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Not sure if in right place

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Old 12-27-2005, 10:56 PM   #1
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Mikej345 HB User
Not sure if in right place

Well this is i suppose technically a relationship issue since it involves myself and my gf. I have found out today she has started cutting, if you dont know what that is its a form of self-multilation. She has been having issues with her mother ever since her mother caught us having sex. At anyrate i obviously asked my gf to stop doing this, but my problem is this, i know she wont try to kill herself, and with the exception of possible scarring im at a loss as to why to tell her she shouldnt be doing this. I know down deep this is wrong and isnt the way to handle things, but i cant think of a logical reason as to why she shouldnt do it. Please someone help.

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Old 12-28-2005, 05:39 AM   #2
Join Date: Dec 2005
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luvgirl HB User
Re: Not sure if in right place

It is wrong for your gf to be cutting herself because her mom is giving her problems. If the two of you are serious about each other and care for each other than having sex is okay. It sounds like your gf has a really strict mom and by having sex she is going against it. You should talk to your gf and tell her not to do what she is doing is harming herself physically. It wouldn't change anything about her current situation. Go talk to a counsellor about it, or anybody that is willing to listen. Sometimes telling a stranger your anguish is the best thing to do as they will not tell anybody. She can also go talk to her family doctor about all of these issues. They are there to help her as well since she is sick physically from all the cuttings and mentally from her mom. Hope this helps and let us know how she's doing.

Old 12-28-2005, 06:08 AM   #3
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reddoorblack HB User
Re: Not sure if in right place

Mike--there is a sef injury board here. You might find some help there. Good luck.

Old 12-28-2005, 10:01 AM   #4
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: edwardsville illinois
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blueeyes05 HB User
Re: Not sure if in right place

i have a neice who we just found out is cutting. she has only done it a few times but once is to much. the best thing you can do is be there for her. dont pressure her to stop because that will make it worse. she needs to know that she has someone who is going to be there for her totally. this is her way of trying to releve the stress she has. maybe you should sit down with her and her mother and talk. encourage her to seek help in a counsler sometimes being outside the situation can help. she has to want to stop cutting herself no one and nothing can do it for her. and someone needs to talk to her mom! good luck, there are alot of resourses out there to help with these kinds of things but the people closest to her she needs too!

Old 12-28-2005, 11:50 AM   #5
Join Date: May 2005
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dewdrop333 HB User
Re: Not sure if in right place

I agree with Reddoor, please check out the self injury boards here .. I also don't know how old you are but you may have an outreach program at your school where she can talk to a counselor.

She needs help to develop more productive ways to cope with hard situations. As you get older the situations don't get any easier. You wouldnt want her to cut her self too deep accidenlty and kill herself.

Its a hard thing to deal with, I understand. You can be there for her but please encourage her to get some help.
Mother is the word for God on the lips and hearts of children - The Crow

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