straigtened out. Otherwise, you are going to have much bigger problems to wade through and fix than you do right now.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:27 AM.