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-   -   What's a Friend to Do? (https://www.healthboards.com/boards/relationship-health/251320-whats-friend-do.html)

Ninispjc 02-10-2005 12:46 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Lisa, I do hope to check in now and again but it will never be the same. I think EG and you will find that special someone but I worry about Nini. Donít let her accept life without love; she needs believe that she deserves love. Lisa, I love your unique perspectives and gentle manner. Remember, we canít always be right but we can always offer our perspective. Itís up to the recipient to decide what will work in their situation. Finally, when it hits the fan, DUCK!!! ;)

[/QUOTE]

HLG, just wanted to add my voice to the chorus of "we'll miss you." Hope you won't stay away too long or too much, but "real" life must take the precidence it must. But don't worry about me. I don't know if I do or don't deserve love, or even if love is something one "deserves", earns, learns, works for, or just falls into. But I know my life will turn out the way God wills it to.

Take care, thank you for all your wonderful advice and support, and hope to hear from you again someday!

goody2shuz 02-10-2005 01:00 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Goody, I think our board names were my first clue that we would be friends forever. They both symbolize the simple but honest, under-the-radar advice we choose to dispense. Dorothy, I will miss you like crazy, too. (PssstÖIím the tin man, remember? How quickly they forgetÖ:)) Your time here is most precious - what a wonderful gift. The diamond commercial and the Wizard of Oz will forever remind me of you, too.[/QUOTE]

Heartland...you see, I'm gonna have a difficult time here without you around to keep Goody on her toes. :D You're absolutely right....the "Golly, geez..." had me thinking Lion but it's your heart that had me thinking of you as my tinman. My dynamic duo....I know Jeff is out there....he didn't like being the lion, he wanted to be toto. But our journey together is something I will always remember as well as cherish. :angel:

[QUOTE=heartlandguy]When you said Tom was shocked last week because you laughed so hard at my post, I felt guilty. My wife would be very upset under similar circumstances. Tom must be very, very special. You deserve no less, my dear friend. :angel: -Heartland[/QUOTE]

Your wife is lucky to have you as you are to have her. She just doesn't want to deny the real world of the gifts you share so easily here...she wants to be part of that ideal and wonderful guy that you are, is all. Please if there ever comes a time that she wouldn't find it to be upsetting....thank her for allowing you the season to be there for Goody to help me through my darkest hour....if it weren't for you and others here, who knows, Tom and I may have been living separate lives. I would still be feeling unloved and alone...now there is so much to look forward to in that vision you allowed us to see. Yes, Tom is a very special guy and thanks for allowing me to see that.

Heartland....when you go out into the real world, show them what you are here and many lives shall be blessed. You would be a terrific counselor if you are looking for a career change...and I really mean that. I can see you volunteering in that capacity.....but I have a feeling that your teenage grandchildren are going to need your love and guidance.....the "meanager" years are not too far away....and your daughter is going to need you the most she has ever in her entire life ;)

Yes...your wife is more intelligent than you may think...your needed more in real life than you may give yourself credit for. And, you too, Heartland are a lucky guy :angel: ....Goody

SophiaM 02-10-2005 01:21 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
WHAT?? Heartland is leaving? What did I miss? I skip the board for ONE day, and look what's happening! Allright Heartland, I will give you my blessing for the road for now, but if you stay away for too long, this Wicked Witch of the West might be forced to use her magic wand to draw you back to the Enchanted Booooooards! :D Have fun in the REAL world, Heartlandguy!

heartlandguy 02-10-2005 08:57 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Goody, you are such a blessing to so many people here, especially on the boards involving the healing arts. But are you sure you got the words right for [I]Leaving on a Jet Plane[/I]? :confused: Peter, Paul and Mary's lyrics were certainly different!

goody2shuz 02-11-2005 05:39 AM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
:yawn: [QUOTE=heartlandguy]Goody, you are such a blessing to so many people here, especially on the boards involving the healing arts. But are you sure you got the words right for [I]Leaving on a Jet Plane[/I]? :confused: Peter, Paul and Mary's lyrics were certainly different![/QUOTE]

You see, Heartland, we do have lots in common. That's where it all began for me....I came here originally seeking health advice and comfort prior to some major surgery.....some 10 months ago. I decided since so many were there for me that I would take on the role for others that found themselves in Goody's shoes :D I had a thread that somehow got wiped out......it went on for over 7 months....we picked it right back up and it continues on. Yes...that's where it all began for Goody and it really feels good when complete strangers can pull together and erase the anxiety that we commonly feel when going into surgery. Or here....sharing our experiences in life to make the broken hearts mend.

As far as [I]Leaving on a Jetplane[/I]....music and lyrics have a funny way of reaching people.....even when they're the wrong ones ;)

Well....today is the day for me to check in with my friend....it is her day off and she does have plans to go to the movies with a friend..so I'm hoping to catch her before she leaves. She's in the midwest & sometimes there's a time difference of an hour but I believe we're now on the same time. Hey.....Heartland, I don't even know what state you're in??? I'm guessing somewhere on the East coast, although your username may suggest the midwest. As you know I'm a New Yorker.....born and raised here all my life by the water. Water...the symbol of life and what brought Tom & I together. We love boating & jetskiing although Goody no longer does that I thoroughly enjoy watching the girls.

Heartland....I didn't realize that this thread would end up being the sign that your season here would come to an end. Believe me, we both share in knowing that God has a funny way of presenting them and we have both been blessed with being an instrument of delivering them, but I can't help but feel a little distressed that I had to be that instrument that would have your season here coming to an end. I do not question God's plans for us, and I am sure He has wonderful ones for both of us....but what I guess is most important is that we are wise enough to listen and follow.

So....you can see yourself as I describe my friend's husband. He is a very charismatic guy....he dedicates most of his time to helping others.....he already talks on a Christian program and has worked in the Chamber of Commerce. His goal is to have his own Christian program on Cable TV and his salary funded by sponsors so that he can do what he truly loves to do. I can honestly see him doing this and he will be great at it....he just has to see that in the interim he has to do other things to provide for his family while at the same time pursuing his dream. He needs to balance and not lose sight of the stepping stones in life that will get him there. Yes...my friend and I have often laughed together at his tunnel vision....we have no doubt that he will get there but in the meantime he needs to be there for his wife and son who have supported him in his dreams for so long but as a family are in great debt. The ultimatum my friend will give him may put that firecracker up his butt to get him to see that by working a job he won't be giving up his dream......just making sure he still has a way of getting there. ;)

Well...Goody has lots going on, my daughter has her Junior prom and a date with a new guy we have yet to meet. At a Superbowl party they both discovered in a group of friends that they didn't have dates and he suggested that they go together. So I've been informed that I must order a boutenoir (?sp) and make a hair appointment. Her nails are done, dress is bought, matching shoes......mom thought she'd look for a purse and shawl to accessorize. The affair is tomorrow with lots left to do. See, Heartland.....real life is still here and nothing beats living it. You're doing the right thing....there are times that I find myself here more than I should be but I never forget that it's real life that holds the real hapiness in our lives. (At least that's what I'm reminded of daily when the girls fly in the door ;) ) Here, on the boards, it's the gravy whether it's a season or a stepping stone in our lives to where we are truly meant to be. God is leading you to your vision in life....the one you shared with me not too long ago that you see for you and Mrs. Heartland, and I have a feeling that it is going to turn out to be even more than you first invisioned it to be. ;) It's a wonderful vision and one that I am certain you will reach...don't give up on your dreams, Heartland. if anyone can make them come true it'll be YOU......Goody

heartlandguy 02-11-2005 07:35 AM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Goody, I didnít make it very clear yesterday but I treasure the thought of you making extra time available here during my final days as a regular. I feel like a large part of my heart is dying as I back away from what I love to do here. The best gift we can offer a dying person is our time in their final hours and your gesture is very touching. Just so I donít confuse anyone with my metaphor, Iím in very good health and physically feel great. Exercise has made huge improvements in my quality of life. Physically, I feel like Iím 30 again.

[I]I don't even know what state you're in???[/I]
Iím a proud Nebraskan so I live relatively close to Nini. However, if you expect me to know much about agriculture, you would be wrong; my degree is in science.

[I]I can't help but feel a little distressed that I had to be that instrument that would have your season here coming to an end.[/I]
You feel like I felt when I knew I was losing Dorothy. We have liberated each other from our demons and I will always have very fond memories of you. If I believed in reincarnation, I would swear we knew each other in a previous life.

[I]you can see yourself as I describe my friend's husband.[/I]
For idealists like me, romance comes easily because love is pure and idealistic. Business and politics are not pure and idealistic; theyíre games. While my Libra nature lets me be comfortable with business and politics, I donít actually enjoy them like many people do.
[I]He needs to balance and not lose sight of the stepping stones in life that will get him there. Yes...my friend and I have often laughed together at his tunnel vision.[/I]
My wife can relate to you two here. My wife is a saint. A lesser woman would have left me years ago. I think we understand and tolerate each otherís weaknesses better than most couples. Your friend is obviously very tolerant, too. There must be something sexy about being an idealist. ;)
[I]by working a job he won't be giving up his dream......just making sure he still has a way of getting there.[/I]
Likewise, I now realize that there must be a step between where I am at and my dream. I must clearly define that step and see it as part of my journey to my desired destination.

[I]Ödon't give up on your dreams, Heartland. if anyone can make them come true it'll be YOU.[/I]
I think so, too, thanks to a little help from my friends. [SIZE=1]What would you think if I sang out of tune, would you stand up and walk out on me?[/SIZE]

goody2shuz 02-11-2005 08:18 AM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Goody, I didnít make it very clear yesterday but I treasure the thought of you making extra time available here during my final days as a regular. I feel like a large part of my heart is dying as I back away from what I love to do here. The best gift we can offer a dying person is our time in their final hours and your gesture is very touching. [/QUOTE]

Must be the nurse in me. I was really big on believeing that no one should leave feeling alone. And so, the gesture is the same when it comes to your leaving here :angel:

[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Iím a proud Nebraskan so I live relatively close to Nini. However, if you expect me to know much about agriculture, you would be wrong; my degree is in science.[/QUOTE]

My first real Nebraskan friend....Goody feels honored!!! And who knows...once you hit the real world with Mrs. Heart, you may walk into a friendly beer joint and see the beautiful olive skinned woman singin one of our road trip tunes with a guy in the quddience with the most adoring grin who just can't keep his eyes off of the singer...and you'll just know it's Nini :D


[QUOTE=heartlandguy]You feel like I felt when I knew I was losing Dorothy. We have liberated each other from our demons and I will always have very fond memories of you. If I believed in reincarnation, I would swear we knew each other in a previous life.[/QUOTE]

Ditto..Heartland. Just goes to show how God keeps His promise of letting us know that we are not alone and that He is here in the people He places in our lives to help us through those difficult times ;)


[QUOTE=heartlandguy]For idealists like me, romance comes easily because love is pure and idealistic. Business and politics are not pure and idealistic; theyíre games. While my Libra nature lets me be comfortable with business and politics, I donít actually enjoy them like many people do.[/QUOTE]

Always remember...that this is not in anyway a bad way to think and live....it just has to be balanced with reality and what's practical in our lives. Don't ever lose these values, Heartland...they are truly what makes you the unique person that you are and that I as well as many others here, have grown to love. The people in the real world will be drawn to this part of you as well.


[QUOTE=heartlandguy]My wife can relate to you two here. My wife is a saint. A lesser woman would have left me years ago. I think we understand and tolerate each otherís weaknesses better than most couples. Your friend is obviously very tolerant, too. There must be something sexy about being an idealist. [/QUOTE]

Your wife is a smart woman and knew not to give up on someone who possesses such fine qualities. It is sometimes the part of someone that they see as their weakness, that we love most about that person. I know the things that keep Tom busy in terms of his sense of adventure that can be time consuming are the very things that made me fall in love with him in the first place. ;)


[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Likewise, I now realize that there must be a step between where I am at and my dream. I must clearly define that step and see it as part of my journey to my desired destination.[/QUOTE]

And Goody has faith that you truly will :D

[QUOTE=heartland][I]Ödon't give up on your dreams, Heartland. if anyone can make them come true it'll be YOU.[/I]
I think so, too, thanks to a little help from my friends. [SIZE=1]What would you think if I sang out of tune, would you stand up and walk out on me?[/SIZE][/QUOTE]

You'll get by with a little help from your friends....yeah we'll get by with a little help from our friends :jester: ....Goody

goody2shuz 02-11-2005 02:19 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Just a little update....I called my friend today as I had promised but just missed her as she had just stepped out to a movie. Her husband answered and I took the opportunity to smooth out any wrinkles that may have occurred when he had called me the other day. I really said some things that were normally quite risky for me to say and the conversation ended a little bit strained. So I brought that up, saying that I hoped that he didn't take anything that I had said in our phone conversation badly...that I loved both him and my friend and as their maid of honor felt an obligation to say some of the things I did in order for their marriage to survive the financial hardships they were facing. I also reassured him that I believed in the sanctity of marriage and any advice I would give him or my friend would be to do all that is possible in order to preserve it. He went on again about how in time he will be making money and I told him that his wife was tired of hearing this and that if he didn't come up with a paycheck of some sort with in the next week that she may be asking him to leave (my friend says that she has hinted towards this already with him so it wasn't as if I was saying something he hasn't heard before) I asked him what would be the harm in working 1-2 nights a week to give his wife a definite sense of security knowing that some money on his part would be coming in...just until his plans got off the ground. He said that there wasn't anyplace that would hire somebody for so few hours. I shared with him how my daughter was working a job 1-2 times a week putting in about 10-12 hours and making over $100 a week. He made some more excuses and went on to say he would be meeting with a client and only had an hour to prepare himself and needed to go. I feel as if things were smoothed out and ended up telling him that I would pray that things went well with his meeting as he expected to get his first job in what he's starting to set up in video/Cd productions. I also got the chance to tell him how I truly believed that one day that he would achieve what he wanted to do in his life and would proud of him as his wife would be but in the interim working another job would alleviate the financial problems and only be a stepping stone, something temporarily needed until he got there. He seemed to go through the motions of listening but whether it got through is another matter. So.....I really felt at least I releived myself as a threat to him and perhaps if I was lucky, helped in someway. We'll see....Goody :angel:

heartlandguy 02-13-2005 11:23 AM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Thanks for the update, Goody. You've done all you can for now. I wish I could help...

Your friend is lucky to have a friend of your caliber. :angel:

goody2shuz 02-14-2005 07:44 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Thanks for the update, Goody. You've done all you can for now. I wish I could help...

Your friend is lucky to have a friend of your caliber. :angel:[/QUOTE]


Heartland......just your faith in me helps ;) Which leads me to respond to one of your posts.........


[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Revealing a weakness at the right moment makes a person very approachable and open to a special bond. When the other person can complement that weakness with a strength, it alters oneís life. I have been privileged to experience life altering changes with two women.

The first involved a beautiful blond-haired, blue-eyed coed who was busy dating the field. I met her just after I realized my own self-worth. For three months, things progressed slowly but steadily between the two cynics. Then one school night I received a call from her, crying about a family tragedy. I was amazed she picked me in her hour of need. We talked most the night and I finally felt very close to her. Within days I knew she felt the same way. Things progressed quickly and I am truly blessed to call this wonderful woman my wife of 30+ years. We remain as close as on that sad but special night.

The second parallels the first in a surprising number of ways. It happened on this board and itís led to a life altering friendship. Several of us were helping her on her marriage thread when one day her post included three words Iíll never forget, ďI'm scared HeartlandĒ. Thatís not a call for the normal advice and support dispensed here. Somehow she got through that dark hour. With the help of many wonderful people here, her marriage is back on track. That dark hour was the beginning of an unexpected but very uplifting friendship that Iíll never forget. She shares her values and caring ways here with so many and, mainly by example, has reminded me in a variety of ways of how precious my married life is. What better qualities could a man hope for in a female friend? Thank you so much, Goody, for just being you.[/QUOTE]

Heartland......how can one respond to such a loving description of a life altering experience that I see as vividly as you???? We both hold the same belief that God places people in our lives as a reminder to us that He is always with us.....even in our darkest hours. It seems like ions ago that I posted those words that you so devotedly responded to. I trusted that you would hold my hand while walking through one of the scariest roads of my life.....and you raised me up above my fears and showed me the way home ;) I guess it seems so long ago because I feel as if I have experienced such personal growth over the past few months. And I owe it mostly to you and your patience and determination in seeing me through. You haven't lost Dorothy.....and my tinman will always be around because just as we seein the movie when Dorothy finally makes her way home...the tinman ends up being somebody she has known and trusted all of her life. ;) And it will always be that way with you and I, Heartland. We're backome, Heartland....after coming full circle and living our real lives knowing that we'll always be a part of each other's lives so long as we keep on living them.

I know that as you make your career choices, that you will be good at whatever it is you choose to do. And I know that I will always consider myself blessed to have crossed pathes with you in life. I truly believe that the reflection of your image is etched on my heart that will be recognizable when we finally do meet our Maker.

My thread asks...what's a friend to do??? You answer it with your own words....your friend is lucky to have a friend of your caliber.....who will forever be your friend.........Goody :angel:

heartlandguy 02-15-2005 12:40 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Eureka, Goody! I hadnít truly come full circle until the middle of last night. Until then, I never really understood how our special bond would help me. As it happens so often for those who believe in God, the answer came in a dream. I saw your post last night before you even had a chance to fix the problem with the quote. ;) The post mirrored my thoughts about you. Each time I read it, I became emotional. As Hitch would note, I missed 90% of the feelings you put into it (no body language or tone of voice) but if you had half as much difficulty writing it as I did writing the passage you quoted, then you too must wonder why God would want us to feel such emotion. My dream answered all this.

The answer lies in focusing on the basis of our special bond. It is based on one concept, a concept you mentioned in your post Ė trust. We completely and utterly trust each other. We both know that we deeply respect each otherís marriage and family because we know how precious they are to both of us. There is absolutely no doubt about this. I think many relationships donít share the level of trust we have in each other. Indeed, it is special.

Just as Nini doesnít see her full potential although everyone else can, I never really understood until after the dream that I possess a very important leadership skill. By trying to understand your trust in me, I finally realized that the type of clients I will enjoy serving in a new career will find me easy to trust, just like you did. Last year during your darkest hour, you hardly knew me at all. Have you ever thought about why you were able to trust me so quickly and easily? Goody, I now know that we share two traits that allow many people to give us their trust without us earning it first. First, we care a lot about other people. Second, we know how to love ourselves. When people perceive those two qualities together, they sense no ulterior motives for the care we provide and they take us at face value.

Weíve both told many people here that a good relationship is based on partners that love themselves first. Apparently, that is just the tip of the iceberg. I think love of self allows us to reveal our ďweaknessesĒ judiciously so they actually become endearing strengths. I think there is much more to learn about love of self before we can fully enjoy its benefits.

So, Goody, during my last week as a regular poster, God completely revealed your special gift for me. Thank you so much. :) Iíve waited 56 years before getting the keys to that talent, so Nini, never give up hope!!! :nono:

Oh yes, about my problem with my emotionsÖ Iíve felt guilty about them because I didnít understand them until after the dream. Ruth, our resident sage, recently said there is a fine but definite line between deeply caring for someone and really loving the person. Basically, love is caring deeply [u]with commitment[/u]. It is so comforting for me to finally realize that since both of us are totally committed to only our spouses, there is no reason to feel guilty. Thanks, Ruth! :)

PS: Tssssk, Tssssk, Tssssk, Goody! :nono: Did you have Tom take you to Hitch yesterday just because Heartland took Mrs. Heartland to see it? That is soooo High SchooolishÖ :D

PPS: My last day here will be Thursday. As long as it makes sense, I will try to peek in here weekly and comment if appropriate. Iím simply too weak to do otherwise. :)

Ruth6:11 02-15-2005 12:49 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Well, I know one job you would fill admirably heartlandguy, cause we're looking for someone now.
A pre-planning consultant for funerals.
Ha! You laugh.
But at what time of your life are you more vulnerable and in need of the ability to trust someone you really don't know than when you are planning (and prepaying?) yours or someone you love's funeral??
Ok, so much for the "sage" title you bestowed on me. I had to squash that one flat right off!!
:angel:

heartlandguy 02-15-2005 02:02 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=Ruth6:11]Well, I know one job you would fill admirably heartlandguy, cause we're looking for someone now... A pre-planning consultant for funerals.

Ok, so much for the "sage" title you bestowed on me. I had to squash that one flat right off!!
:angel:[/QUOTE]Actually, that idea interests me more than you imagine. (However, as long as all our kids live very close to us, we wouldn't relocate.;))

Does the pre-planning consultant sell life insurance, too? Years ago, I wrote software for a life insurance company and learned quite a bit about how policies was sold. If the consultant sold life insurance as an option, it could be promoted as being full service since it would address both life and death.

Ruth, I learned a long time ago to never forget anything you say; it eventually comes in handy. As you see, I actually took you seriously. :cool:

Ruth6:11 02-15-2005 04:21 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
An insurance license is involved, but we don't sell life insurance. Although someone's life insurance policy may be assigned to us, the only insurance I'm aware of in pre-planning is that a trust is drawn up for the expenses that may (or may not) include insurance against the increase in price.

And Heart?
If I have missed the place in the threads where a lenten "giving up" of the boards turned into a Farewell I am so sorry...
Sorry that your words won't help others who come along, sorry that the loss of your friendship will be felt by so many who are already grieving a relationship or a person.
(Any guilt attaching yet??)
If you're ever on the Indiana tollroad give a wave around the home of the Fighting Irish and I'll be waving back. :wave:
:angel:

Ok everybody else, wake up now!

heartlandguy 02-15-2005 05:02 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=Ruth6:11]If I have missed the place in the threads where a lenten "giving up" of the boards turned into a Farewell I am so sorry...[/QUOTE]Please see post #17 on this threadÖ [url]http://www.healthboards.com/boards/showpost.php?p=1485979&postcount=17[/url]

[QUOTE]Ösorry that the loss of your friendship will be felt by so many who are already grieving a relationship or a person.
(Any guilt attaching yet??)[/QUOTE]Ruth, you are nothing but nice to everyone. Why are you doing this to me? :D :D :D I guess ďeasy to trustĒ isnít the same as likeable, huh? :D About the GuiltÖ (Are you Catholic like me or maybe Jewish?!? You really know how to play the guilt card!;)) Yes, I feel guilty as He11!!! Thatís why Iím staying till Thursday as Penance. :rolleyes:

[QUOTE]If you're ever on the Indiana tollroad give a wave around the home of the Fighting Irish and I'll be waving back. :wave: :angel:[/QUOTE]Iíll do that, young lady. :) BTWÖ I have a business prospect for you. This thread is about Goodyís friend in Indiana. The friend has a husband that deserves to be strangled soÖ :angel:

Ruth6:11 02-15-2005 05:08 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
Cement shoes in size ....

Done. Those Indiana limestone quarries come in handy, don't they?

(Raised Episcopalien - close enough to Catholic unless you're Catholic!)

I knew you were leaving... just had to turn the screws just a bit so you don't just remember me as some old wrinkled :angel:

heartlandguy 02-15-2005 06:29 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=Ruth6:11]I knew you were leaving... just had to turn the screws just a bit...[/QUOTE]Ooohh! :rolleyes: Never mind..........................

goody2shuz 02-15-2005 07:12 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Last year during your darkest hour, you hardly knew me at all. Have you ever thought about why you were able to trust me so quickly and easily? Goody, I now know that we share two traits that allow many people to give us their trust without us earning it first. First, we care a lot about other people. Second, we know how to love ourselves. When people perceive those two qualities together, they sense no ulterior motives for the care we provide and they take us at face value.[/QUOTE]

Why I was able to trust you probably goes back to your inviting Tom to be a part of the thread. Up to this point I had painted a not so pretty picture of Tom as a husband. And yet you reached out and wished to include him in my thread in order to genuinely help us. That gesture as well as your ability to be nonjudgemental played a big role in my being able to trust you. And when you saw me as Dorothy back in Kansas telling everybody how special a role each plays in her life.(pg 15)...you showed me my strengths that I had forgotten about and gave me back my wings to fly :D :D v And i have been soaring ever since....with you and what you have taught me here as the wing beneath my wings. I am hopng that we can do the same for Nini....for I see how scared she is and know that with a little bit of trust and love on her part she will soar as well. So...Heartland...the beat goes on...you passed the torch and I will too, as they say one good turn eeserves another. Thanks my friend for reminding me of that ;) ......Goody :angel:

heartlandguy 02-15-2005 09:06 PM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=goody2shuz] I am hopng that we can do the same for Nini....for I see how scared she is and know that with a little bit of trust and love on her part she will soar as well. So...Heartland...the beat goes on...you passed the torch.[/QUOTE][B]Hkkkkkkkk! Hkkkkkkkk! The circle is now complete and the student is now the master.[/B]
-Darth Vader (said to Obi-Wan Kenobi in Star Wars)

Goody, one of your posts today on Niniís thread was like a flashback for me to your marriage thread except now you are the tower of strength as you reached out for Niniís hand. You did it with such a passion that everyone was captivated. I also like the way you asked the other posters to keep involved in the process. You had all the bases covered. ;) You are such a force here when you want to be.

Goody, the finality of my last two days is setting in. I will help you in any way I can. The saddest part is how our friendship will become like a long distance relationship. While memories last forever, the closeness always fades and the real joy is in the closeness. Itís like when someone moves away; everyone promises to keep in touch but the reality is different. I guess my first attitude adjustment will be to emulate a good driver and keep my eyes on the road ahead while checking in the back occasionally. (I think Thelma & Louise spent too much time looking back at the end. ;)) Cherish your time here, Goody. And [I]the beat goes on[/I]... That's by Sonny & Cher [SIZE=1]not Peter, Paul & Mary [/SIZE] ;)

goody2shuz 02-16-2005 06:27 AM

Re: What's a Friend to Do?
 
[QUOTE=heartlandguy][B]Hkkkkkkkk! Hkkkkkkkk! The circle is now complete and the student is now the master.[/B]
-Darth Vader (said to Obi-Wan Kenobi in Star Wars)[/QUOTE]Oh my goodness......Heart, it's not that way at all :nono: I liked it much better in the Wizard of Oz being Dorothy and you my tinman and Jeff my scarecrow and Susie my good witch. How did we get to Darth Vader and Star Wars??? Star Wars is something that Tom can relate more to.....all I know is that Darth Vader was an evil guy (which in every sense is a very poor portrayal of yourself if I may say) No, Heartland....I refuse to go on with this....I can lead like you but I am certainly not the type of leader that wishes to kick my teacher out of the classroom!!!!!



[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Goody, one of your posts today on Niniís thread was like a flashback for me to your marriage thread except now you are the tower of strength as you reached out for Niniís hand. You did it with such a passion that everyone was captivated. I also like the way you asked the other posters to keep involved in the process. You had all the bases covered. You are such a force here when you want to be.[/QUOTE]
Heartland....yes, it was a wonderful feeling when "we cracked the vault". And I say [B]we[/B] because it just wasn't me alone and I wish to never take full credit for anything that is done here. NO...for when I read Nini's post on how her Valentine's Day went....I shouted at the top of my lungs, "WE did it :bouncing: " And Tom heard me and said...."let me guess.....it must have everything to do with Nini." My daughter who was waiting to play Yahtzee with me looked up to me and said....."That's ok mom....we can play later if you want because it seems that Nini may need you more :angel: " Now I don't share all the details of what's going on but my family does know a little bit about Nini because I have shared with them how I need them to pray for Nini when we sit down for dinner and we do. And going back to see "Hitch" was all part of my mission and also a Valentine's wish on my part to see the movie with Tom as well. So.....Heart, it is not all about ME, it's all about all of US here, including you.....so don't you dare use Nini or me as an excuse to step out of the spotlight now. I know that you have personal things you must tend to and I am all for that but I will never wish to be held responsible for your leaving this forum. I know you Heart.....even more than I ever thought I could know another person, and as your friend I see that you must pursue your strengths and go into the real world in order to do so. And I know that it is something you must do for Mrs. Heartland too.....she needs you more than we do here and I totally understand that. It's like Tom once was with his TV....I know more than you may think, my dear friend ;). And if
leaving here is what you must do in order to do what is best in your life, as your friend I say go and fly soaring through the skies towards that vision you once shared with me and perhaps there may come a time that you will be back.....but if not, my dearest friend, I will be always thankful to God for placing you here on this board to grab hold of my hand and pull me out of the fiercest storms of my life and like a gentleman making sure I reached home safely. :angel:





[QUOTE=heartlandguy]Goody, the finality of my last two days is setting in. I will help you in any way I can. The saddest part is how our friendship will become like a long distance relationship. While memories last forever, the closeness always fades and the real joy is in the closeness. Itís like when someone moves away; everyone promises to keep in touch but the reality is different. I guess my first attitude adjustment will be to emulate a good driver and keep my eyes on the road ahead while checking in the back occasionally. (I think Thelma & Louise spent too much time looking back at the end.) Cherish your time here, Goody. And [I]the beat goes on[/I]... That's by Sonny & Cher [SIZE=1]not Peter, Paul & Mary [/SIZE] ;)[/QUOTE]
No, Heartland, you underestimate the power of our frienship. It goes far beyond what one would normally perceive. It's like you said yesterday about the trust and what we have learned together on this board. That is a bond that never will be broken. And please don't categorize me or anyone here as the type of friend that doesn't live up to one's promises. It's like I told you Heartland when I described my best friend on this thread.....she is the type of friend that calls when I need her the most as I do her. We don't have to talk often and yet we seem to be able to pick up just where we seemed to leave off last. Heartland....I thought I only had one friend like that but it seems that I have found another. I don't even know what he looks like but he's this midwestern guy(don't know much about geography....don't know much of trigomometry) who has a heart of gold who rescued me and who I know without a shadow of a doubt was put on the path of my life by God when I needed a guiding hand. I thank God for you everyday as does Tom. Not too long ago you invited him to be your friend too. And through the offering of this friendship you bestowed upon us a wonderful gift......a vision of our happiness and the tools we needed in order to rebuild our marriage. Thanks, Heartland :angel: If you must go as your friend I must be willing to let you. You are going to be missed here and as Ruth has already in her infinite wisdom stated....I am saddest for all the posters on this board to come that will miss out on the wonderful opportunity of having you here to strongly pull them out of their storm as I had the gift of expereincing. No, Heartland, nobody does it better, makes me feel sad for the rest...nobody does it half as good as YOU....baby you're the best :jester: [SIZE=1]not another Peter, Paul & Mary song but I have a strange feeling that you already knew that ;) ......Goody :angel:


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