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  • That perfect girl... what am i supposed to do now?! crazy situation...

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    Old 07-04-2005, 11:19 AM   #1
    dstalker3
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    That perfect girl... what am i supposed to do now?! crazy situation...

    Ok, first, im 1*.
    Now this is how my story goes.
    I've had an eye for that girl in my class this year, I felt like she was special. And she was, the more I knew about her, the more she matched my desires. So a few months ago, me and my friend had a conversation on ***, and she popped into the subject etc. And then the convo went really deep, and I couldn't believe what I heard, he stole the words from my mouth, he told me he liked her, which is exactly what I was going to do... so I told him I liked her alot too... So he's the pessimist type so he's like "woah... well I'm sorry, I can't I just can't i dont know what's waiting for you, but me, I just have to forget about her ASAP because I just can't " ... Then the convo ended... My goal was to get her phone or maybe her *** before she changed school. After 3 months of fighting myself to try and talk to her ( I have probs with talking to girls and stuff, you can read my other little threads if you Search for them =/ ) And so at the end of the year we both get her ***... And I did talk to her alot in the last week, trying to show interest, but bleh, didn't really work.

    Anyway, yesterday, my friend broke down and told her everything, he told her he liked her, and he told her I liked her... So now she started telling him he had a chance, he shoulda asked sooner, then she started blaming herself a little because she didnt give a chance to the shy people in the class.. Anyway now the secret's out, I don't know what to do. I want to wait for her to initiate a conversation on *** but she's been silent all day yesterday and today... I don't know what to do. My friend started saying we missed the train to happiness and now we're taking the bus to despair etc. it's like he gave up, he tells me stuff also like " i wanna go back " "rewind button " etc...

    What do I do?? I'm so confused, how am I supposed to feel.. I don't know how to deal with all this... I'm lost..

    Last edited by moderator2; 07-04-2005 at 11:33 AM. Reason: please follow your topic on this board - do not post multiple boards

     
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    Old 07-04-2005, 11:34 AM   #2
    dstalker3
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    Re: That perfect girl... what am i supposed to do now?! crazy situation...

    *** means M S N ..

     
    Old 07-04-2005, 12:32 PM   #3
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    Re: That perfect girl... what am i supposed to do now?! crazy situation...

    I'm a little confused...how do you know about this conversation? Did your friend tell her about what he confessed to her and how she responded? Did she say anything about you liking her as well? If she told him that she was interested and that he might have a chance with her, why is he still so pessimistic? Is she changing schools because she is moving away somewhere soon? If she is going to be leaving soon, I think you and your friend are both going to have to try and get over her. You guys are still so young and there are so many other wonderful single young ladies out there who you'll be able to see and date in person. I wouldn't waste any time trying to start up anything long distance if she's not going to be around your area for very much longer. I think we could give you better advice in general if you elaborated a bit more about this situation and just how you know what transpired between her and your friend during this conversation during which he confessed both of your feelings for her. If your only information is coming through your friend, you might want to initiate a conversation so you can get the story firsthand from her. I can certainly understand why you are feeling shy and would prefer she make contact with you instead, but I think you'd be best off knowing the truth from her, even if it's not what you want to hear, rather than being left unsure what's going on and only privy to your friend's version of what's going on. If you do decide to talk to her, I would keep it as simple and light as possible...maybe just ask her, "hey, my friend mentioned that he discussed me with you...I was just wondering if you'd fill me in on what he said and how you feel about it." Try to keep the focus on her rather than your friend as much as possible, and not to make her feel uncomfortable about being put on the spot and in between two friends. I hate to say this, but if your friend is telling the truth about their conversation, then things don't look too good for you and her. If he admitted that you both like her and she told him he has a chance and should have approached her sooner, that indicates that she's primarily interested in him or that both of you have missed your chance with her. I wish you the best of luck and hope things work out well in the end, one way or another...hopefully this won't affect your friendship with the other guy, no matter how it turns out. And regardless, you have learned a good lesson that it's best to be honest and upfront about your feelings when you like a girl. You really have nothing to lose by not gathering up your courage and asking someone you like out on a date--you never know, she might really like you back and just be shy, waiting and hoping for you to make the first move. Even if she's not interested, she'll still be flattered by your interest, and as long as you're polite and not too pushy, she'll almost certainly be nice and gracious to you no matter how she feels. If she's into you, great, and if not, at least you know and can move on--plus, you won't be any worse off than you were when you were hanging back and not dating her before you asked her out. Hopefully that makes sense and helps a little. I think that in general, you'll be happier if you work on being more assertive when it comes to approaching girls and expressing your interest rather than admiring them from afar and giving some other guy a chance to snap her up. As far as this situation goes, good luck finding out what's really going on from her, and I hope it turns out well. And don't be shy about approaching girls--chances are they're just as shy, and you'd be surprised at who might be happy to date you if only you ask!

     
    Old 07-04-2005, 01:13 PM   #4
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    Re: That perfect girl... what am i supposed to do now?! crazy situation...

    That's very sound advice, thank you...
    I will try to get her point of view firsthand...
    Also...I know it might be the good thing, but i always feel bad when I hear the phrase "move on" because right now I don't feel like I'm completely done, and I'd still want to stay friends at least.. She's moving away, but stay in the same city, by the way... I've had crushes and loves in the past and I've always passed because they all felt the same.. but this time there's that kind of energy coming out from her, she's like.. perfect. she's unique, no girl is like her i am certain... all other girls are sheep compared to her..

     
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