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Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

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Old 12-29-2005, 07:29 AM   #1
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 56
Ken-Y HB User
Need to move on, but cant fill this lonely void

I have posted numerous times before about a girl I had been dating who I recently broke up with a while ago and wanted to get back with her. I told her I wanted to try things out again and she told me she would think about it. She wrote me the other day and told me she doesnt think it would work out. She has alot of stuff goin on and shes leaving to visit her best friend in London at the end of january or mid february and doesnt know how long she is going to be gone. Im really having a hard time now. It seemed she wanted to try this again and then she tells me this.

I dont know what Im going to do. Im so sad and feeling so depressed over this. I didnt just like her alot, she was also one of my best friends and I thought things could still work out. Before we got together and when we were together she would call me all the time at night and we would talk for hours and text me all through the day and tell me she missed me and wanted to see me. Even when she went out with her friends. When I read that email I understood where she was coming from even though I didnt want this at all but what really made me feel bad was the way she ended it by saying "call me sometime". I was so use to us talking everyday and night all the time that when I read that it made me think she just doesnt want to really talk anymore. I havent heard from her (except from reading her email) in 2 days. Thats the longest I have gone without talking to her since knowing her for 2 years.

Im so sad and dont know how I can replace the attention and feeling that she gave me. Yea I have other friends that I go out with and stuff but they only call sometimes when they want to go out and theres no one else. She would go out of her way to call me and I think thats why I feel so bad about all this. The past 2 nights I would leave the phone next to my bed like I use to and wait to hear from her, but she never called. I figured shes busy because shes always the one to call. I think she just doesnt want to get to attached either before she leaves or something. She told me that in the email to. Its her birthday today and I just sent her a message saying happy birthday so I know I wont hear from her today either because she will be out.

I dontk now how I am going to replace this void that I have right now. No other girl seemed to care about me like this. Where am I going to find someone to talk to now on these nights when I dont go out and can just talk about anything for long time.I feel so lonely now and dont know what to do. I dont think I will find someone like that for a very long time. Sure I have plenty of friends that are girls but it was nothing like what I had with this one. I guess I just needed some place where I can write about all this and I appreciate you all for reading this. I know I need to move on I guess but it just feels so lonely now.

Last edited by Ken-Y; 01-06-2006 at 10:02 AM.

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Old 12-29-2005, 08:37 AM   #2
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 294
Gundam HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

Sorry to hear that Ken.

I have experienced something very similar, I think I'm still in "it" actually ... the best advice I think I can give you is: - turn off your cell phone when you go to sleep, so that you wouldn't be expecting anything, that's what I have learnt from my past relationship. I bet you have sleeping problems too, because you are constantly waiting for her calls ...

I broke up with a young beautiful girl about 4 momths ago, as devastated as you are now, I also had a very hard time coping with that lost, but beleive it ... time will definitely heal you. That void feeling of yours is still going strong I beleive, but it will fade, day by day. That's just reality. Go out & meet more people, meet your friends. If your friends don't call you, you call them.


Old 12-29-2005, 09:36 AM   #3
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 56
Ken-Y HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

Yea i know its what I need to do thanks man.

Old 12-29-2005, 12:05 PM   #4
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 109
kalbc311 HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

Dam Ken, sorry to hear that.. I am in the same situation and awaiting the answer. I suspect that iof she has to think about it long it cant be good news. I know how you feel and I guess it is time i need to move on as well. Just know you are not alone. i always thought "Id never meet another girl i loved liked that" until i met the next one. The same will be true for you. Hopefully you have told her everything you have said here so you dont have any regrets. If so, let her go. Good luck man.

Old 12-29-2005, 02:39 PM   #5
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 128
Kentucky_Miss HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

I am sorry to hear that this is hurting you. The only thing that will help mend your heart is time, patience, and keeping yourself busy. Perhaps you can write a "letter" to her that you don't plan to send, do this everyday if need be. I hope everything works out well for you, as I'm sure it will.

Old 01-06-2006, 05:34 AM   #6
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 4
Tiaz HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

Im sorry that you feel like this i really feel for you.
My boyfriend and I are considering breaking up becasue our relationship isnt like it use to be everything is going down hill and i feel as if I cant cope.I already cant cope and were not actually over yet. Im affraid ill never be able to have the connection we had with any other guy. we talked on the phone even after a day of being togther he was the first person i talked to in the morning and the last person i spoke to before i went to sleep.
we shared so many special things togther and im so scared of not being with him.
Since im kind of in the same situation as you. the only way i can try and make myself feel better is by telling myself i will find someone out there that deserves me more and im sure you will fidn soemone who will replace the girl you love. just smile and think positive maybe you can help me with my post?

Old 01-06-2006, 10:01 AM   #7
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 56
Ken-Y HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

Yea we are kind of in the same situation. Ive been goin through this a while now and I am still not over it completely. As time goes it will get better but at first it can be devastating. If you guys do break up you should try and go out with your friends and keep yourself busy. The worst thing to do is to sit at home and think about everything. I got so use to talking to her all the time when she would wake up and late into the night before we went to sleep I dont know how I could ever get over that and I miss that alot right now. I have been going out with friends and trying to do my best to meet other people but I think its to early and it is pretty hard to get over it.Its still extremely hard and I lose sleep sometimes. I dont want this to sound like its going to kill you and your never going to get over it but im still in the early stages and it will get better after a while. There is someone out there who is better for you. I guess it takes a while to get over it but it varies in the person I guess. Time will heal everything, until then stay strong and let me know how it works out.

Old 01-06-2006, 02:35 PM   #8
Senior Veteran
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 797
eve40 HB User
Re: Need to move on, but cant fill his lonely void

Hi Ken,
You've done all you could possibly do. Now, you need to let go and find a way to move on. Come here to unload, but it's time to start getting out there and meet new people, develop some hobbies and interests, work on your inner self. I think that would make you happier. It is time to seriously consider start No Contact.

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