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-   -   Should I dump my selfish, cheating girlfriend? (https://www.healthboards.com/boards/relationship-health/352741-should-i-dump-my-selfish-cheating-girlfriend.html)

Morboro 12-31-2005 04:47 PM

Re: Should I dump my selfish, cheating girlfriend?
 
Dump her man, I could not stand being in a relationship like that.

Maybe if you dump her she might realise what a fantastic guy you were and what she has ruined.

What I've started to learn is that never let a woman have control over a relationship, you have to be the dominate one, don't let her control you, your the man!

Ruth6:11 01-01-2006 07:18 AM

Re: Should I dump my selfish, cheating girlfriend?
 
[QUOTE=degen95]how about her wanting to have sex with other guys?? :rolleyes:[/QUOTE]

She isn't married, she isn't even engaged from what I can tell.
She's doing everything that a wife does and she HASN'T slept with anyone else yet (see the first post).
Until you hear the words "Forsaking all others until death do you part" at a marriage ceremony you are legally SINGLE - She CHOOSES not to sleep with anyone else and is giving you a wake up call with that comment about the option of other men my friend.
(Thanks Hiya!)
:angel:

Nina000 01-01-2006 02:05 PM

Re: Should I dump my selfish, cheating girlfriend?
 
[QUOTE=Guinea-Pig]
The main problem is sex. She hardly ever used to be sexual with me, blaming it on her stressful job. Then she quit the job and for a while things were fantastic, with frequent and exciting sex. But now she's just slipped into her old useless habits, and the more I get frustrated and complain the less she sleeps with me - we've only had sex twice in the whole of December. Ideally I would like to be having sex 3 or 4 times a day, but realistically 3 times a week would be fine, is that asking too much? She admits herself that sex with me is great, but she hardly makes any effort to try to be intimate with me, she often pushes my hand away when i try to touch her, and she won't wear sexy lingerie or even be naked with me usually. When we go to bed she just puts her pyjamas on and rolls over, just like a damn kid, like no-one ever told her that when adults go to bed there are other options besides sleeping.

Also, she insists on being allowed to sleep with other men occasionally. She hasn't actually done this yet (I know cos I tap her MSN, email and cellphone messages, oh come on do you blame me!?!) and probably won't do it much or ever cos she hardly has any friends and little social life, but it's the principle that counts. She says I can do the same if I really want to but I don't particularly want to, I want to have sex with her. I'm not happy with her not giving me sex, yet wanting to do it with other people, do you see?

What I think but can't admit is that she just wants to keep me on hold for later, just because I'll be earning a lot of money and she thinks she can have her way all the time, but I want to be her lover not some ****ing d1ckhead to be taken advantage of.


I think that the only way to make her realise how rubbish she is being would be to dump her, then she would suddenly miss having me to cuddle her, spoil her, pay for the expensive appartment and bills, and tell her she's beautiful every five minutes and she'd hopefully regret everything. But then it would be too late and we'd be finished, which doesn't help me.
[/QUOTE]

Hi Guinea...I partly understand where you are coming from and definitely think that you have every right to have a sexually healthy relationship..However, I think that you do have to understand that YES with a stressful job, she has also the right to say I am tired. I have been through this, and although noone loves sex more than I do, there were times, up to two weeks sometimes when I physically COULDN'T make love. I don't quite understand what you mean by saying that she's back to her old useless habits???!!!!

The other thing is that I think that it is not your right to look secretly at her mobile...email, etc....and yes I blame you for it. Don't suffocate her, and the fact that she mentions sleeping with other men, says that she is not happy with you in one way or another!! Do you say to her that you are gonna sleep with other women????

My advice is try to be less insistent, and try to make her take the initiative on her own, by loving her in other ways too. Then if she still refrains, then it's worth pointing out for her that your needs are not being satisfied. And you might want to consider being with someone else.


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