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-   -   My BF is only affectionate when we are around other single guys... (https://www.healthboards.com/boards/relationship-health/143571-my-bf-only-affectionate-when-we-around-other-single-guys.html)

lepeep 01-19-2004 08:54 PM

My BF is only affectionate when we are around other single guys...
 
I just noticed it yesterday when we were hanging out with three of his male friends -- my boyfriend was very, very affectionate toward me.

When we hang out alone he is somewhat affectionate. When we are with his friends who have girlfriends (or my friends) he is more affectionate. But any social occassion where I have been surprised at how sweet, and cuddly he was, it just hit me that only his single male friends have been present.

A little background info on my boyfriend -- we are in love but he has a lot of trouble being consistently affectionate (though he has gotten better over time). Also, rarely says I love you. It is a constant sorespot, and topic of fighting from my end.

So could my observation be true? Could it be a male competition issue?

I loved how affectionate he was yesterday, so ideally I would like for him to be that way always.

Babs66 01-19-2004 11:42 PM

Re: My BF is only affectionate when we are around other single guys...
 
[QUOTE=lepeep]any social occassion where I have been surprised at how sweet, and cuddly he was, it just hit me that only his single male friends have been present.

So could my observation be true? Could it be a male competition issue?

[/QUOTE]
Wow....my guy is the opposite. He's uncomfortable with showing affection in front of his friends and family. It's been a sore spot with me as well.

Maybe he's showing you off in front of his friends...like "hey look what I've got" na na na na na. I'm gonna get some tonight...ha ha.

I'm just guessing here. I could be way off.

Babs

msloquacious 01-19-2004 11:51 PM

Re: My BF is only affectionate when we are around other single guys...
 
I think it's important to rationally (and emotionlessly) discuss this with your BF. Find out *why* he prefers to be affectionate in public, but not in private. It may be a case of showing off, *or* that he isn't the type to show affection, period, but does it in public because he figures he's "expected" to do so? Another possibility is that he is affectionate only when in a situation where there's possible "competition;" by cozying up to you, he may be unconsciously "marking his territory." ;) All just a few ideas off the top of my head....

princess18 01-31-2004 09:16 PM

Re: My BF is only affectionate when we are around other single guys...
 
[QUOTE=lepeep]I just noticed it yesterday when we were hanging out with three of his male friends -- my boyfriend was very, very affectionate toward me.

When we hang out alone he is somewhat affectionate. When we are with his friends who have girlfriends (or my friends) he is more affectionate. But any social occassion where I have been surprised at how sweet, and cuddly he was, it just hit me that only his single male friends have been present.

A little background info on my boyfriend -- we are in love but he has a lot of trouble being consistently affectionate (though he has gotten better over time). Also, rarely says I love you. It is a constant sorespot, and topic of fighting from my end.

So could my observation be true? Could it be a male competition issue?

I loved how affectionate he was yesterday, so ideally I would like for him to be that way always.[/QUOTE]
sounds like hes being affectionate around his single male friends because hes marking his territory and doesnt want anyone to steal you away from him. He could be alittle insecure and yes its fun when there like that. Cant blame you for liking it, but try to confront him about it and make sure he knows your all his and no one elses and that you need more affection cuz you love him so much and il think hell understand.


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