It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Relationship Health Message Board

  • Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

  • Post New Thread   Closed Thread
    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Old 06-05-2005, 02:47 PM   #1
    Guy133
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    Guy133's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2004
    Posts: 112
    Guy133 HB User
    Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    I've been with my girlfriend for about a year and a half. We are 33 years old. We've had troubles with the relationship, just can't always seem to see eye to eye on how we spend time together.

    Anyway, last night was the second time that we seriously were talking about breaking up. We argued for a couple hours. Eventually, she grabbed a hard plastic mug and started whacking herself in the head with it. It even made some lumps on her head. It scares me. I can't just walk out while she's doing that, but I don't think I can stay with somebody who gets so irrational about things. A similar thing happened a couple months ago when we were arguing on the phone, and she took her phone and hit herself in the forehead to the point that she broke the skin, and even destroyed her cell phone.

    What should I do? I am afraid that if I actually break up with her she may go hysterical and do something as bad or worse than she's already done.

     
    Sponsors Lightbulb
       
    Old 06-05-2005, 02:52 PM   #2
    staceymp
    Inactive
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Apr 2005
    Posts: 102
    staceymp HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    this is a tough situation. she needs help, does she realize that? i cant imagine to feel like you need out of the relationship but feeling like you have to stay for her to stay sane. thats just weird, ive only ever heard of teens doing this type of thing. is there a wway you can talk about this where you can just say you need a break and she needs to calm down? whatever you decide its not your fault if she is hurting herself. you shouldnt have to deal w/ that stress. good luck keep us posted! stacey

     
    Old 06-05-2005, 03:00 PM   #3
    Datura
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    Datura's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Jan 2005
    Posts: 119
    Datura HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Call the cops or a mental institution. Break up, and have them put her on suicide watch. Seriously.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 01:13 AM   #4
    nothisprincess
    Inactive
    (female)
     
    Join Date: Feb 2005
    Posts: 218
    nothisprincess HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    .....................

    Last edited by nothisprincess; 06-14-2005 at 10:27 PM.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:05 AM   #5
    Guy133
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    Guy133's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2004
    Posts: 112
    Guy133 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    We argued again last night, and she started pounding on the wall and then ran out of my house claiming she would drive off a cliff. She ended up not going anywhere, and we talked for awhile and made things OK for now. When things are good, I love her. But we have a bunch of space issues that make the relationship difficult for me.

    Thanks for the tips. I'm still not sure how I'm going to handle this.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:29 AM   #6
    kellis
    Senior Member
    (female)
     
    kellis's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2005
    Location: North Carolina
    Posts: 109
    kellis HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Your girlfriend needs help NOW!! Something is real wrong with her, and if someone don't do something, I hate to think of what may happen! It's beyond the point of simply hurting herself when you don't give her what she wants. She is keeping you bound to the relationship by threatening to hurt herself......that's just NUTS!! She could also end up hurting you or worse! Talk with her mother or someone in her family if you can and get her some help before it's too late!!!! Good luck
    __________________
    Kellis

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:33 AM   #7
    Guy133
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    Guy133's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2004
    Posts: 112
    Guy133 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    For what it's worth, I can't recall her ever doing anything remotely like this, except for times when we have discussed a possible break up.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:37 AM   #8
    ladyscorp24
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    ladyscorp24's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2005
    Posts: 12
    ladyscorp24 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    she's not really nuts, she's just found a way to manipulate you


    you won't leave her if you're afraid she will hurt herself......get it?

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:46 AM   #9
    Guy133
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    Guy133's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2004
    Posts: 112
    Guy133 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    She's ACTUALLY tried to hurt herself. I agree it's manipulating, though.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:54 AM   #10
    ladyscorp24
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    ladyscorp24's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2005
    Posts: 12
    ladyscorp24 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Guy - This may sound cold, but it's HER decision, if she wants to hurt herself. It just burns me up when other people pull stuff like this! I had a boyfriend threaten suicide when I was 18, if I broke up with him. Boy was I messed up from that. Oh and by the way.....he didn't do it. I since have learned that people are responsible for their own actions, and I no longer will allow them to drag me in, control and manipulate me.......because that's what it boils down to. You know that right? She's trying to control and manipulate you......doesn't that really make you MAD?

    The last time I had a boyfriend that threatened suicide, my mom told me to buy him a train ticket (it's since become a joke in my circle of friends).

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:55 AM   #11
    Guy133
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    Guy133's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2004
    Posts: 112
    Guy133 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Maybe I should threaten to hurt MYSELF if we DON'T break up.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:57 AM   #12
    ladyscorp24
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    ladyscorp24's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2005
    Posts: 12
    ladyscorp24 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    LOL - Guy that was a good one......

    like they say, fight fire with fire!

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 09:58 AM   #13
    susieq0726
    Senior Veteran
    (female)
     
    susieq0726's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2004
    Location: Oregon
    Posts: 2,441
    susieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Guy133
    She's ACTUALLY tried to hurt herself. I agree it's manipulating, though.

    Not only is it manipulating it is also very childish.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 10:00 AM   #14
    Guy133
    Senior Member
    (male)
     
    Guy133's Avatar
     
    Join Date: Mar 2004
    Posts: 112
    Guy133 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by ladyscorp24
    She's trying to control and manipulate you......doesn't that really make you MAD?
    Yes. Much of the reason we are having trouble right now is because she is basically demanding that we move in together. I'm still not quite ready to do that because she tries to control how much time I spend with her. Maybe after 18 months we should be living together - I'm not sure. Maybe I have too many outside hobbies - I'm not sure. But I do know that I'm not completely happy in this relationship, and moving in together doesn't seem like it will solve the problem.

     
    Old 06-06-2005, 10:02 AM   #15
    ladyscorp24
    Junior Member
    (female)
     
    ladyscorp24's Avatar
     
    Join Date: May 2005
    Posts: 12
    ladyscorp24 HB User
    Re: Girlfriend hurts herself when I try to break up

    Oh God no, don't move in. She will get worse, more controlling.....trust me on this. There is no timetable on when you "should", do anything.....you need to trust your gut instinct. It's telling you NO!!!
    Listen to it!

     
    Closed Thread

    Related Topics
    Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
    girlfriend holds grudge and will never let it go. lucky_yang Relationship Health 9 06-18-2009 10:44 PM
    Girlfriend has barely said a word to me all week. Giant_Squid Relationship Health 3 10-13-2008 12:45 PM
    Having an anorexic girlfriend - my story KH87 Eating Disorder Recovery 2 12-27-2007 01:04 PM
    Help I'm so hurt! Dutches Bipolar Disorder 194 06-09-2007 06:10 PM
    Need help getting my girlfriend to workout-serious LB23 Exercise & Fitness 55 01-26-2007 11:54 AM
    Girlfriend diagnosed as Bi Polar and now wants to break up dsteenbock Relationship Health 8 06-28-2006 08:07 AM
    Im playing the waiting game with my girlfriend ... what do you think? ADAM84 Relationship Health 11 06-25-2005 06:31 PM
    Need Help In Regards To My Relationship With My Pregnant Girlfriend BrutusBranyon Relationship Health 28 09-23-2004 05:57 AM
    My girlfriend - cheated on me 2 times.. and other stuff.. =( Advice PLEASE! Nagnag Relationship Health 7 10-16-2003 01:52 PM




    Thread Tools Search this Thread
    Search this Thread:

    Advanced Search

    Posting Rules
    You may not post new threads
    You may not post replies
    You may not post attachments
    You may not edit your posts

    BB code is On
    Smilies are On
    [IMG] code is Off
    HTML code is Off
    Trackbacks are Off
    Pingbacks are Off
    Refbacks are Off




    Sign Up Today!

    Ask our community of thousands of members your health questions, and learn from others experiences. Join the conversation!

    I want my free account

    All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:11 AM.





    © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved.
    Do not copy or redistribute in any form!