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-   -   Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!! (https://www.healthboards.com/boards/relationship-health/212021-please-help-i-broke-my-wifes-trust.html)

realguy 09-29-2004 03:09 PM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
1)Lay off the computer for awhile if you can. 2)Find another gym. 3)Treat your wife well. 4)No more "talking" to any ex. 5)Admit your role in this situation.
Good luck.

depressesskater 09-29-2004 07:02 PM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
Once again, thanks guys... All I do is apologize and tell her that I love her... hopefully we can work thru this!

eightball61 09-30-2004 06:20 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
[QUOTE=depressesskater]Once again, thanks guys... All I do is apologize and tell her that I love her... hopefully we can work thru this![/QUOTE]



You may want to stop apologizing so much. You next steps are to show her how sorry you are. Go to counseling or offer her to come with you. Communicate you thoughts more than just "i love you" or " i am sorry". She know that allready. She needs to have the security that your words are true.

NothingFazesHer 09-30-2004 08:50 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
No he needs to apologize. If someone turns your 'stable' relationship into such a volatile state then he should be almost begging for forgiveness....because that's what us women expect!! He needs to prove to his wife that he has removed certain tools he used to contact this woman and that he has blocked her calls and emails etc.

He has a lot of making up to do because whatever way you look at it, this IS an affair.

eightball61 09-30-2004 08:55 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
[QUOTE=NothingFazesHer]No he needs to apologize. [/QUOTE]


i understand your point here but apologizing can cause a person to go insane is its done often. The other person does no that they are sorry but its now time to show more than words. Proff of being sorry...

NothingFazesHer 09-30-2004 09:37 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
No more insane than the person who's been on the receiving end of what he has done.

susieq0726 09-30-2004 09:40 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
I think at this point he needs to ask her what he can do for her. She knows he's sorry and they need to go to the next phase: Where do we go from here?

NothingFazesHer 09-30-2004 09:41 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
It's not the fact that she knows he's sorry...she's hurt right now. I'm sure she knows he is, but in her mind, where does SHE go from this?

eightball61 09-30-2004 09:41 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
[QUOTE=NothingFazesHer]No more insane than the person who's been on the receiving end of what he has done.[/QUOTE]

He has done the wrong and no is paying up for it. He can continue but words wont get very far. Actions on what he does will speak for her reactions and she will determine where to take it from there.

NothingFazesHer 09-30-2004 09:44 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
How can you pay for it? Seriously speaking Jeff, sometimes sorry, actions, words, affection is just not good enough......with some women, he simply just blew it and if he has, he's learned a valuable lesson.

eightball61 09-30-2004 09:46 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
[QUOTE=NothingFazesHer]How can you pay for it? Seriously speaking Jeff, sometimes sorry, actions, words, affection is just not good enough......with some women, he simply just blew it and if he has, he's learned a valuable lesson.[/QUOTE]


"yes" he did blow it but saying sorry 100 times will not help anything either. Actions speak louder than words.

susieq0726 09-30-2004 09:51 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
If she can't get over it, she can't get over it - Nuff said. If they are going to stay together, they are going to have to come to an agreement. She can't make him pay for this for the rest of his life. Yes he was wrong, and yes she is hurt, but there has to come a time and place where it gets put in the past. If she can't forgive him, (she will never forget) then they should part ways. Who would want this situation thrown in their face 20 yrs from now?

eightball61 09-30-2004 10:04 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
The other problem here is that it may still get thrown in his face down the road. the relationship may be doomed right now but can be worked out. The problem is that it may be forgiving but not forgotten.

NothingFazesHer 09-30-2004 10:05 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
No one forgets....I've never known a marriage where one partner cheats and the other person DOESN'T bring it up as the first item to counteract any argument.

eightball61 09-30-2004 10:08 AM

Re: Please Help... I broke my wifes trust!!!!
 
[QUOTE=NothingFazesHer]No one forgets....I've never known a marriage where one partner cheats and the other person DOESN'T bring it up as the first item to counteract any argument.[/QUOTE]



True and it does hurt and will hurt but if they both can work it out instead of kill eachother over it then it can work. Its be proven to work and I have scene it first hand with my parents. Some can't handle though and you are right there.


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