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What I never find that one girl?

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Old 12-27-2003, 09:08 PM   #1
Join Date: Jul 2003
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SeeSaw99 HB User
What I never find that one girl?

I really need to know if anyone can identify with these feelings. I'm a 22-year old guy and not in a relationship right now. Does anyone else ever get concerned that they may end up not finding that person that they are looking for to marry. I mean, what if you simply happen to catch some bad breaks in life, and before you know it, you are 30 and still looking. I guess I'm just concerned because a couple of my good friends from college are engaged right now, while I am still looking for that one "special" girl.

I'm just fearful that the right situation will not come along. Has anyone ever had this thought in the back of their minds sometimes as they go about their day? I would really appreciate any advice on this--as tonight I'm feeling quite depressed about it.

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Old 12-27-2003, 09:17 PM   #2
Join Date: Dec 2003
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ShaynaPunim HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

Yes, I know what you are going through, as I am 26, and a lot of my friends are getting married, or have gotten married within the last 2 years. My mom constantly pressures me to date anyone who I bring home (even if they are a friend). I am concerned that I won't find someone, but I refuse to settle. I am extremely picky and want the total package (not to sound conceited but I feel that I am the total package too). I feel as if I have a lot to offer, bottom line, and I won't settle for any Joe Schmoe I meet off the street. But it's hard finding the looks and the personality simultaneously. Often I am attracted to guys physically, but then they bring nothing to the table mentally or emotionally. All of my friends have said that the right one will come along when you least expect it. Maybe they are right, I hope he comes along soon though! haha!!

Old 12-27-2003, 10:20 PM   #3
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1965_Bruce HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

yes, I feel that way and the feeling is growing stronger and stronger. I am older than you - lets put it, late 30s. I dont want to be childless and i dont want to adopt. I'm afraid that my time of meeting a young fertile woman may be nearing an end. I will be the happiest man to meet a "nice jewish girl" but sometimes it's hard to see it happening. Especially where I live.

Old 12-27-2003, 11:00 PM   #4
Join Date: Jul 2003
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SparkleBuggy HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

Us "jewish southern belle's" are out there! Being at the age you are, you shouldn't have a hard time finding "Ms. Right". Be patient, your time will come!

Last edited by SparkleBuggy; 12-27-2003 at 11:01 PM.

Old 12-27-2003, 11:32 PM   #5
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bluesnowflake HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

I think about this quite often, but I can always tell myself it will work out. I believe in fate, and I don't think fate is ever wrong. It's easy for me to believe this at this point in my life. I am also 22, most of my friends are in long term relationships, engaged, or married. I will be too, someday!


Old 12-27-2003, 11:37 PM   #6
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Ninispjc HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

22 is still very young. Believe me, you still have plenty of time, especially if you're a man. Men like Michael Douglas, Jerry Seinfeld and Richard Gere married younger women and had children well into their 40s and 50s. I'm in my late 30s and still haven't found that someone. People tell me I will soon, don't give up hope, etc., but the truth is I probably will never get to marry. It happens. The best thing you can do is to do whatever you have to to "keep your side of the street clean" so to speak, be the best you that you know how to be, and get out there and mingle and meet as many people as you can. They say you create what you fear. If you go out meeting people fearing that they won't like you and you'll end up alone, you might be less confident and you might shine less that you could, and be less attractive. Don't focus on what might never happen. Have faith that you will find that someone, be confident in who you are, and relax a little! At 22, you still have plenty and plenty of time!

Old 12-28-2003, 04:35 AM   #7
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Audrey-B HB UserAudrey-B HB UserAudrey-B HB UserAudrey-B HB UserAudrey-B HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

Another way of looking at it is the fact that not all married people are "happily" married. These boards are proof of that alone. The problem is that single people think that once you are married that you are home and hosed, when in fact life brings along more hurdles to those who are attached b/c there are two people involved together, whereas when you are single, you only have your self to worry about. Everybody wants to meet somebody special who will love them and be their best friend, but you can still be lonely when part of a couple if the relationship is a bad one.

The grass isn't always greener over the other side. Be content with who you are and what you have. To meet somebody you need to have as little limitations as is possibly. Don't judge people on looks/physical appearance alone. Make an effort to get to know people before passing judgement. Look at as many avenues as is possible which will allow you to meet a prospective partner. Even if you don't necessarily meet a partner right away, it's good to make new friendships along the way. Most people who are in successful relationships usually met their partner when they least expected it or through ways they least expected. We've all worried about not finding a significant other at some point, it's human nature to do so. So stop stressing about something which hasn't happened and instead get out there an start meeting people and live your life to the fullest.

Old 12-28-2003, 07:19 AM   #8
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cloverberry HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

I was the same way when I was young. I never thought I would ever meet anyone. I made a big mistake and married the first guy that seemed interested in me and 3 years later we divorce. Don't let this happen to you. Why don't you try a dating service. That's where I met my second husband and we've been married 12 years. You can meet a variety of women. If you can't afford this try going to single events. The church has them all the time and I see a lot of singles dances in the newspaper.

Old 12-28-2003, 12:20 PM   #9
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micheguns HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

i hear you,
i am 21 and all my friends from high school and college are getting married this year or are getting engaged or in serious committed relationships. i, on the other hand have no one. i too, pray for that one person that will love me unconditionally and that takes my breath away, but sometimes i can't help but think that i will always be alone. i want so bad to have a family and kids and a loving husband, but as the days, weeks, months, years go by, i never seem to find him. good luck to you.

Old 12-28-2003, 03:58 PM   #10
Join Date: Jul 2003
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Jennak HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

You are really young. The same thing happened to me when all of my friends were having kids and I was'nt. I just stuck to my own life and concentrated on that. They all ended up saying that they were envious of my lifestyle. The grass is always greener....

Don't worry about what everyone else is doing and move at your own pace.


Old 12-28-2003, 05:03 PM   #11
Join Date: Oct 2003
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JessieD HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

I was so worried about not finding the right guy that I stayed with the wrong guy for YEARS, thinking it might be better than being alone would be. Boy am I glad I finally found the strength to leave and heal and find the right guy! I am 27 and so happy now.

Old 12-28-2003, 08:45 PM   #12
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1965_Bruce HB User
Re: What I never find that one girl?

I had a high school re union this year (didn't go due to financial) but they set up a website where all they posted all the pics from the party & info about the alumni and I was like so embarrassed because I think almost everyone was or had been married and/or had kids. What an ugly feeling.

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