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  • Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

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    Old 05-21-2005, 09:19 PM   #1
    Fata311
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    Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    OK guys just to give you the jist of what happened without alot of details, (complicated & don't wanna think about it), MyGirlfriend had sex with another man last night. Since then we have talked and she's told me that after what happened she knows that she only wants to be with me and she's sorry for what she did. I believe all of this because she's not even the type to cheat. But today we had a couple moments, of being sad about what happened, not mad at each other. But other than that we had an awesome day we got along real well and usually we bicker alot. But I was just wondering if this type of thing is normal? Is this unheard of? I tried to look at the thing as a learning expirence for the both of us, and I believe it brought us closer together. Is it healthy to deal with it like this? Just wondering, this is the first time being cheated on and staying in the relationship. Thanks for all the help guys.

     
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    Old 05-21-2005, 09:29 PM   #2
    Fata311
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    Also I wanted to mention that when I asked her why she said that she didn't know why, and on the way there she kept thinking she should turn around, but she just kept driving. Should this worry me? And it is NOT normal for her to do this kind of thing because she is a very very sweet girl. I just think she was upset because we haven't been getting along too well lately, but last night before I went home we made up and everything seemed ok, but then she went somewhere and had sex with another man so who knows. And this was someone that she has been sexually involved with before me. comments guys i need some outside opinions, we havent talked to our families yet. I need someone to give me opinions. I can give details. thanks alot.

     
    Old 05-21-2005, 09:50 PM   #3
    zoe's
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    Well, the cheating part yeah thats normal for some people...the fact that you seems so happy with little smiley faces on your post...(don't know about that)I must be missing something. Sorry

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 12:38 AM   #4
    confused20
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    dude what is wrong with you? How could you be ok with this? She CHEATED on you!!!!! Am I missing something? Even if she's sorry the fact that she went elsewhere to have sex with someone else should tell you about your sex life. Maybe you aren't satisfying her. Either way I don't know how you could have be out enjoying yourself with her the day after she has sex with another guy. This all seems to weird for me. I dont see how you could be happy at all.....

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 05:50 AM   #5
    Ruth6:11
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    Forgiveness is not a plentiful thing here.. You'll get alot of the "kick her to the curb for one time" - it's up to you on whether the trust is gone forever.

    What I DO want to say is that you mentioned not talking to the families yet.
    DON'T TALK TO THEM AT ALL. IT IS NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS.

    You two work this out. Everyone is human. I can't say whether I'd give my husband a second chance or not. But there IS such a thing as a one time mistake in an otherwise moral person who is VERY SORRY. And in those circumstances it is up the other person to decide whether they will forgive - or not.

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 07:22 AM   #6
    realguy
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    What happens between you and your girlfriend should be a private matter.

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 08:30 AM   #7
    EddieDean
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    Wow, there are a lot of posts on here regarding cheating these days!

    Personally, I think you are on an emotional "high" right now, but will come crashing down when this all settles in. This is going to hang over your relationship for the rest of your lives together.....can you REALLY let go and not keep dropping this in her lap every time you fight about something?

    I think that cheating is a deal-ender, plain and simple. My boyfriend and I have been together 5 and a half years, and I would completely drop him if I found out he had ever cheated. Cheating shows you that she isn't at all the person you thought she is. She obviously has things going on in her life and in her head that you can't possibly understand. Let her go and find someone who is comfortable with who they are and who will give you the love and respect that you deserve.

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 10:15 AM   #8
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    It's just the way you described it and how it happened and how you are handling it that is a little unusual. However, the way you are handling it is neither right or wrong. Everyone deals with this type of situation differently.

    Her answer seems pretty much the standard comment: "I don't know why I did it." After doing it, she now says, she knows, "she loves only you".

    Ruth! .... you left out the STD lecture!

    HOOP!

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 10:41 AM   #9
    Ruth6:11
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    Hey HOOP! I'm FIFTY... I give THEM a break, you give ME a break!!!
    Big moochies,
    Ruth

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 12:24 PM   #10
    confused20
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    I still say there's no positive way of looking at this. She cheated, that should be the end. People make mistakes but that's too much. Also if you're taking it so good, she'll do it again if she gets the urge cuz she knows you won't leave her. Just think about it......

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 01:18 PM   #11
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    I personally don't know anyone that would take this as lightly as you seem to be. How do you feel about the fact that she violated your trust in the worst possible way?

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 02:39 PM   #12
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    yeah your g/f cheated on you dude? I dont care if she knows what she did was wrong, but arent you acting of feeling the least bit ****** off? How long have you been with this girl? No offense but I think if someone REALLY loves you the idea of cheating doesnt cross ones mind. And just because she was "thinking" about turning around doesnt excuse what she did.

    Sorry but it shouldnt take sleeping with another guy to make up your mind about who you want to be with...

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 04:03 PM   #13
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    Its too soon to say your relationship is "better than ever". Over the next few weeks you will probably find that your feeling change as you have time to digest all of this. I have the feeling that the situation is actually kind of fun for you guys-- a little bit of drama to keep things from going stale. Im sure you already know that is a band-aid solution for any problems you may have.

    I would suggest you do not share this with your families. This is a private matter and family members tend to take sides, and this will create some pretty big problems in the future. Read some of the in-law posts on this board and you will see what I mean. Im hoping you guys are really young. Im also hoping that your girlfriend doesnt usually solve problems this way. Im not just referring to cheating either. Im also hoping you had a chat about std's (haha hoop, Im the other std-crusader ). I dont condone cheating but it is up to you as to what you want to do now.

     
    Old 05-22-2005, 09:35 PM   #14
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    I agree with Ruth. Do not tell your families. I think your reaction is actually alot more normal than some may think because you are in survival mode right now. A crisis hit and you are doing what it takes to deal with it, but as soon as you have dealt with it, emotion will take over, and it will hurt really, really bad. But just remember, if she truly loves you, she will do whatever it takes to prove to you she will never betray you again, and if you choose to forgive her, then good on you. Good luck

     
    Old 05-24-2005, 04:37 AM   #15
    MOONCHILD63
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    Re: Girlfriend cheated, Relationship better than ever

    She cheated on you last night and today your a happy camper????? I guess I'm old fashion but maybe you like punishment dude.

     
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